She shakes her head. “If you don’t, I don’t.”
Look at us, lying like a couple of besties. Like last year never happened.
Kennedy crouches next to me and lays a cool hand on my knee. “Is there anything I can do to help you set up for the, um. The talk?”
She can’t even bring herself to say the wordséance. It’s aparty game to her. Everything is a game to Kennedy.
“No. Do you have any candles?”
“Tons. Any special colors?”
“Black and white are best.”
“I doubt we have any black candles. But I’ll check.” She disappears into the kitchen, and I open the cellar door and lug my suitcase down. It’s ridiculously heavy. When I get back up to the first floor, Kennedy looks annoyed again. Chase is standing awkwardly by Kennedy’s side. Avoiding my eyes. I stare straight at him. No get out of jail free. Not anymore.
Kennedy shoves him toward me with her hip. “Mila wants to go for a swim.”
Of course she does. “Okay,” I say. “Let her. That’s why we’re here, right? It’s the lake house. There’s the lake.”
“Come with.” Chase offers his usual dazzling smile, but he won’t meet my eye.
“Why?” I blurt out.
“I didn’t know she was coming,” he mumbles, his face flushed. “I told her I’d be here and it would be fun. I didn’t mean it as an invitation. It was a misunderstanding.”
Kennedy slowly begins to back away into the kitchen.
“Fun?” He can do better. I demand better. It does not have to end this way. I suddenly feel more alone than I have this entire year. These entire seventeen years. “Chase?” I despise the pleading in my voice.
“I’m so sorry.” But he says it while walking away from me. And that is not an apology.
Kennedy waits for him to leave and then flutters back to my side. “I don’t know what’s wrong with him.” She furrows her brow.“Are you okay with this? We can go do your ritual right now.”
“I’ll start setting up.” I take a box of white candles from her. “You guys go ahead. Have fun.”
She looks uncertain. “We’re here for you, Emily.”
I wave a hand. “Not at all. Go.”
She spins gracefully, and her skirt whirls up around her. “Give a shout if you need anything.”
Not at all.
I watch them out the window as they gather on the dock. Chelsea sits aside with her book, as usual. Kennedy dips one foot into the water, kicks back and forth for a moment or so, and then arranges herself on her towel to sunbathe, a watchful eye on the lake. Chase splashes in the water like a kid, and Mila lets him hold her and throw her around. She’s not shy like she was at the beginning of last year. She’s grown teeth. Sharp ones. Chase is different around her than he is with me. Lighter. Bouncier. More like the old Chase. Maybe he’s been this way all along, and he only changes when I walk into the room. Or maybe it’s all a performance for my benefit. I don’t know which is worse. It makes my stomach turn.
I run upstairs and tear through Mila’s suitcase, looking for clues that I should have known this was going on all along. All I find are clothes, toiletries, two packs of clove cigarettes (for one weekend?!), a fancy lighter, a packet of sangria mix, and birth control pills. Shit.
Mila.
You know… I hadn’t planned on her. But she came. And look what she brought.
The murder weapon.