6
GRANT’S POV
What the hell had I just walked in on? Something was off, something was weird, there was an unusual atmosphere here, and I didn't know where it was coming from. No, that wasn't true––not true at all. Clearly it was coming from Cody and Billie as they exited the kitchen, heading to the backyard.
"Whoa, what the hell was that?" I asked Jasper as he turned back around to continue stirring the soups he'd been planning on all day long. "Drama, am I right?"
Jasper said nothing. He was a nice guy, but sometimes I found him a little too quiet. I never knew what was going on in his head, and it was very frustrating. I wanted to get to know him better, to see what was going on inside his head because then I felt like we would be able to build a connection.
When we shifted, and were both in our wolf forms, I felt better connected to him, but that distance was way too evident when we were humans.
"You okay, Jasper?" I moved closer to him, lured in by the delicious scent of the pots of soup. "You seem a little upset. Did they say something to piss you off?"
He shook his head a little too hard. Yeah, there was definitely some shit burning underneath the surface. How could I get him to confess all? He didn't even speak much to Phoenix, who he'd been stationed with in the military, so they had a previous connection before joining RedEye security agency. I wasn't sure what chance I stood at breaking down the barrier that seemed to be between us.
I reached forward and swiped at the soup, wanting a taste. What I didn't mean to do was splash some of the burning hot liquid all over Jasper.
"What the hell are you doing?" Jasper yelled, in a much louder voice than I'd ever heard him shout before. It kinda took me aback, to be honest. "Why did you do that? Oh my God, Grant, I've been working on this soup all day."
I wanted to chuckle lightly, but I didn't think this was the best time to aggravate him some more. Clearly, something had crawled up his ass, and I didn't want to push things further.
"Dude, it was an accident," I declared instead. "I didn't mean to. Man, you seem like you could use some Yoga and meditation to calm your mind."
I was a massive advocate of finding ways to calm the mind. It was something I loved to speak to others about––as well as suggest meditative techniques––as often as I could, especially with military men. PTSD was no joke for both wolves and humans alike, and there weren't anywhere near enough services out there to help. It was hard for me to work for RedEye and spread the word, but I did my best.
"I don't need anything to soothe my mind, thank you very much," Jasper growled back. "I just need you to keep your paws off my pots."
Shit, Jasper definitely sounded like someone who needed a calmer mind. But I wasn't about to push my agenda. I held up my hands in defeat, and backed away.
"Okay, well like I said, I'm sorry. If you need any help, let me know."
Yeah, there was no way that was going to happen. Not a chance in hell. All Jasper wanted was for me to vanish and leave him be. I took off for the gym and took to the weights. Much as I normally used Yoga to keep myself focused, sometimes I needed something a little heavier. Like right now. I just needed a moment of working my muscles hard to shut this shit out in my brain.
In the gym, I had a good view of Phoenix working with Joey on math. It was amazing how great he was with numbers. I did not have that ability at all. I was much better at focusing on physical education with Joey. I also enjoyed playing with the Lego as well. That might not have been algebra or whatever, but I was pretty sure it was just as important in a kid's life. Luckily, Billie seemed to think so too.
"Hey, when was the last time anyone went on a run around?" Phoenix suddenly asked me. "Would you mind just taking a check? Just a quick one?"
I had a feeling that Phoenix was trying to get me out of here so Joey could focus. That was fair enough. I probably was being a little too noisy. I nodded firmly and headed towards the perimeter. But before I got far, I caught sight of Billie and Cody, which stopped me in my tracks.
Ooh, what is going on here? Curiosity got the better of me. I had my suspicions that there was a lot going on, more than any of the rest of us knew about, which had me intrigued. I knew that I shouldn't have stopped to watch, but I couldn't help myself. Especially because the conversation was getting increasingly heated by the moment. I stepped back into the bushes and stared.
The yelling was evident. Billie was throwing her hands in the air in frustration, a side to her that I hadn't even seen yet. Her cheeks flamed red, she might as well have had steam pouring out of her ears.
Was she going to slap him? What would I do if I saw her slapping him? Would I probably just run off to avoid it all? Or would I get in the middle of it? I wasn't sure, I mean, this didn't seem like my fight at all. But I couldn't just...
Oh!All of a sudden, it didn't matter what I thought, because there was no hitting. Quite the opposite. Cody and Billie wrapped around one another as they kissed with a deep passion that practically exploded.
"Oh wow!" I breathed deep. "That's... wow!"
