CHAPTER11
Kim would like to say it was the music that was responsible for the warmth radiating through her body as she danced with Justin, but that would be a lie. When he’d pulled her into his arms, she’d wanted to get as close to him as possible. Every womanly cell in her body was calling out to her, ready and willing to be close to him again, to feel that connection. Her fingers itched to play with the hair at the base of his neck, but she resisted. Barely.
While her body was ready, willing, and able, she was still upset. She’d gone to his shop wanting to talk to him about what had happened on New Year’s Eve. To confirm that what she was feeling wasn’t one-sided. But instead, he’d announced he’d be helping her to find a Dom.
She was still mad at herself for not saying anything then, but his suggestion had completely thrown her off guard. It wasn’t until she was halfway home that the anger started boiling up inside her.
Kim had almost turned around and driven back to the shop to confront him, but she’d thought better of it. She had a temper. She knew that. And over the years, she’d gotten better at controlling it. Even still, as the night wore on, she’d decided that if he didn’t want her, then she would take matters into her own hands. She didn’t need his help. She’d find her own Dom.
While she’d spoken to several Dominants at the club since she’d joined, she hadn’t taken any of their advances seriously. Not even the ones who’d asked if she’d like to go upstairs and play. She hadn’t been interested.
When she’d arrived at the club tonight, she’d made a point of seeking out one of the Doms who’d been especially attentive to her recently. He was nice enough. Younger than her, but did that really matter? Age didn’t necessarily dictate whether a person was a good Dominant or not.
But the entire time she’d been talking to Kurt, she could feel Justin’s gaze on her. She knew he was watching, and it made it difficult to focus on what Kurt was saying. Eventually, she found an excuse to end the conversation and rejoin Ali’s friends.
They didn’t quite feel like her friends yet, even though they had welcomed her into their group. She was still trying to get used to all the different dynamics and how the lifestyle worked.
Outside of Ali, the one she felt most comfortable with, was Lady Beth. She wasn’t sure why, but there was something about her that put Kim at ease. So when Beth had asked her if she wanted to join her on the dance floor, Kim had jumped at the chance. She needed to get out of her own head and thought maybe if she wasn’t talking to another man, Justin would find someone, or something, else to focus on.
That didn’t happen. She’d tried not to look in his direction as she danced next to Beth, to ignore him, but it was impossible. Kim could feel him watching her.
What she hadn’t anticipated was that when she came out of the bathroom, he’d be there waiting for her. Her plan had been to avoid him, but all that went out the window when she saw him standing there.
“I’m mad at you,” she said.
He opened his eyes but didn’t meet her gaze. “I know.”
When he didn’t continue, she figured she’d have to be the one to say something. “Do you think I’m that incapable that I can’t find a Dom on my own? I know I’m new here, but Ali’s been helping me, and—”
“It’s not that.” His hands flexed on her hips and the muscles in his jaw tightened.
“What then?”
It took him a few moments to answer. “I thought that maybe if you found a Dom, belonged to someone else, this thing between us would somehow go away.”
So she wasn’t imagining it. He was feeling it, too.
“That was really stupid.”
Justin tugged her closer, bringing their lower halves together. She could feel the hard length of him against her stomach. “Stupid doesn’t begin to cover it.”
Kim didn’t think he was talking about his asinine suggestion of helping her find a Dom anymore. She decided to take a leap of faith and put it out there. “I want you to be my Dom.”
He pinched his eyes closed again and leaned forward to rest his forehead on hers. She could feel the tension radiating off him.
Kim knew what was going through his head. “Mark doesn’t have to know.”
Justin’s eyes popped open.
“No one outside the club has to know.”
He lifted his right hand and cupped her jaw. His touch was firm, possessive. She loved it.
“You’re not going to be my dirty little secret. I won’t hide you away like I’m ashamed of you.”
She thought he’d be pleased with her suggestion to keep their relationship hidden, but he seemed offended by the notion. Still, she wasn’t ready to let go of her suggestion. “Not forever. And I know you’re not ashamed of me. But maybe this thing with us will fizzle out if we stop trying to put the brakes on. Is it really worth upsetting Mark if we’re not going to last?”
Justin tilted her face up, bringing them nose to nose. “I’ve wanted you for seventeen years. The only thing getting a taste of you has done is make me want you more.”
Her chest clenched at his declaration. She licked her lips and swallowed. Her heart felt as if it were going to pound out of her body. He’d wanted her for seventeen years? “Why didn’t you say anything seventeen years ago?”
“You know why.”
His gaze was on her lips now and she knew he wanted to kiss her. She wanted that, too. She wanted to lose herself in the only man who’d ever made her feel this way. “I used to lie in bed after football games and think of you in those tight pants while I touched myself.”
Justin groaned. She couldn’t tell if it was a good groan, or if he was upset by her confession. “When?” he choked out.
“The first time?”
He nodded.
