It was all instinct. I’m still not certain if instinct guided me in error or not.
Seven years felt a small eternity when I agreed to Azazel’s bargain, but as I open my door and step through to find Briar curled up in my bed, I’m struck by the thought that it won’t be nearly enough time at all.
I stalk to the bed and sink to perch on the edge. Her eyes flutter open, and I’m not keen on the lurching in my chest when they focus on me and she immediately smiles. It’s a soft expression. Our faces are so different, our emotional tells so foreign to each other, but she’s not adept at hiding hers. Not when I look into her dark eyes.
My bride is happy to see me this morning.
I reach out and carefully sift my claws through her tangled hair. “You were dreaming last night.”
“Ah.” Immediately, her expressive eyes close down. “I would rather not talk about it.”
Which meant she was dreaming of him. I’ve never hated a stranger the way I hate Briar’s late husband. It’s an effort to keep my crest from flaring, to keep the hiss out of my voice. “Of course. But if you ever decide that talking might help, I’m here.”
“Okay.” She tentatively reaches up and runs her fingers along my forearm, almost as if she can’t believe she’s allowed to touch me. That lurching feeling in my chest gets worse. Briar clears her throat. “That bath last night was lovely, but I’m still going to be walking funny today. I am, uh, very sore.”
“Ramanu should be here shortly with a balm that will help significantly.” I only know how it works in theory, as the bargainer demons caretake their humans and don’t allow anyone else to participate. Now that I have Briar, I understand a bit more. I’m not the sharing type, but if I were, I would want to have the softer moments in the aftermath for me and me alone.
“Ramanu.”
She says it with such exasperation that I laugh. “Come, Briar. Let’s get you fed, and hopefully that demon arrives before too long. Do you want me to carry you?”
She opens her mouth, hesitates, and finally seems to make herself meet my gaze. “Is it terrible that I kind of like that you carry me?”
“If it’s terrible, then we’re both terrible.”
Briar smiles again. “I think I can make it to the bathroom alone, though.”
She does, though it’s mildly painful to watch her do it. I’m going to have to buy a vat of the healing balm if we’re to have sex anywhere near as often as I’d like. I close my eyes and focus hard to get my body under control in the wake of that thought. There will be time for that later. Right now, I have a bride to feed and take care of.
Strangely enough, the thought is just as pleasant as the idea of sex. More so, even.
Chapter 16
Briar
By the time I make it out of the bathroom, I’m ready to tell Sol that I was too rushed in agreeing to be carried. What am I, a princess waiting for her knight in shining armor? Walking is mildly painful, but I’ve dealt with worse for less pleasurable reasons.
He never gives me the chance.
Sol waits near the door as if he’s sure I’ll collapse the moment I step through, a luxurious robe hanging from his claws. It’s a deep green that matches the darkest part of his scales, and the material reflects the pale morning light in a way that makes my breath catch. He drapes it around my shoulders and waits for me to slide my arms through the generous sleeves. I belt it and shiver. The inside is even softer than it looks on the outside. Warmer, too. “Thank you.”
“I like you in green.” He sweeps me up into his arms without another word.
It feels different to be carried by him today. Now I know exactly what pleasure he’s capable of delivering. My body clenches in response to the memory of last night that cascades over me. Which makes pain throb between my legs. He really is massive, but even as sore as I am, I’m looking forward to doing it again. The sheer freedom of being with Sol, of not worrying that he’s judging or going to hold anything I say in a moment of need against me…and that he’s going to deliver pleasure. More pleasure than I could have dreamed possible.
What happened after the sex was just as revolutionary. He didn’t roll over and immediately go to sleep. Or, worse, leave. He took care of me. And then he slept next to me, his larger body curled around mine. It might not have been enough to stave off nightmares, but that would take a miracle at this point.