It shocked me, but I wasn't about to judge. Should I have been surprised though? Probably not. It was clear from the jump that there was something there between them. I did feel a little strange about it all though, but I couldn't put my finger on why. Maybe it was just because of the close proximity that we were all stuck in.
Anyway, I shook off the feeling, because truth be told, this had nothing to do with me. That was their deal. I had a job at hand, and it was something I needed to dive head first into the middle of right now. So, I backed off into the surrounding woodlands and shifted to my wolf form. I burst out my fur, exploding into my animalistic side, and immediately relief flooded me. Yoga and meditation did help calm my mind, but being a wolf felt much more natural––it was my true state of being.
I booked it because I enjoyed the animalistic speed. As I raced through the lush greenery surrounding the safe house, my nose sniffed at a million miles an hour. I picked up every single scent in the nearby surroundings and quickly found that there was nothing to worry about. The smells were all exactly the same.
We all shared the opinion that if anyone was going to attack the safe house, it would be at night. All the other attacks on members of Project Hammond had happened in the dark, the killers clearly trying to make use of the anonymity that came with the night time, so we upped our security when the sun set. But I agreed with Phoenix that it was a good idea to keep a lookout during the day as well. Like Stark always taught us, we could never be too careful. Members of RedEye on duty always had to be on top form.
But weirdly, this time as I ran, my brain wasn't only stuck on the five senses. I wasn't fully locked into my animal brain. Instead, I was thinking about the kiss I just witnessed, and the potential consequences that could come our way.
Awkwardness, weirdness, more tension, potential arguments...
But then what could I do about it? What right did I have to say anything? My own love life hadn't exactly been smooth sailing, had it? There was a reason I was still single because I developed feelings for all the wrong people at all the wrong times.
There was Olivia, my college tutor, who I was pretty sure did like me back, but her teaching position meant nothing could happen. That broke my heart. Then there was Laura, who I fell for hard, but she didn't want a long distance relationship and could not handle my military career. We broke each other's hearts when I told her I couldn't leave my job for her. That got really messy, really fast. My last mess was with Kia, but I wasn't sure I could be blamed for that one. She didn't tell me that she was married. I was left to discover that all on my own, which wasn't fun.
So, I couldn't blame anyone for falling for the wrong person.
Uh oh, I guess my real issue was the fear that I could have been making that mistake all over again. I would never have allowed that thought to enter my mind when I was human, because I knew it was wrong. But I couldn't control my wolf brain, and that side of me absolutely knew the reason there was a scratch in my brain over Billie and Cody. I'd had a bit of a crush on Billie ever since I first saw her.
I just thought she was fiery and beautiful. There was something entirely thrilling about her, something that lured me in, and I instantly wanted to know more.
But now, that opportunity was out the window, wasn't it? Because she had a thing going on with Cody. I couldn't get in the middle of that.
That was disappointing, but I suppose I would get over it. Of course I would.
Eventually, I made my way back to the house once I was absolutely convinced that I didn't have anything to report. Cody and Billie were nowhere to be seen. If I didn't have the image thoroughly scratched into my brain, then I might have been convinced that it never happened at all.
I quickly found Billie in the gym, struggling with one of the leg machines. She looked far too pissed off and wound up to be able to get anything done.
"Everything alright?" I suppose I could have just walked away because Billie didn’t look like she wanted to talk to anyone, but that just wasn't me.
"No, I'm just..." She threw her hands in the air in frustration. "I don't know. I have a lot of nervous energy that I need to blow off."
"I can help you," I offered. "I don't know if you've done much Yoga."
She shrugged her shoulders. "Not really, but I'm willing to try anything."
I led her outside the house to a corner of the yard where no one in the house could see us, just because I wanted to give her the space she needed to calm down. I laid out the Yoga mats and started to show Billie some of the moves. We started with the breathing exercises before moving into stretches.
"Oh yeah," she finally gasped out. "This is making me feel a little better."
"I knew it would. After an argument, it's always good to work out..."
She suddenly bolted up straighter. "What do you mean, argument? Did you see us? Oh God!" Her head fell into her hands. "Did you see me and Cody row?"
Uh oh! I accidentally overstepped a boundary right there. There was no point in lying at this point.
"I just caught wind of it, that's all." I shrugged and smiled regretfully. "Sorry, I left right away because I didn't want to intervene if there was something going on..."
"Nothing was going on." She snapped a little too quickly and sharply. Probably because I already knew that that wasn't the truth. But I wasn't going to get in the middle of things and confess that I knew more.
"Okay, don't worry. I don't have any..."
