“Leon.” She whispered his name, afraid that he would be ready to push her away again. After a few moments of silence, he stirred, moving in his chair to finally look at her with his sparkling dark brown eyes.
“Have you come to try and talk to me again, Ivy?” He asked her, and she had nothing more to say but remain silent.
“What is it?” He asked and turned away from her again. Now that he didn’t have his eyes on her, she felt like she could look at him better, she had found her voice again.
“I wanted to tell you that I’ve decided to leave.” Ivy said, clasping her hands together. She could feel her heart racing, she was afraid that he might be able to hear it too. Leaving this ranch, leaving Leon hadn’t crossed her mind seriously before this. And Archer had changed everything. She didn’t know if she could continue living like this, dancing around on tippy-toes, around Leon’s whims and fancies.
He breathed in deeply and trained his eyes on her again.
“I’m guessing it’s Archer. It’s Archer who has offered to take you away?” He said, in a low knowing voice. He didn’t sound angry and she was relieved. At least this might happen smoothly without another big fight.
“Yes, and I want to go to Minnesota with him.” She found the courage to tell him. Leon breathed in again heavily. He was taking his time to respond to her, while Ivy’s heart continued to race. She was afraid of her knees buckling from nervousness. Seeing Leon like this had reminded her why she was so attracted to him, why she had found him irresistible from the first moment that they had met.
“I don’t blame you.” Was all he said, several seconds later after having considered what she told him.
Ivy wondered if their little talk was over already. If Leon had any other questions for her, but he seemed to have fallen into his own silence again.
“I’m sorry.” She blurted out, not quite sure what she had to be sorry about, but she felt like that needed to be said.
Leon looked at her somberly, with tired eyes, like he was already exhausted with the conversation.
“Why are you sorry, Ivy? You’ve done nothing wrong. Archer is my brother, and I wish him well too. I hope the two of you are happy together.” He said, scratching his knee listlessly, almost like he was trying to find ways of occupying his hands. She had been avoiding his eyes till now, but Ivy looked him squarely now. She couldn’t believe that Leon was giving up this easily, that he wasn’t even putting up a fight.
“Yes, but I’m sorry because I feel like I’ve betrayed you by wanting to go away with him.” She said, a certain anger arising in her voice. Leon recognized it too, because he raised his eyebrows and continued staring at her. A smile was forming on his face, but this one didn’t melt her heart. This was a cruel smile.
“You don’t have to feel bad about that Ivy, I know you get nothing from me and your hope is that you’ll get something from him.” He said, and she felt her muscles stiffen. So, he wasn’t giving up without a fight. Leon was planning on ridiculing her decision, making her feel like she was silly and a young foolish girl.
She raised her chin up in the air and stuck out her jaw at him.
“I know he can give me more than you ever gave me.” She said, her breasts were now rising and falling with her heavy breathing. Leon’s half smile turned into a full one and he shook his head, like he was disappointed with a naughty child.
“What makes you think that? You’ve only known him for a few days.” He said, as calm as a cucumber, while Ivy felt like she was tearing up on the inside. Leon was self confident, he didn’t seem to be concerned by her decision.
“He’s been kinder, more attentive. He is willing to talk. He wants to talk to me.” She said angrily, more angry now that he was smiling.
Leon shook his head again, making her wince.
“I love my brother. I would do anything for him, so I’ll just keep my mouth shut now.” He said.
Ivy’s brows were crossed, she couldn’t quite understand what he had meant by that. If he was simply trying to provoke her.
“Leon, you should just be honest with me. I know you love him, but…” She said and he interrupted her.
“Sharing you was his idea, not mine.” He growled.
Ivy’s lips closed shut tightly when she heard the words. What was that supposed to mean? What was Leon trying to tell her?
“He was the one who wanted to share you with me. And I agreed because we had done it before. So, you’re right. He is more attentive, he is willing to go the extra mile to have you. You should be with him, he definitely wants you more.” Leon stood up now, looming over her, and she looked up at him, confusion darkening her face.
“So, you didn’t want to do it? Share?” She asked, trying to catch his gaze again. She could see that she was quickly losing him again. Leon was losing his interest in having this conversation. He wanted to return to his silent solitude again, but Ivy wanted answers.
“No, I didn’t. Not really. Not you. But Archer was insistent, he said you wanted it too. He said you slept with him because you wanted to be shared. And I couldn’t just deny you what you wanted. And I couldn’t give you up either. I was foolish.” Leon had covered his large hands over his face, and then he swooped them down, widening his eyes and running his fingers through his hair. She could see that this was an ordeal for him, that he didn’t want to talk about it any more.
“But Archer said that you shared all your girls, except Vivienne.” Ivy mumbled and Leon shot her a look.
“That’s right. We did. We do. But I didn’t want to share you. I was selfish, and greedy, and so you deserve to go with him. He is more open, loving and can give you what you want.” Leon said, and stepped to the side, he was making to go for the screen door but Ivy was quick to move, to intercept his path.
In the darkness, she leaned in towards Leon. She could smell his scent, his musky masculine smell that filled her lungs, reminding her how happy they were together in those weeks before Archer. How she hadn’t care how often Leon spoke to her, because she was the only person who existed in his world.