“It was the first game of your senior year. I was wiggling in my seat the entire evening. Mom scolded me because I wouldn’t sit still.” Kim slid her fingers up into his hair, bringing their bodies more in line. Normally, even at a dance club, being this entwined with a guy on the dance floor would have her self-conscious. But they were at Serpent’s Kiss, and what they were doing was considered tame given they both still had all their clothes on. “As soon as we got home, I shut myself in my room and...relieved the tension.”
His left hand, which had been on her hip, moved lower to cup her ass. “Why does that make me horny as hell?”
Normally, she’d laugh, but the vibe pulsing through the air was thick with suppressed sexual tension. “Did you ever...”
He knew what she was asking. “Frequently.”
The song they were dancing to changed, and the pulse of it beat in her veins. Justin adjusted their bodies, positioning his leg between hers. His thigh was against the heart of her need and instinctively, she pressed herself against him.
A smirk formed on his lips, and she realized he’d done it on purpose. For some reason, that only made her hotter.
The hand that was gripping her ass ground her against him with the rhythm pounding out of the speakers. It was hypnotic and sensual. Kim felt her arousal building. She was dry humping him right there on the dance floor in front of everyone and she didn’t care.
She closed her eyes, letting the sensations build. He knew what he was doing and she felt his breath on her lips as she inched closer to that elusive peak.
“Are you going to come for me?”
Her breath hitched and she nodded.
His thumb grazed the side of her neck. “Open your eyes and look at me. I want to look into your eyes as you come.”
Kim did as he asked and met his heated gaze. She knew he was as turned on as she was. His erection was pressing hard against her belly, only adding to the fire burning inside her. She’d never been one for exhibitionism, but in that moment if he’d asked her to drop to her knees and suck him off, she would have done it in a heartbeat.
All thought left her as he placed both of his hands on her hips and used all his efforts to grind her against his leg. “Come for me, baby,” he whispered in her ear.
His words seemed to have a direct connection to her clit. She tightened her hold on him. She was so close. All she needed was a little more...
Justin gripped her ass again, this time with both hands, and began moving her with a purpose. There was no hiding what they were doing, but that didn’t matter. The only thing that mattered was what she was feeling in that moment.
Her orgasm hit her fast and hard. A squeak left her lips before she could contain it. She buried her head in Justin’s chest as her body trembled with her release.
As her heart rate returned to normal, their surroundings came into focus. She glanced over at some of the people nearby and knew that what they’d done hadn’t been missed. Embarrassment trumped her orgasmic high and she tried to step away.
Justin held firm. “Where do you think you’re going?”
She couldn’t look at him. “I can’t believe I did that.”
Her words were mumbled into his chest, but she knew he’d heard her.
He chuckled.
“It’s not funny.”
That only made his chest vibrate more. “No one cares that you dry humped me on the dance floor. Did you forget where we are?”
“No.” She hadn’t forgotten where they were, but that didn’t change the fact that she’d never done anything like that in public before.
When she didn’t say anything else, he tilted her chin up so he could see her face. “There’s no need to be embarrassed.”
“I know, but...”
They’d stopped dancing. “But?”
Silence fell between them as she thought about what she was feeling. In the moment, she hadn’t cared. Wanted more, in fact. But now her levelheaded nature was kicking in.
Justin dropped his hand. “Have you changed your mind about me being your Dom?”
Despite her embarrassment over what they’d just done, that hadn’t changed. She wanted him. The night they’d spent together had altered something in her. And not only the realization that she was submissive. She felt a connection with Justin that she’d felt with no other man.
At first, she’d thought it was because he was a Dominant. The way he’d taken control that night had set her body on fire. She’d convinced herself she could feel that with another Dom, but after months of interacting with other Doms, she learned that wasn’t the case. She didn’t just want a Dom. She wanted the one standing in front of her. “No. I haven’t changed my mind.”
Justin didn’t answer right away and she hadn’t missed that his left hand was still firmly on her ass. He didn’t seem inclined to remove it anytime soon. “Is Ali’s mom still living with her?”
She hadn’t been expecting the drastic subject change. “As far as I know, but I haven’t spoken to her today.”
He nodded, and to her dismay, he took a step back, separating them. Before she could ask what he was doing, Justin took her hand and led her off the dance floor.
Kim followed. Not that he gave her much choice.
Stopping a few feet away, he released her. “Katrina can print out a limits sheet for you to fill out. I believe Ali is in the lobby tonight. I’m sure she can help you if you have any questions.” The tone of his voice had become more serious, his demeanor more businesslike.
“Okay.”
“Are you free tomorrow morning?” he asked.
Again, she was somewhat thrown by his question. “I think so.”
He raised a single eyebrow.
Why did such a simple gesture from him make her want to squirm? “Yes. I’ll be free.”
Justin nodded. “Be at my house at ten. I’ll make us brunch and we can discuss our lists.”
“Can’t we just play like we did before?” she asked.