But she wasn't about to let me finish. The Yoga must have loosened her up a little bit because she sighed deeply and went on. "At least, there isn't anything going on between us at the moment. But, as I'm sure you know, we did work together a few years back, and there was something between us then."
"There was?" I was just surprised that Cody had managed to keep things to himself. He was usually such a gobby bastard. "Oh right..."
"Yeah, and it was quite intense as well." Billie practically deflated. "It was all in secret. We didn't want anyone to find out about us at the time. Looking back, it was definitely more of a physical thing than anything else. But seeing each other again... well, it's dragged up a lot of emotions. I think we were more special to one another than I realized, and now it's a little weird, isn't it?"
Whoa, that was heavy. I was definitely going to have to shut my little crush on her down if that was the case. Because this was real, and it seemed to involve some heavy emotions––maybe even love. My God, I had no idea how Cody felt about Billie, but it seemed like she was in deep. Really deep. Shit.
"It's okay," I told her calmly as I slung my arm around her shoulder. She welcomed the physical comfort, and leaned right into it. "It's going to be alright, you do know that, right? It's going to be just fine. It might not always be easy, but you and him will sort things out in the end. Cody is a good guy, and you're a great girl."
"Oh, sorry," she finally groaned. "I'm so embarrassed. I'm not supposed to tell anyone about this, and I've just spilled out my guts. You are just really easy to talk to, Grant. But please, don't say anything to anyone."
"Don't you worry. I'm good at keeping things to myself."
That much was true, and I hoped Billie knew that. I wasn't trying to dig around for information, so I could go around gossiping with the guys. I just wanted Billie to know that she had someone by her side who she could talk to about anything. This had to be hard for her, even if she was handling it really well, so I could be a shoulder for her to lean on.
It seemed it was even harder for her knowing that she had a complicated history with Cody. There was still so much that intrigued me about everything, and I kinda wanted to know what she was holding back. Was it a bad break up? Did more happen than she was letting on? There had to still be something sizzling there between them if they were kissing again... but I wasn't going to ask for more than she was willing to give. Instead, I focused on what I could do to potentially help her out.
"Did you want to work out some more?" I asked her. "Or are you done now?"
"Oh no, I want to work out some more," she insisted. "Can we?"
I thought that would be best for her, so I got to it. We pushed ourselves and tried some harder positions, really stretching our bodies to the limit. Billie wanted it, she needed something to take her mind off all the confusion circling around her.
Eventually, we were too sweaty, and it was time to give up. I didn't even think about it––I whipped my top off to try and cool myself down, which caused Billie to let out a little gasp of delight. Ooh, she liked to see my body, did she?
"Yoga has been working out well for you, hasn't it?" She winked. "I like it."
All of a sudden, there was a deep magnetic pull between us, one that seemed to come from nowhere. No, that wasn't it. It had been there all along, ever since I laid eyes on her. It was only now that I was giving it time and space to really envelop us.
Within seconds, we drew nearer to one another. We almost couldn't control ourselves, our feet were just bringing us closer by the second. Billie's eyes were all glazed over as intense desire caught hold of her. I just knew that I was looking the same way. I forgot all about Cody in that moment, her history with him, and everything that had happened. I forgot about absolutely everything.
It was just me and her. No one else even existed in the world.
By the time her hands connected with my cheeks, I was prepared for the explosion of fireworks in the pit of my stomach. Yet it was even more overwhelming than I thought it would be. The soft pressure of her lips pressed to mine was incredible. I couldn't get enough of this feeling, I wanted so much more.
I yanked Billie closer to me, and she let out the most adorable squeak. I didn't need to see the smile on her face to know that it was there, so I didn't need to check and see if she wanted this as much as I did. I crashed my lips back to hers and deepened the kiss, tasting every inch of her. It was electrifying, exhilarating, absolutely gorgeous. Just like she was. I couldn't push this crush to one side, could I? It was too powerful for words. I might have had inappropriate feelings for women I couldn't have in the past, but this was somehow much more, much deeper, and the kiss had only confirmed that.
Billie moaned as her hands traveled up my back. She kissed me back needily as her hands knotted in my hair, pulling off the hair band that I tie it with. Clearly, she did not want to let me go which was wonderful. Fuck, my pulse was absolutely racing, I was breathless, and flooded with desire. The butterflies in the pit of my stomach grew almost to the size of birds.
Her fingers pressed to my chest and slid down my body, thrilling me even more. She was heading towards where I was throbbing with need, and I knew that as soon as she connected with me there, I would lose it.
There would be no controlling the beast within me then.