Graham
I’m fucking nervous.Standing in the center of a sold-out arena surrounded by forty thousand people doesn’t even phase me. But this?
My palms are clammy, and I can’t stop pacing the damn house. After a phone call with my mom and Allie, I should be feeling a little less nervous, but somehow, I’m even more anxious than before I called them. Not because I wasn’t sure of what was about to happen; no, I’ve never been more certain of anything in my entire life. It’s just that… a grand gesture is alotof fucking pressure.
I check my watch again. Five minutes until Emery should be home.
After this morning, I knew exactly what I wanted to do. I’d been thinking about it, obsessing over it, and seeing how the last two days had gone? Totally cemented my decision.
I made the call, and now my life is forever changed.
I look over at the girls in their bouncers, chewing their fists happily as the little starfish and seahorses bounce with them.
“Don’t look at me like that Char… you either Quinn. There are only two ways I see this going. Good, or bad. And your daddy is an optimistic guy.”
Baby gurgle.
They get it.
What happens next will change the course of my life. Not just my life… Emery’s life. Quinn and Charlotte’s life. All of us.
I hear the front door slam, and I look at the girls.
“It’s go time, baby girls.”
I wait for Emery to round the corner of the kitchen, and when she comes into view, she looks so fucking stressed.
Her normally bright blue eyes seem dull, and there are heavy bags under them.
Fuck, Em.
We haven’t talked about the other night when she cried in my arms. I haven’t brought it back up because I knew she didn’t want to talk about it. If she did, she would’ve come to me.
Things have been slightly better in the sense that she’ll look at me when we speak now, but she’s still keeping me at arm’s length. Still putting up the same wall, and refusing to let me in.
“Hey Em, how was your day?”
She smiles, but it doesn’t reach her eyes. “It was long. I’m trying to adjust to going back to work. It’s hard, being away from the girls.”
“You know…”
She nods, stopping me. “I know. How was your day?” She walks over to Charlotte and Quinn, picking each of them up in her arms and showering them with kisses and raspberries.
“How was your day, my sweet little babies? Did you and your daddy play today?”
“Yes, we did lots of tummy time. Charlotte hates it with the burning fire of fifty suns. Jesus. But, on the positive side, Quinn does not.”
Emery laughs, shaking her head. “That’s okay. It’s important so, hopefully, the more we do it, the more she’ll like it.”
We eat dinner, bathe and get the girls swaddled and in their bassinets when I finally decide it’s the time to tell her.
“Em, can we talk for a minute?” I ask.
She eyes me suspiciously, setting her phone down on the coffee table next to the couch.
“Uh, maybe you want to sit down for this,” I say, half joking, and half not.
“Okay, now you’re freaking me out. What’s happening?”