Kester nearly choked on his coffee. He set the mug down at the same time as Tarin. “Stu…”
Stuart shook his head. “No. Really. It’s good. What happened last night just proved my point. I have no business letting myself get involved with a woman.”
Tarin stepped closer. “Stu…”
Stuart shot Tarin a glare that shocked Kester. “Not a word. Don’t say a word. Or did you already tell all my secrets to your newly formed family?”
Kester’s eyes widened as he glanced from one man to the other. He’d always suspected Tarin and Stu had a history that ran deep, but this was personal and serious.
Tarin groaned, hanging his head. “I did not tell anyone one fucking word about you, Stu. Stop it. Don’t be a dick.”
Stuart continued to shoot daggers at Tarin. “Even if you don’t air my fucking dirty laundry to other people, you’re still an asshole. I don’t know why you would even consider sharing a woman with me. How can you even trust me to be alone with her? I bet it made your skin crawl to hear she’d come to this apartment last night by herself.” Stuart made an exaggerated gasping sound with a dramatic hand over his heart. “There is no way you and I could ever share a woman, Tarin. So don’t fucking ask me to. And don’t ask me to join your new little family either. It’s not going to happen.”
“Seriously?” Kester asked, his voice elevated. “That’s it? You’re just going to bow out and martyr yourself?” Kester’s head was spinning. Most of what Stuart had shouted made no sense to him, though he could tell by the dark heat on Tarin’s cheeks that the redhead had understood every word.
Stuart jerked his attention to Kester. “Stay out of it. You don’t know anything about me.”
Kester wanted to punch Stuart, but at the same time, he could see the man was hurting. He had deep scars that he kept buried. Though apparently, Tarin knew some of Stu’s story, which wasn’t surprising since Stu had moved in with Tarin’s family when he’d arrived and needed someone to sponsor him. Tarin was there from the beginning. He clearly knew shit.
Kester licked his lips and forced his voice to remain calm. “You’re right. I don’t know much about you because in the two years we’ve lived together, you’ve hardly spoken to me. I know it’s not personal. You’re a private person. But I also know you’ve got skeletons, and I know firsthand that holding that closet closed with your whole body is hard work. It’s exhausting.”
Nearly everyone on earth had a story that would break anyone’s heart. Kester included. His own mother had been kidnapped and taken from him screaming when he was just fifteen. He’d been left alone in the world to fend for himself. Stuart didn’t have a monopoly on sob stories, no matter what his was.
Stuart rolled his eyes. “Doesn’t take any effort at all, asshole. I locked the fucking closet door and threw the key overboard. The only person with a spare key is Tarin.” He shot another glare at Tarin.
Tarin cocked his head to one side and planted his hands on his hips. “Just because you’re an asshole and treated me with no respect at all when push came to shove doesn’t mean I’m also a dick. Your secrets will never leave my lips because that’s the kind of guy I am.” He stated all of this magnanimously as if he were doing Stuart a favor that had not been returned.
Stuart shot daggers at Tarin with his eyes. “Whatever. Aren’t you the perfect martyr? I’m going to make it easier for everyone. Eliminate myself from the equation. Then nobody needs to talk about me or to me. I’ll request more shifts outside of the compound and stay out of your way.”
Kester rubbed his forehead. “And hide? And pretend you aren’t already so enamored with Ariel that you can’t sleep at night?”
Stuart released a sardonic laugh. “Sleep at night? I haven’t done that in years. Meeting Ariel changed nothing.”
“Really?” Kester prompted. “I bet you’re lying. I bet it changed everything. I know it did for me. I think about her all the time. I can’t wait to work this shit out so we can fully claim her once and for all. Together. All of us. As a unit.”
“He’s right,” Tarin added. “You can deny your feelings all you want, but everyone knows you were the first person to meet her and she was under your skin from that very second. Your behavior is an indication to everyone living in this compound that she’s yours and they should keep their damn hands to themselves. Hell, outside of Kester and I, there isn’t another man of any age living here who dares even glance at her for fear you might gouge their eyes out.”
Stuart faltered for a moment, glancing at the ground and shuffling his feet before lifting his face again. “Just because I don’t want to see her dead doesn’t mean I’m in love with her and unable to function without her. This isn’t a romance novel. It’s real life, and in real life people fucking die. It’s easier if you never get too attached to anyone. It hurts less when they die. That includes you two assholes.” He waved a hand toward the door. “Don’t you have work to do somewhere? Stop trying to talk me out of this. My decision is final. Give me a few days to find a place to live and then this apartment is yours.” He spun around and stomped into his room, shutting the door with a resounding snick.
Kester flinched. Holy fuck. The man could say a hell of a lot without saying anything specific. There was no way Kester was going to ask Tarin any questions about what happened when Stuart first arrived five years ago, but obviously, he’d lost someone. Or maybe several people. Hell, they all had.
Hardly anyone alive hadn’t lost a family member or two. Ariel had lost both her parents three months ago. Somehow she was handling it better than most people would have. She was strong. Solid. Amazing.
Whatever happened to Stu was still controlling his life. It was still raw on the surface and eating at him. Kester felt sorry for the man who walled himself off from everyone and worked himself to the bone to ensure people got to safety.
Stu was a good man. He would give his shirt to anyone. He had traveled long distances many times, putting his life in danger to rescue strangers and bring them into the fold. He was always the first to volunteer for a run on the outside. He could go long hours and sometimes days without sleep when it was called for.
But it was all a front. Inside, he was hurting, and Kester didn’t think there was any chance he or Tarin or anyone else could talk him out of his determination to cut them off. Lord knows they’d all tried.
The next problem was informing Ariel and then letting her decide if it was time to stop trying.