“What?” I frown.
“He would tell me that he was working and tell Angelina that he was with me, but he would be out in clubs. Living the life of a crime boss, there were strippers, party girls, gambling and casinos. Gang bangs, orgies…you name it, he did it. And he did it well, every woman in Italy wanted him.”
I get a vision of that porno with Giuliano and those two girls and my heart sinks.
He loved it, he was in his glory in that threesome.
“And you can’t blame Giuliano for having those things…it comes with the territory. His men look up to him and I have no doubt that he loves you, my darling.” She smiles sadly as she runs her hand down my hair to try to soften her hurtful words. “But in time…he will stray. I can guarantee my life on it. And you will have his children and have no choice but to turn a blind eye to it, because the thought of living without him will kill you.”
I stare at her.
God.
“He will tell you he loves you and you will believe him. It is a long-drawn-out death of your own self-respect.”
“But I love him…” I whisper.
“I know. Men like him are easy to love.” I drop to sit on the couch and she sits beside me. “I’m sorry. I wish I could change the way things are.”
My eyes hold hers. “How did you do it, Mom? How did you love a man who constantly slept with other women?”
“Through tears,” she whispers.
I get a lump in my throat as I stare at her. “He’s different,” I whisper. “Giuliano is different.” Am I trying to convince her or myself?
Maybe a bit of both.
She presses her lips together and forces a sad smile, realizing her words are falling on deaf ears.
Only they aren’t.
I can hear her warning loud and clear.
It’s terrifying.
She straightens her back and stands, her steely armor slipping firmly back into place. “I will let you go.” Her high heels click as she walks to the front door and I follow behind her, lost in my own depressing thoughts.
She turns toward me. “Goodbye, darling.”
“How do Giuliano and I come out, Mom? How do we announce to the world that we aren’t related and are together?”
“Take your time with this decision, Francesca. Your happiness for the rest of your life depends on it. This is not something you want to rush.”
My eyes hold hers.
“If you do decide that this is the life you want, we will deal with it together.” She tucks a piece of my hair behind my ear. “You have my word.”
“Okay.”
She smiles and kisses my cheek. “I love you.”
I nod through tears. “I love you too.”
* * *
Anna and I walk into the restaurant around four p.m., I haven’t heard from Giuliano all day.
I have no idea what could be so important that he has to work on a Sunday.
The waiter shows us to our seats and pulls out our chairs for us. “Thank you.”
“Why are there so many guards today?” Anna whispers.
“What?”
“We had four cars on us as we drove here, didn’t you notice?”
I glance out the window to see Davidoff and three men standing on the sidewalk. “No, I didn’t.” I frown. “Probably Jules being overprotective again.”
She smiles. “What’s going on with you two?”
I stare at my loyal friend and I want to tell her everything, but my mother’s words are weighing heavily on my chest.
I feel confused and lost and I just want Giuliano to come home, he’s the only one who can make me feel better. I’ll wait another few days before I tell Anna about us not being related.
Mom is right, there is no rush.
“Nothing new, we are just friends,” I lie.
“Have you seen him since you got back?”
“No.” I roll my lips to change the subject, another lie.
I’m a shitty friend.
“So…tell me about Carlo?” I say to change the subject.
“Oh, Chesk.” She smiles dreamily. “He’s perfect. He took me to Tuscany and we laughed and made love and….” She gives me a subtle shake of her head. “I’m falling hard for him.”
I want to give her the same warning lecture that my mother gave me, but then I remember that I am in a worse off position than she is. “That’s great.”
“You know, we haven’t spent a night apart since I came home.”
I fake a smile as I listen to her.
“He’s just so…and the sex, God. I have been missing out all this time,” she gushes.
I giggle, I can sure relate to that one.
Her phone rings and the name Carlo flashes up on the screen. “Speak of the devil.” She answers. “Hi.” She smiles sexily. “Are your ears burning?”
She giggles as she listens to him speak, I can vaguely hear him. “Oh.” Her face falls. “Okay.” She listens again and smiles. “I’ll see what I can do.”