Those feelings always come afterwards. I always regret caving in to these feelings because they never lead anywhere good. We know this, I don’t know why it doesn’t hit me at the time. I get caught up in the passion and chemistry, I suppose. It goes along with any smarts I have. And I do have smarts. Honest!
“Right,” I practically whisper while I straighten myself back out again, trying to hide what just happened. “I suppose we should be getting back to the wedding. People will be wondering where we are.”
“Wait, Katherine…” Alistair calls, but the intimacy has gone, along with the nickname. I can’t stick around and listen to it.
No, it’s another long night alone for me while I ponder where my life went wrong. How did I end up with him again? Why do I have no self control? I need to stop that. This time it really can’t happen again, I’ll have to make sure of it.
3
Alistair
“Wow, mate, you look like you’ve been up all night.” I nudge Logan playfully. “Wedding night, huh?”
“I bet you had more of a ‘wedding night’ than me. The twins were a nightmare, over tired and cranky.”
I wince at that remark, wishing it were true. “Actually, you’ll be surprised to know it was me alone in bed last night.” Not that I wanted it to be. “I told you, I’m turning over a new leaf.”
“Yeah, I know that’s what you said. I just can’t work out why. What changed you?”
I smirk and tap the side of my nose. “A master never tells.”
“Hmm, well I still think it’s a woman, and soon I’m going to work out who.”
I can’t help myself. My eyes immediately dart across the room to where Katherine stands with Tamara. Almost as if she can feel my eyes upon her, she stares right back at me. I smile warmly at her, knowing that as much as I try to deny it even to myself, she really is shifting something inside of me. Maybe I am changing for her. There certainly isn’t any other woman in the world to capture the attention of my usually wondering eye. I kinda want to convey that to her, to tell he that she means more to me than just a hook up, that she’s my Kitty Kat…
But then she drags her eyes away, breaking the contact for us. I don’t miss the small frown before she does. My heart sinks. Why is she being this way? I know she’s controlling but this is something else. It’s more like she doesn’t like me at all. I know we have a major personality clash, but this seems extreme.
“I’m glad we have this brunch though, it’ll be good to catch upon all the gossip. I think we left earlier than everyone else in the hope that we could get the twins to have a good night sleep… obviously that didn’t happen.”
“Nah, everyone left pretty much after you guys did.” Well, everyone but me, but I was sad enough to stick around in the hope that Katherine would come back. She stayed far away from me, hiding in her room.” Sorry to tell you it got dull.” I laugh loudly and fakely. “You’ll probably get more gossip now.”
I follow Logan to the table and take a seat next to him, only realizing my mistake when I look up to see Katherine sat opposite me glaring as if I’m a criminal breaking into he home. All the color drains from her face.
“What the hell are you doing?” he hisses angrily, but quietly so only I can hear. “Why are you sitting there?”
What the hell is her problem? One minute she can screw me, the next she doesn’t want to be anywhere near me? I can understand that she doesn’t want to tell anyone about us but why has she got to be such a bitch?
“It’s a free country,” I shoot back childishly. “And I can sit wherever I want. You don’t control this.”
I know I’m pushing her buttons, confirmed by the color shooting back. Now she’s as red as a tomato and about to explode. I want her to blow up, I’d rather see that sort of emotion from her. It proves she’s human.
“Hey, you two!” Tamara’s sing song voice interrupts us. “What a nice morning, huh?”
Katherine glowers at me and I do her. I’m not going to be all fake and pretend everything is fine, we’re hiding enough as it is. I fold my arms over my chest and lean back with a snort. “Yeah, fucking marvelous.”
“Woah, what climbed up your butt, Al?” Tamara rolls her eyes. “I’m having a nice morning anyway.” She flicks her eyes between me and Katherine, sensing the tension rolling between us. “Are you two arguing again?”
“Nope.” I pop the P. “I’m not arguing, I just want to sit wherever the hell I chose.”
“That wasn’t what I said and you know it.” Katherine flings her arms above her head in frustration.
“Oh no?” I slam my hands down on the table, my eyes flashing with rage. “Sure sounded like it.”
“You always just assume things, you’re never going to change. It’s utterly ridiculous.”
“I’m never going to change? You’re the one being stubborn for ab
solutely no reason.”