No man had ever staked a claim on me in front of my son.
And, even if they had, I doubt they would have been able to do it in such a way that made Cai feel more secure instead of less so.
The decision as to whether we took this ‘thing’ between us further was still mine. But I couldn’t use Cai as a cover any more. As well as not being an answer, avoidance was no longer an option.
Alexi wouldn’t allow it to be an option. So I pulled on my big girl panties and took my son’s other hand as we made our way out of the house to Alexi’s car.
Cai swung between us. As his sturdy little body lifted into the air, my heart swooped and swung with him, and my gaze met Alexi’s.
This day would be a new experience for all three of us. We weren’t a family, but we were both Cai’s parents, and that was all that mattered today.
CHAPTER TWELVE
Alexi
I BRAKED THE car in front of Belle and Cai’s villa as the sun dipped towards the horizon. Swinging my head round, I spotted Belle in the back seat, her head propped against the window, her eyes shut. Our son sat in the car seat beside her, his small head lolling to one side.
A smile spread up my chest to my lips at the sight of them both fast asleep. It had been an exhausting day. But I had discovered several important lessons about being a father, or even simply being a friend to a four-year-old. Their energy seemed to operate on a scale of ten or zero—full-on or fast asleep—and there was no in between. The questions never ended and could be repeated on a loop. I’d answered everything, from what was my favourite animal to why I liked racing cars, not once but approximately four hundred times.
The other thing I had discovered was that Belle was a magnificent mother. All her attention had been focused on the boy today, checking that he was okay, answering the questions I could not, directing him in everything from manners to personal safety with an ease that was always thoughtful, patient and never unkind.
The car’s engine purred to a stop as I turned off the ignition.
Belle’s eyelids fluttered open, the rich emerald instantly alert. ‘We’re here. I’m sorry. I must have drifted off,’ she murmured, her voice thick with sleep. Would she sound like that when she awoke in the morning? The pheromones that were never silent buzzed back to life. I ignored them, as I had done all day.
‘It’s been a tiring day,’ I said.
‘It must have been a baptism of fire for you,’ she said, sending me a rare unguarded smile. My heart skipped at the thought of how much I had missed that smile. I’d seen it several times today whenever Cai had done something funny, silly or simply enthusiastic—and every time it had had the same effect on my heart rate—but this was the first time it had been directed
at me.
‘Cai’s pretty full-on,’ she added. ‘Especially when he’s excited. But you were wonderful with him. I hope you know he hero worships you now?’
Her praise was as genuine and unguarded as her smile.
‘I’m sure it’s normal for any active four-year-old,’ I murmured, at least one thing I could now say with some authority.
‘Thank you,’ she said, then stretched her arms up in a yawn. It made her T-shirt stretch over her full breasts. The spike of heat hit me hard. ‘For making today so fun for him...’ she finished.
The spike of heat was followed by a spike of irritation.
‘I’m his father—why wouldn’t I?’ I asked.
‘Of course,’ she said, the guilt shadowing her eyes again.
I wanted to snatch the words back. ‘Now it’s my turn to be sorry,’ I said.
‘Why?’ she asked, those mossy eyes widening. ‘You have every right to be angry with me for creating this situation.’
‘No, I don’t,’ I said firmly. ‘And, anyway, that’s not why I snapped at you.’
‘Why did you, then?’ she asked, with that artlessness which still confused me.
I let my gaze roam down to her breasts and immediately felt the sexual tension snap between us before lifting my gaze. ‘Because being this close to you all day and not being able to touch you has been an exercise in frustration.’
The blush flooded her face, reddening her pale skin and illuminating her freckles in the half-light from the setting sun. She chewed her lip. ‘Oh,’ she said in that husky tone of voice which told me I wasn’t the only one who had been frustrated.
‘But that is my cross to bear,’ I added, just in case she assumed I was blaming her for not being able to control my own libido. ‘Not yours.’