With Adrik Tasarov’s baby.
As if that isn’t complicated enough already with everything going on with Yasha, I don’t even know if Adrik wants this baby.
I don't know if he even wants me.
Before Toma can pull away, I flip my hand over and squeeze his fingers, holding him in a death grip. “Have you told anyone else? Does anyone else know?”
He knows what I mean. His eyes widen and he swallows nervously before answering. “I reported only that you were healthy and well as far as I could see.”
“That’s it?” I ask, crushing his fingers even more. “You didn’t say anything else?”
Toma opens his mouth to respond, but before he can, the door to my room opens.
I drop his hand instantly. Toma is all too happy to back away from the bed. The poor man has been through hell today. The last thing he needs is to be raked into my drama.
I look over at the door and suddenly, nothing else matters.
“Isabella,” I breathe, a sob lodged in my throat.
Isabella smiles and wheels over to my bedside. Her blue eyes rake over me nervously, but she smiles. “Mama, you’re awake! I knew I heard your voice.”
“You were in the other room?”
She nods. “I was here before you got here. Adrik carried you in, and…” Her voice wobbles, drops off. Tears gather in her eyes. “I thought you were… you looked…”
I reach out and grab her hand. “I’m fine, honey. Just ask Dr. Toma.”
Isabella looks over at the doctor, her eyes wide and hopeful. Toma grins at her. “Your mother is as healthy as a horse. She’s a strong lady. You don’t need to worry about her.”
The worry melts off of her face, and I want to hug Toma in gratitude. Then—
"More like, your mother is far too stubborn to be undone by a car accident."
Adrik fills the door frame. His sudden appearance draws all the oxygen out of the room.
But I can't bring myself to look at him. Even when it feels like every nerve in my body is aware of him, rising up to pay him notice, I keep my eyes pinned on Isabella.
"Was it scary?" Isabella asks. She feels none of the fear I do. Her eyes are pure with curiosity and the most uncomplicated kind of love. Child loves mother. If only everything else were so simple.
"The accident?" I ask. "It was a little scary, but not too bad."
It was nothing compared to Pietro holding a knife to my throat or Malcolm swearing how miserable he planned to make the rest of my life.
And the accident was nothing compared to how afraid I am now.
I’m afraid of Adrik being this close to me. Also, I’m afraid of how much I wish he was even closer—or maybe a thousand lightyears away; I can’t quite decide.
And then, under it all, is the bomb Toma just dropped. The small life growing inside of me, linking me forever to Adrik Tasarov.
And the fact that I'm not nearly as scared as I should be.
That might be the scariest thing of all.
Isabella releases a shaky breath. “I’m glad you’re awake.”
“We all are,” Adrik murmurs. He moves over to stand next to Isabella. His hand falls lightly on her shoulder, and she doesn’t flinch. They have an ease together that makes my heart throb.
Finally, I force myself to look up into Adrik’s eyes. They’re a bright, clear blue today. The same color as the sky behind Malcolm’s head.
I see the blood spurt out of his neck again, a spray of red.
Adrik did that. He killed Malcolm to… to what? To save me? To capture me?
No. Not that.
I can hear the memory of his voice back in the entryway of the compound, echoing off the bloodstained marble and the crumbling walls. He offered himself in exchange for me.
Take me instead.
Why?
I tip my head to the side and stare into his Arctic blue eyes, wishing I could know what was happening behind them. If the eyes are the windows to the soul, Adrik has drawn the curtains. I can’t get even a glimpse of what he’s thinking or feeling.
I hope he’s just as clueless when he looks into mine. The last thing I need is for him to learn about this baby because I’m so blindingly obvious about the source of the fear clenching my heart.
Even having the thought so close to Adrik makes me panic. I hurry to change the subject.
“What have you two been doing while I’ve been…?” I gesture to the bed and the blankets.
Isabella lights up. “Stefan and I taught Travis tricks! He stands up on his back legs and waves his paws in the air for treats.”
"Aw, that's cute, honey."
“The dog is supposed to be working, not performing like he’s in a circus,” Adrik scowls.
Isabella just laughs, not bothered in the slightest by Adrik’s grumblings. “Travis does lots of work! He’s a good boy. Mama, you have to see him. He’s so cute when he dances.”
“He doesn’t dance,” Adrik says. “He flails his paws in the air. There’s a difference.”
“It’s how he dances,” she argues.
“Well, it’s not dancing.”
“Yes, it is!” She backs up her wheelchair and hits him in the legs, exploding in a giggle when Adrik yelps dramatically and crumbles to the ground in fake pain.
It’s sweet to see them like that. Precious to finally see Isabella with the father figure I always wished I could give her.
It’s also why I have to take her and get out of here as soon as possible.
Whatever Adrik may or may not be to the two of us, he’s Yasha’s brother first and foremost. Adrik always has a plan. He’s always prepared. And I can’t believe he would accidentally marry his brother’s rape victim.
They have a plan. There can be no doubt about that.
We just have to escape before they can put it into place.