First his smile dissolves.
A distant and wholly professional smile takes its place. Then his eyes become cold and forbidding. Fascinated and transfixed I watch his chest lift and fall heavily before he takes his hand away from the glass. Then he turns away from me and faces the world with his mask firmly in its place. I retract my hand and walk back in the direction I came from, my mind’s eye replaying his transformation.
As I reach the swing, my phone rings. I hit accept and Stella starts shrieking into my ear. It is a long and melodramatic screech and I begin to laugh. When she runs out of breath, she takes a quick snatch of air, and carries on all full speed.
I sit on the swing. ‘Stop it,’ I tell her with a laugh.
‘I want to, but I can’t,’ she says and keeps up the shrill sound.
It is so infectious I almost want to join her. We’ve done it before. Both of us shrieking away. It’s actually quite fun, but if I start I’ll probably have all Zane’s staff out here in a second. ‘So you like them then?’ I ask instead.
‘Like them? Like them?’ she screams in my ear. ‘I’m fucking in love with them. I couldn’t believe my eyes. I thought I was seeing things.’ She pauses suddenly and in a far more, by far more, sober voice asks, ‘They’re not knock-offs from China, are they?’
‘No, they’re real,’ I say reassuringly and put the swing into motion.
‘Oh Jesus! I nearly gave myself a small heart attack there!’ she exhales with relief. Then she is back into gush mode. ‘Oh my God, Dahlia. They are fabulous. It’s the best freaking present ever. I couldn’t believe it when I opened the door and postman goes, ‘Been shopping have ya? I was half-asleep and I thought you had sent me the shoes from that woman with the Hong Kong connection, which of course, I would have been over the moon with, but bloody hell! Jimmy fucking Choos! I thought I’d died and gone to heaven.’
‘Have you got them on now?’ I ask with a smile.
‘Don’t be daft. I’ve made an altar in my bedroom and placed them there.’
I laugh, feeling the cold wind in my face as the swing rocks me. ‘Do they fit?’
‘Of course, they fit. If they didn’t I’d have cut my feet to fit,’ she declares intensely.
‘You’re so mad, Stel.’
‘That’s no insult. That’s a gift. Haven’t you heard we throw the best parties. Talking of parties, we have to go out and celebrate my new shoes.’
‘Oh yes, lets, but hang on. Didn’t you go out on a date last night?’
‘Oh, screw him,’ she dismisses in a disgusted voice.
‘Why what happened?’
‘I’ll tell you everything when I see you,’ she says cheerfully, ‘I’ve got loads of exciting things to tell you. Shall we meet tonight?’
‘Tonight is good.’
‘Let’s go to Jamie’s. We’ll get drunk on something completely vile.’
‘Jamies! I can already taste the hangover.’ She can’t see me but I am nodding happily. I really miss Stella. She’s as irresistible as a laughing child.
‘I’m on a diet by the way,’ she says, ‘so can we meet early? That way I can just drink my dinner.’
‘You mean to say we’re not going to end up at Taki’s afterwards?’
‘I said I was missing dinner not supper.’
I laugh.
‘Seven OK with you.’
‘Yup.’
‘Oh, and I might be wearing my new shoes.’
‘You’re wearing them now, aren’t you?’ I ask.
She laughs. ‘You know me too well.’
We say goodbye and I get off the swing and go in search of Noah. As I get to the doors I turn back to look at the garden. At the bottom of it I can see Nico, a young shy boy, filling the bird feeders with seeds. I stand for a minute watching how quickly the blue tits come to feed. As I watch a robin comes and chases the smaller bird away.
That surprises me. I know from watching the birds from my window that the pigeons can be belligerent and antagonistic to each other, but it has never crossed my mind that the pretty Robin could be so aggressive. It reminds me of Zane’s assertion that the world is run by ferocity. Even the thought he could be right makes me sad.
With a sigh I open the door and enter the house. I tell Noah that I am meeting up with Stella at Jamie’s at seven o’clock and he doesn’t bat an eyelid.
‘I’ll check with boss and let you know if it’s OK,’ he says.
‘You can check with him all you like, but I’m going to see Stella tomorrow no matter what,’ I say coolly and walk out of the kitchen door.
My morning is mapped out. I’ll work for a bit, then I’ll work out in the gym and use the steam room.