All she could do was protect herself.
“I don’t think it’s a good idea. Not now.” Her gaze softened. “Everything is so heightened. With my high blood pressure and the fashion show and the due date closing in, I don’t know if my heart can take much more.” She rubbed her stomach. “I need to concentrate on this little one. She’s all that matters.”
His throat bobbed as he swallowed. “That makes sense. You don’t need any more stress. You have more than enough as it is. And I agree, the baby’s health – and yours – are the most important things.”
She waited for relief to wash over her, but all she felt was sadness. Her body ached for him, for his strong arms to wrap around her, for her head to fit against his chest as he cradled her to him.
Taking a bite of the muffin, she swallowed it down and chased it with a mouthful of coffee. But it didn’t fill the hole inside her at all.
“I should go,” he said, putting the blood pressure monitor back in his bag. “Unless you need me for anything else?”
“Can you check the baby?” she asked him. “Listen for a heartbeat?”
“Of course. Why don’t you go lie down and I’ll take a listen.”
She smiled at him. “Thank you. Let’s use the sofa.”
* * *
James warmed up the chest piece of his stethoscope on his palm, then pressed it against Harper’s bare abdomen. She was lying on the sofa, her shirt rolled up to just beneath her breasts, revealing the dome of her swollen stomach.
“Tell me if it’s too cold,” he told her.
“Did they teach you that in medical school, too?” she teased.
“Yep. Right after how to keep your patient from driving you crazy.”
She laughed and it made him feel warm. He tried to push that feeling down, ignore it. It wasn’t useful right now. She’d made it clear that whatever had been going on between them wasn’t going to continue. She’d been sweet as heck about it, too. But it still hurt. Especially as it was all his own damn fault. He’d had everything he wanted, and thanks to his own fears he’d lost it all.
No, that wasn’t true. He hadn’t lost their baby. No matter what happened between him and Harper, their daughter would always be half his. A connection between them that nothing could break. That meant something, didn’t it?
He slid the tips into his ears and concentrated on his job, moving the chest piece around until he could hear a rapid rhythm, much faster than Harper’s own heartbeat. He listened to it, a smile curling his lips. “She’s got a strong heartbeat,” he told Harper. “Want to hear?”
She nodded, and leaned forward as he slid the ear pieces in place. Her eyes lit up as she listened to the echo of their baby’s life source. “So fast,” she whispered. “Such a tiny heart and so much work to do.”
“It sounds like a strong one.” James smiled. “Should keep her going for at least ninety years.”
Harper’s gaze met his and he felt it again. That urgent need to hold her, to take care of her and make her smile every day. To be with her and enjoy her company, then take her to his bed and spend the night.
“Can you see the dark line on my stomach?” Harper asked him. “And the stretchmarks? They’re ugly, aren’t they?”
“Nope.” He winked at her. “They’re as beautiful as the rest of you. And they’ll fade over time, you’ll hardly notice them.”
He wanted to trace their jagged lines, feel her stomach contract at his touch. But instead he wiped his stethoscope down and put it away. It didn’t matter what he wanted, or what
he needed. Right now the only important things were Harper and this baby, and he’d do whatever it took to make sure they were okay.
Everything else could wait.
“You need anything else?” he asked her.
“No.” She smiled. “I’m good.”
He gently rolled down her shirt, covering her stomach back up, and offered his hand to help her stand. “Same time tomorrow?”
“Sounds good to me. I have to wait around for the postman to pick up the last of my custom orders.” She looked at the gown-filled room. “Hopefully I’ll be able to move around in here soon.”
“Let me know if you need anything. Day or night. I always have my phone on.”