Shit.
Shit.
I didn’t want to read more because I could tell there was a whole mess about it. Scrolling down and skimming, I saw several lawyer’s names and about six or so pages worth of text. Whatever had happened between them was long, drawn out, and far too many people had gotten intimately involved with Fitz’ business.
I sat back, hugging myself as I tried to think. I knew how private Fitz was because I was the same way. Hell, he was the only one that I had told I was a virgin since freshmen year of college. I could only imagine how much he hated that entire period of his life. So of course, he would want to protect himself and make sure that it never happened again.
He was just protecting himself.
And me.
That thought came to me as a belated epiphany as my mind repeated one of the other comments that had been on the forum post. It had been from an actress who was just a nobody when she slept with another woman who was pretty high up a business ladder. Everything was normal for a while and she forgot about the contract entirely, but then her star had really taken off and the business woman had tried to use that to her advantage. One trip to the lawyer’s later with the NDA in hand, and the business woman backed off while the starlet was able to land her second movie roll.
“I…uh… I think I messed up,” I murmured to no one in particular. Because I was always alone. And I was always alone because I never really trusted anyone to get close enough. If I didn’t trust anyone enough to be a friend, how could I blame Fitz for not trusting anyone to leave his bed without proof that they wouldn’t try to hurt him?
I groaned and flopped back on the bed, feeling silly for having assumed the worst. But how did I go about making up something like this? Had I ruined everything?
I was too experienced to know, even though I felt like it was a yes, so I supposed that all I could do was try.
“But how?” I asked myself and the ceiling above me.
Unsurprisingly, the ceiling didn’t answer.
Fitz
I strode into work with a storm cloud over my head and I could feel everyone that I passed trying not to stare.
I was late, which hadn’t happened unplanned in three years, but I just hadn’t wanted to come into work. I hadn’t wanted to see Bev’s empty desk. Hadn’t wanted to come to terms with the fact that I had chased her off without really trying. Hadn’t wanted to think about why her absence affected me so and why I was so upset.
I could have gone on vacation. I was the CEO and owner, I could do whatever I want. But somehow the thought of galivanting off to where I would have nothing to occupy my thoughts was even worse, so instead I headed in.
But not before dragging my feet about it.
I was braced for another sour morning to bleed into another sour day, nearly throwing open the door to my office, but I stopped dead in my tracks when I saw a steaming cup of coffee from my favorite place sitting on my desk.
I looked behind me. Neither of my secretaries were there.
But if not them…who?
“Morning, sir.”
I looked over to see Bev dutifully filing the papers that I hadn’t bothered with during her absence, already so familiar with my filing system that she didn’t need instructions from me to do so.
“You’re here,” I breathed, so surprised that I wasn’t quite sure what to say beyond stating the obvious.
“Yes, and just in time, it seems. You have a meeting in fifteen minutes with an investor, and then Charlie after that. Do you need me to fetch you some breakfast?”
“Uh, no. I ate.” I said, still in a bit of shock as I went to sit behind my desk.
“Ah, is that why you’re late?”
Her tone was gently curious but… there was something else there. “I had things on my mind.”
“I see.”
She went about continuing her task, and I could see from her profile that she was concentrating fairly hard. I opened and closed my mouth several times to talk to her, but in the end, I had no idea what to say so I just didn’t say anything.
Why was she here? What had happened? Had she decided that her job was worth more than caring about the horrible ending to our coupling? Were we both supposed to pretend that nothing had happened? Could I pretend that nothing had happened?
I didn’t know.
And I didn’t feel like I could ask.
Time slipped by painfully slowly and yet I was still surprised when she looked up from your task. “It’s about time for your meeting sir. Will you need me to take notes?”