“No.” He ran his index finger along her jaw. His touch had the muscles in her stomach tightening again. “Before it was about you. Giving you a taste of submission.”
“And now?” Her question came out in not much more than a whisper.
“We will be testing your limits. Exploring. There will also be expectations. For both of us. It’s best to be on the same page before we begin.”
She was happy to hear he wasn’t fighting this thing between them any longer.
Justin brushed his hand down her arm as he stepped closer, invading her space once more. “I’ll give it one month.”
She blinked, not understanding what he was talking about. One month?
Her confusion must have been clear on her face. “If after a month we both decide we want to continue, then we’ll sit down with Mark and your parents.”
Kim swallowed, her nerves returning, but she nodded. This was what she wanted. Them. Together. She met his gaze. “Yes, Sir.”
He lowered his head, covering her mouth with his.
The kiss was chaste. Especially after what they’d done on the dance floor. But still, her body reacted. She wanted more. She always wanted more with him.
But before she could do more than release a quiet moan, he ended it. “Get the form from Mistress Katrina. Fill it out. Talk to Ali.” Justin lifted her hand to his lips, turned it over, and kissed her palm, sending a spark of heat up her arm. “I’ll see you tomorrow at ten and we’ll go over everything.”
He didn’t give her a chance to comment before he strolled over to the bar, returning to the seat he’d occupied most of the night before their dance.
Kim blew out a breath, trying to regain her bearings. Justin always made her feel off-kilter but centered at the same time. It was a strange feeling.
“Everything all right?”
The worried look on Daniel’s face pulled her attention from Justin. “Yes. I’m fine.”
“You’re sure? You appear worried about something.” The older Dom’s concern touched her.
She decided to be honest. “I am. A little. I need to get a limits list from Mistress Katrina.”
“Ah.” The side of Daniel’s mouth quirked up into a half smile. “I was wondering when you two would stop tiptoeing around each other.”
“You knew?” She and Justin had barely spoken since she’d joined Serpent’s Kiss.
“For those who were paying attention, it was hard to miss.”
Kim wasn’t sure how she felt about that.
“But if you’re looking for Katrina, she’s over there.” He pointed to the far side of the room.
Sure enough, Mistress Katrina was talking to a couple she’d seen several times before at the club. “Thanks.”
Daniel chuckled. “Don’t be nervous. We were all new at one point.”
He was right. And it wasn’t like Justin didn’t know her.
Kim shot him a grateful smile and made her way over to Mistress Katrina. She hung back, waiting for the conversation to wrap up.
When the couple walked away, Katrina turned her attention to Kim. “How can I help you this evening?”
For some reason, the woman was intimidating, but Kim stood her ground. She could do this. She dealt with intimidating people all the time at work. “I need a limits list.”
Katrina nodded, not seeming to be bothered that Kim’s request hadn’t been filled with confidence. “Follow me to my office.”
The club owner didn’t wait for Kim to agree. She turned on her heel and expected Kim to follow.
They made their way down a hallway off the main room to Katrina’s office. Kim had been there once before, and it still felt as imposing as it had that first time.
A large wooden desk that sat in the center of the room dominated the office. There were no windows, and on the one wall hung a variety of whips, floggers, and other implements. The first time she’d been in the room, she’d been so nervous she hadn’t paid much attention, but outside the items hanging on the wall, the room could have been any office in countless buildings across the city.
“Here you are,” Katrina removed several papers from the printer and handed them to Kim.
“Thank you.”
Katrina grinned. “I know you have Ali, but if you need help, or have any questions, let me know.”
“Thank you, again, Mistress Katrina.”
With the papers in hand, Kim left Katrina’s office and headed back to the main floor of the club. Almost immediately, she spotted Justin at the bar talking to Brandon. She thought about going to him but changed her mind. He’d told her to fill out her list and come to his place tomorrow morning. If she was going to be his submissive, then that meant learning to follow instructions. That wasn’t going to be easy for her, but this she could do. Clutching the papers to her chest, she exited the club and found her friend sitting behind the coat check reading a book.
Ali’s face lit up when she saw Kim, but then she must have seen how anxious Kim was and her excitement dimmed. “What’s wrong?”
Kim shook her head. “Nothing’s wrong. I-I need your help with something.”
“Did something happen?”
Instead of answering her friend’s question, Kim handed over the paperwork.
Ali’s happy expression returned the moment she realized what Kim had given her. She knew what it meant. Her friend had been a member of the club for a few years. A limit list wasn’t required if people wanted to do a scene together. That could be negotiated before the scene began. The limit list, however, was for those who wanted to enter a longer-term arrangement.
Before Ali could start asking questions, Kim decided to get it all out in the open. “And I need to tell you something else.”
Her friend’s delighted expression wavered. “You can tell me anything. You know that.”
Kim knew that and keeping this secret from her best friend had been eating at her.
She took a deep breath and went for it. “I slept with Justin.”