‘How old were you?’
He shrugged. ‘Eleven...twelve, something like that.’
Her eyes held his as she struggled to think of something positive to say. ‘But you get on with Guy?’
He shrugged. ‘When I was a child he more or less ignored me. Now I’m older I just avoid him. After my grandfather died he made a big scene about needing more money, so I give him an allowance and in return he has to be devoted to my mother—in public, at least. And discreet about his affairs. Or he’s supposed to be.’
Nola looked up into his face. There was nothing she could say to that.
‘What about your real father?’ she asked carefully. ‘Do you have any contact with him?’
His eyes hardened. ‘I know who he is, and since he knows who my mother is, he must know who I am, and how to find me. But he hasn’t, so I guess he’s even less interested in me than Guy.’
His face was expressionless but the desolation in his voice made her fists clench.
‘It’s his loss,’ she said fiercely.
He gave a small, tight smile.
‘Are you taking my side, Ms Mason?’
His words burned like a flame. Was she?
For months there had been an ocean between them. Then, for the last few days, she’d been fighting to keep him at a distance. Fighting to keep her independence. Fighting the simmering sexual tension between them. Her mouth twisted. In fact just fighting him.
Only now the fight had drained out of her, and instead she wanted nothing more than to wrap her arms around him, ease the desperate ache in his voice and that terrible tension in his body. Her breath seemed to swell in her throat as she reached out and tentatively touched his hand. For a moment he stared at her hand in silence, then finally he reached out and pulled her against him.
Burying her face against his body, she let out a shuddering breath. Being here in his arms felt so good, so right. If only she could stay this way for ever. But this wasn’t about her, it was about Ram—his pain and his anger, his past. A past that still haunted him. A past she was determined to exorcise now.
Lifting her head, she looked up into his face. ‘Your mother was so young. Too young. And she was scared and hurt and desperate. People don’t always do the right thing when they’re desperate. But they can do the wrong thing for the right reasons.’
Their eyes met, and they both knew she wasn’t just talking about his mother.
Breathing out shakily, he shook his head. ‘I’ve been struggling to figure that out for nearly twenty years. It’s taken you less than half an hour.’
She smiled a little. ‘It’s all those in-flight magazines I read.’
Mouth twisting, he clasped her face, his thumbs gently stroking her cheeks.
‘I’m sorry for what I did. Lying to you, dragging you off to the rainforest like that. It was completely out of order.’
Ram was apologising.
Her throat ached. She could hardly breathe.
‘We both behaved badly,’ she said shakily. ‘And we both thought the worst of each other. But I’m glad you did what you did, otherwise we might never have got this far.’
Her gaze fastened on his face.
‘But now we’re here, and I think it’s about time we started figuring things out. If we’re going to make it work, I mean.’
The words were out of her mouth before she even understood what it was she wanted to say. What it was she really wanted. Her heart began to beat fiercely as his grey eyes searched her face.
‘Make what work?’
It wasn’t too late. There was still time to backtrack. Ram couldn’t read minds, and she’d said nothing damning or definitive. But she didn’t want to backtrack—for wasn’t that their problem in a nutshell? Both of them looking back to the past, and in so doing threatening to ruin the future—their child’s future? ‘Our marriage,’ she said after a moment.
‘Are you asking me to marry you?’