He chuckled. “Clearly, but about what in particular?”
I took a small step closer because he was like a magnet pulling me in. “About how amazing you are. I’m so lucky to have you helping me through all this.”
“There are plenty of people who would’ve handled it much better than me.”
I shrugged. “Perhaps. But if I had the chance to choose now, I’d still pick you.” I stared up into hazel eyes that held no hint of humor as they roamed my face. “You’re good and kind and thoughtful. Please try to remember that after I’m gone.”
He sucked on his bottom lip and nodded. Either he didn’t believe what I told him, or he disliked thinking about us parting as much as I did.
It hit me how much Shep gave expecting nothing in return. I wasn’t used to having another person put my needs above their own. For some time now, I’d been the only one looking out for myself. I’d always tried to be strong and not dwell on the fact that something was missing from my life. Or someone.
I sighed. “So, lay it on me. What did Ben say?”
Shep’s frown told me enough, but he gave me the bad news, anyway. “He hasn’t replied yet. I’m sorry.”
Shit.Not what I wanted to hear.
“Give him more time to come through, all right?” Shep nodded as though trying to convince himself as much as me. He was playing it cool, but I suspected he was more concerned than he let on.
I didn’t know what to say. Most people couldn’t go thirty minutes without checking their cell. How could I believe that Ben, a supposed tech guru, hadn’t checked his email in over twelve hours? Something seemed off about that. He must’ve seen it. If he didn’t want to help, he should let us know. But then again, this was a business deal. Shep wouldn’t have told Ben about me or my personal connection to Justin.
Either way, I was convinced Ben wouldn’t help. We were on our own. No,Iwas on my own because Shep wouldn’t do anything more for Justin. He’d told me that last night.
My world closed in around me. Justin’s time was running out, and there was no one coming to help him. The thought made me nauseous.
“Get dressed,” said Shep. “I’ll make us coffee.”
“I think I’ll shower first.” I swallowed down the bile rising in my throat.
“Sure.” Shep gave me a tight-lipped smile and headed for the front of the house with Ranger on his heels.
Nausea churned in my gut on my way to the bathroom.
My hands shook as I turned the shower on. How had my morning gone from one of sheer bliss to one of terror as I considered how I was going to help my brother?
I stepped under the scorching water and tipped my head back. The spray stung like needles pricking my skin.
My hollow stomach continued to roil. I had to come up with an alternative plan fast. Justin didn’t know his location was compromised. I had to warn him to leave town.
There was no way to call Justin. And contacting him via email or social media was useless if he didn’t have a cell. I doubt I could crack into Shep’s laptop, anyway.
The warning had to reach him in person. Someone had to find him before an assassin did.
Even if I could find one of Shep’s burner phones without him noticing, there was no way I would risk using it to ask Tom or one of my friends to deliver a message to Justin. I could never endanger their lives like that.
It needed to be me.
Perhaps it was a death sentence to leave here, but could I live with the guilt of doing nothing? Could I spend the rest of my days knowing that I sat on my hands while dangerous people hunted my brother? I’d rather try and fail than do nothing at all.
I washed my hair and used Shep’s razor to tidy myself. I didn’t know when I’d next get the chance to shower.
It occurred to me that Shep, a complete stranger, had helped me, even though it was risky, and the consequences were fatal. I’d do the same for Justin because he was my blood. He was the only person who showed me love and protected me as a child. We were siblings, and you didn’t give up on family when things got shitty. And despite all of Justin’s shortcomings and mistakes, I still loved him.
How the hell was I going to get to him?
I had one edge over the descending hitmen. I knew where Justin was hiding. If I got to him in time, we’d move south fast until we crossed the border into Mexico. My friend, Abby, who lived in San Carlos, would provide us safe haven. I’d helped her through her own shit show two years ago when she’d needed to escape an abusive relationship. We could count on her.
I rinsed off, although I wished I could stay in the shower and hide from my problems.