“Right now,” he cut me off, “I’m learning about self-control I didn’t know I had. But if you don’t finish, then my hands are leaving this couch to help you. Do you understand?”
My gaze darted to his hands that were gripping the couch so hard his knuckles were white. He sat perfectly still, his eyes never leaving me. My clit was throbbing, and the tiniest movement of my hips had my body ricocheting with pleasure again.
After giving him one last glare, I slammed my eyes shut again. He was right. It was helping me. But I refused to look at him when I did it. I blocked him out as I ground against his leg again, letting my mind go blank as I focused on the enjoyment my body was receiving.
I climbed to the edge again and cried out as my orgasm consumed me. My body locked up as it slowly ebbed away. Reality crashed into me, and I froze in place. I couldn’t believe that had just happened. My mind was finally clear from the past, and I tore myself off him. His last words of the conversation we were having before my panic came rushed back to my head.
Things clicked into place from what he said and what Alex had told me about the society when we were up north. My gaze shot to him as I realized something I had been missing. Disbelief and terror kept me rooted to the spot as I stood in front of the couch. The pleasure that had just consumed me was long gone. Niko tilted his head to the side, confused at my sudden change.
“A man gets old enough to bear children.” I repeated his words from earlier.
“Sage—”
“Who’s older? You or Geo?”
Niko didn’t answer. For once, he wouldn’t look at me.
“How did I not see it before? Alex had said it was for his family. For him. For you.” My voice was getting higher with each word. “For Geo. Who did it, Niko? Who killed my sister? You or Geo? It had to have been one of you. Alex is the youngest.”
He stood up, not saying a word. His eyes were clouded over with anger and what looked like a small amount of guilt.
“Who was it?” I yelled, shoving him in the chest. “Did you do it? And then come here to taunt me with it?”
“I told you, I came to help—”
“Tell me,” I snarled. “Was it you or Geo?”
He bowed his head, backing away from me. “Knowing who did it isn’t going to change anything.”
“Get out. Get out,” I screamed, knowing he wasn’t going to answer me. For the first time in months, I completely lost it. Tears were pouring down my face, and disgust nearly had me heaving from what I had just done with him. His family was the reason Lacey and my mom were dead. There was a fifty-fifty chance he was the one who’d killed my sister. And I’d gotten pleasure from him.
My rage exploded, and I raised my arm to slap him, but he caught my hand inches from his face.
“I’m going to leave. But you need to hear this first.” My hand stayed locked in his grip as he spoke. “I came here to warn you. So you can literally keep living. Don’t be stupid. Keep your head low. You can’t beat the society, no matter how badly you want to.”
He talked fast as I pulled away from him.
“Sage, if someone else other than me finds you, then you will end up like your sister. There can’t be loose ends. People knowing that aren’t part of our group. I can’t help if they find you. It’s all on you.”
I froze and met his eyes. “Can’t help me, or won’t?”
He seemed to deliberate on what to say. “There will be nothing I can do for you if they find you. I came here and warned you. Something I could do. Now you’re on your own.”
He let go of my hand and backed up toward the door, keeping his gaze on me until he twisted the handle and opened it.
“I’m sorry about Lacey. I wish it hadn’t been her who was chosen. Be careful, Sage. Stay hidden.” With his last words, he stepped out of the apartment and shut the door behind him.