Not ever.
He.
Can’t.
Make.
Me.
He has this way of hypnotizing me. He’s like a magician wowing me and mesmerizing me with his bag of tricks. Well, he used to anyway. It’s different now. I’ve been the only audience member to watch his show for far too long now and I’m putting an end to it.
Right here.
Right now.
Jerking my head to the side and stepping to the left I move away from him. I keep my eyes closed and keep walking and walking and walking until I back myself into a corner. The wall feels like an ice cube against the back of my neck and I press my lips together to keep my teeth from chattering.
“What are you doing, love?” Damien asks, a spike of confusion in his tone.
I don’t respond verbally. Instead I shake my head. I should know better than to refuse him.
He follows me.
Always.
Once he told me he’d follow me anywhere.
He’s in front of me in a second, pressing his hips against mine and pinning me against the wall. He plants his nose in my hair. I inhale his familiar scent and I can feel my self-control collapsing. My eyelids flutter. My body relaxes. I fight the urge to plant my face in the curve of his neck and kiss his bare skin. “See,” he tells me, a hint of amusement in his voice, “I know you can’t resist me.”
Sometimes I hate it how he acts like he’s so sure of himself. When he acts like this, it makes me want to the opposite of what he wants me to. I have my own mind. I can think how I want to think. Do what I want to do. “Stop,” I say. My voice comes out shaky and breathless because I can feel my body betraying me.
He plants his lips against my ear and his fingertips slide up my hospital gown, resting on my upper thighs. “No,” he says in a low, flat voice.
Slowly, I’m succumbing to the madness of his touch. I shiver with want as his fingertips climb further up my thigh and dip beneath the band of my underwear. I tilt my head back, resting it in the corner of two of the four while wa
lls in my room and exhale when Damien places his moist lips against the curve of my neck.
This is not happening.
This is not happening.
Maybe before…
But not now.
I’m losing control of the situation and it’s driving me batty.
There’s a tug of war between my head and heart going on inside of my body. In the end, though, my head wins.
I wait until Damien backs away the slightest bit before crouching down in front of him. I pull my knees to my chest and scream. It’s a scream filled with angst and frustration. It is loud, piercing, and deafening and cause the metal bars to rattle against my lonely window.
Damien glares at me. “What are you doing?” There’s panic laced in the tone of his voice. “Addy, what are you doing?”
I stare up at him through a bevy of tear-stained eyelashes and scream again.
“You’re being ridiculous,” he snaps, raising his voice drown out my screams. “I am a part of you! Nothing is going to change that!”
I close my eyes tight when I hear the lock on my cell door click. Lowering my head, I rest it in between my knees to catch my breath. I open my eyes and notice a nurse that I don’t know making her way toward me.