Because Sawyer knew the boy was right.
He was a liar. He couldn’t live in his own skin any longer, especially with everything he loved and dreamed of and hoped for right in front of him. A wife he loved. A son to care for. A home and a family. everything he’d never believed in, so he was taking off before it could blow up in his face.
Wolfe twisted his lips and hung the towel around his neck. “I understand, man. you’re not letting us down; you’re just doing what we all do. Coping. I was wrong to believe there was something more. Not your fault.” He walked past him toward the door. “I’ll finish up until Purity opens, then I’m going back to New york. Don’t jerk Julietta around anymore. Not when you already have your mind made up to leave.”
Wolfe disappeared.
Sawyer dropped to the bench and slumped against the wall. His instincts roared at him to go after Wolfe and prove the boy wrong. Drag Julietta out of bed and admit his cowardice, tell her he’d fight for her, for Wolfe, for all of them. But all he heard was his foster father’s taunt-ing words reminding him over and over he’d never be enough. Gossip would be gleeful, especially considering his current limelight with his new hotel chain. The press had been trying to hook him up for years, and any nega-tive story would involve Julietta and eventually La Dolce Famiglia. And what about Wolfe? What if they discovered the boy lived with them and they began prying into his past? He couldn’t risk it.
Letting them go might be the biggest gift he had to offer.
They deserved everything.
Sawyer rose from the bench and headed toward the free weights. He wouldn’t come out of the room until his body was completely drained and shaking with exhaustion.
Maybe then he’d find a sliver of peace.
…
He walked the site and took note of the new developments with a tingle of pride. His vision shimmered before him, almost complete. The details were finally coming together to complete a portrait of exotic lushness paired with an envi-ronment that welcomed travelers home, with all the mod-ern luxuries, from a dedicated technology and video room for business executives needing to Skype and hold online meetings, to the pampering spa, pools, hot tubs, and steam rooms. The rich textures of polished marble, glittering crystals, plush velvet, and rich mahogany conjured old and new worlds. He’d used his private art collection to make sure the main rooms inspired, like a high-class art gallery for his guests.
Sawyer closed his eyes for a moment and pictured the hotel full, his dream finally complete. And wondered why the culmination of his goal beat like a hole in his heart.
empty. Void. Dead.
“Hey, it’s looking good, man.”
Sawyer turned toward Max. A flicker of guilt trickled through him. Blowing off the family dinner had been a visible slap in the face to Julietta and everyone else. Wishing he knew a different way to handle it, Sawyer shook Max’s hand and forced a smile. “Thanks. Listen, sorry I couldn’t do dinner last night. Got caught up in the office. Hope you understand.”
“Sure. We’ve all been there, especially around a new opening. Can I talk to you a sec?”
Warning bristled his nerves. “Sorry, got a meeting.
Maybe later.”
“Just a minute. Please?”
Coldness seeped through his veins. “okay.” He led Max up the stairs and into the shell of what would be his private office. The empty room was devoid of furniture and details, confirming it couldn’t be a long talk. “What’s up?”
“Julietta told me what was going on with you. Blackmail.
Not any details, just the bare bones of some ass**le with threats. Wanted to see if you needed any help.”
“Appreciate the gesture. But I got it handled. Thanks.”
He began walking out, but Max didn’t move. Sawyer’s heart stuttered in an uneven rhythm. “Not done yet,” Max said. Sawyer stiffened in preparation. “See, I don’t think you have it handled. I think you believe you’re in this alone and need to fix something from years ago that you had no control over. Problem is, you’re married to Julietta now. you’re stuck with a family, and we don’t let one of our own deal with this shit alone. you probably know as many people as I do, but not the same type. I know a guy. So this is how it’s gonna work. you give me a name. And you don’t get con-tacted again. Capisce?”
In the Twilight Zone of the conversation, Sawyer’s lip quirked with humor. “Did you really say the words ‘I know a guy’? Have I been recruited into a bad episode of Mobsters?”
Max didn’t smile. “I’m not f**king around, Sawyer.”
He realized his friend was dead serious. “Thanks for the offer, but I’m handling it.”
“By pulling away from your wife? From Wolfe? By tor-turing yourself with what-ifs you can’t change?”
“How much did she tell you?”
Max shrugged. “Not much. But I’ve known you for a long time. We’ve been friends awhile, and though we don’t talk about your past, I’m not an idiot. I know shit happened.
I know who you are today and what type of man you be-came. That’s what matters.”
The truth hit him in the face like a belly flop. “Jesus, I didn’t expect this heart-to-heart.” His nerves rubbed raw against the look on Max’s face. A need to share and to trust him rose up. “you were wrong, Max,” he said softly. “I’m not good enough. Julietta needs someone who can make her happy. Love her the way she deserves. Keep her safe.
It’s not me.”
“yes it is. But you gotta believe it before it can happen.” Max leaned against the empty wall. “When Carina and I finally got together, we had a lot of work to do. We played this ridiculous game of back-and-forth. I didn’t think I could ever be good enough for her. She was a woman meant for family, marriage, a commitment. But she never let up until I caved. When we got married, I realized it’s not about being good enough. It’s just about loving them enough to want to be good enough. We all deserve that shot. especially you. By the time I got my act together, Carina had gone through the same thing. Not believing in herself or who she was. It took a while, but she got there, and I waited. See, there’s no perfect person out there for Julietta, dude. you’re already screwed. She loves you, and when one of the Conte sisters falls, you don’t get away.
you can run as far and fast as you want, but I bet she’ll be waiting for you when you get there.” Max shook his head.