“Have you seen other concerts here?”I force myself to ask, despite being rendered nearly speechless from the feel of my hand in his.
“Oh, sure.I went to school here.And then for two years I taught here at the Academy before I kind of fell into intelligence work.”
“You were a teacher here?”
“Yeah.Right after I was injured and kind of trying to figure out where to go from there.”
“Did you like teaching?”
“I like what I do now a lot more.I didn’t quite have the patience back then I needed.But it was okay.They’ve actually had me give guest lectures here sometimes, especially now that I’ve got some clout in the intelligence community.”
“You didn’t have patience?I’m having a hard time believing that.You were so good with Nicholas.”
“Well, I’m older now, for one thing.”
“And for the other thing?”
“I think teaching kind of made me feel like a has-been back then.At that time in my life, I was still wanting to be with the Teams.So, standing in front of a classroom talking about what Iusedto do… it made me feel a little old before my time, you know?”
“Old before your time,” I repeat.“I can relate to that.”
He gazes at me as we step out of the chapel.“How so?”
“I sometimes feel like motherhood kind of—I don’t know—aged me a little more quickly than I thought it would.Especially those first few years when all the surgeries were going on.And then the divorce.”
“For the record, you don’tlookold before your time at all.”
I grin, grateful for his words more than I probably even should be.“Thanks.And right back atcha,” I add.
Still blissfully hand in hand, we turn toward his parked car after we descend the chapel steps.With his military ID, he was able to park close by, and I’m wishing we had a long, long walk to the car instead.Because I don’t want to let go of his hand.
“Snow,” I whisper when a few flakes flutter down in front of me.I look up at the sky, and the full moon we enjoyed earlier has just slipped behind a passing cloud.
“Looks like we might get an even whiter Christmas than we already have.”
“I hope so.I love it when the snow is fresh.It looks so pristine.So new.”I glance at the historic buildings illuminated around me.“Do you want to walk around a little?The Academy is so pretty, lit up at night like this.I’ve never seen it at night before.”
“You’re not too cold?”
I laugh.“I’m tougher than you think.”
He tilts his head a little, looking at me thoughtfully.“Actually, I think you’re tougher than you should’ve ever needed to be.”
I smile as we walk along the pathway through a place he calls “The Yard” and he points out the historic buildings we pass, each lit up in a way that seems to showcase their intricate architecture.
I like that he sees me as tough, I can’t help thinking as we walk along.As strong.Not many people see that about me.It’s not as though I have time in my schedule to work out in a gym or even go for a regular jog.But inside, over the years, I feel as though I’ve gotten tougher, stronger for my son than I ever thought I could or would have to be.
It means so much that he sees that in me.
“You’re raising a really remarkable kid,” he adds, earning even more points in his favor, not that he needed any.
“Thanks.I think he’s pretty great.And we have a good relationship, which is nice.I hear that’s going to change when he gets to be a teen, though.”
“I’m not so sure about that.You strike me as the type to be the cool mom in the neighborhood.”
I laugh.“My son says I’d be a lot cooler if I let him have a dog.”
“Not a dog person?”