She’d recall the purely physical reasons for the affair later, but not now.
He grabbed her hand once he’d gotten the little car up to the zooming speed that he wanted, his gaze focused on the road. She’d held it back fast, stealing glances at his profile, halfway amused by her inability to control her amorous behavior, halfway uncaring. How many nights like this happened in a girl’s life, anyway? Certainly only one in Emma’s so far.
He had to release her hand as he downshifted when they reached the Breakers. Sadness spiked through her intoxicated state at the idea of returning. She’d rather spend the night with him in his arms.
She looked over at him after he’d pulled the sports car into the garage and parked with almost mechanical precision.
He turned to her. It was the first time in hours that she’d looked him full in the face in the light. His solemn male beauty struck her anew. She resisted a strong urge to touch his jaw . . . sink her fingers into his thick hair. The realization that she still felt uncertain around him given her agreement to a purely sexual affair and what had just occurred on the beach sobered her.
“Can you stay?” he asked simply.
She was glad she’d crashed to earth before he said it, or else she’d undoubtedly have agreed. His allure was alarmingly potent.
“No. It wouldn’t be right. Not only because Amanda would worry, but because of work. It’s already wrong enough, what I did tonight . . .” she trailed off.
He took the keys out of the ignition, but didn’t move to get out of the car. He placed his wrists on the top of the wheel, his relaxed hands draping over it, his lean body slouching in that graceful, insouciant, but strangely ready manner that seemed so much a part of him. “It didn’t feel wrong,” he said after a pause.
“No. It didn’t.”
She saw his jaw working in the silence that followed. “We’ll go someplace nice next time.”
“You didn’t think tonight was nice?”
She couldn’t decide if his sideways glance at her was amused, disbelieving, or vaguely irritated.
“I did. Very. But you should expect more, Emma,” he said in that flat, authoritative tone that confused her at times. “I should have picked someplace more appropriate for the first time.” He shrugged. “I just couldn’t wait.”
“I’m a pretty good judge of deciding what I think is nice, and what I want and don’t want. Thanks.”
“I just meant you deserve something better.”
“Than your selfishness?” she couldn’t resist teasing him when he was so grave.
He glanced at her with hard incredulity. Despite her determination to lighten the moment, she resisted the urge to flinch at his stare. May as well face it, he was not a man used to being teased.
“I did exactly what I wanted to do tonight. Stop taking yourself so seriously,” she said, reaching for her car door.
He reached out and caught her hand. She looked around in surprise. Her eyes widened when she saw his blazing expression. His hand moved to the back of her head, cupping her to his palm in an increasingly familiar gesture. He brought her to him, seizing her mouth. He kissed her furiously. She’d thought the volcano of their passion had quieted for the night, but she’d been wrong. She felt herself submerged in the heat all over again. Arousal expanded at her core, an undeniable ache. He abruptly tore his mouth from hers and spoke next to her parted lips.
“Do you want to teach me how to lighten up, Emma?” he growled softly.
She swallowed with difficulty, her body vibrating with reawakened arousal. “I think someone should,” she managed.
“Fine. Then just be prepared for the darkness during the attempt.”
Her mouth fell open, but she wasn’t sure how to respond to his remark.
“I’ll come and get you tomorrow after you finish your shift,” he said.
She nodded. Then he was turning and getting out of the car. And Emma was cast right back into that churning sea of doubt and longing.
* * *
She slept in the next day until noon, only to awake to sunlight blazing through the miniblinds. It seemed to burn away the vestiges of her dreams—dark, erotic dreams that held her fast in its clutches, dreams that had nothing to do with the beauty of what had happened last night on that beach.
That was what she’d focus on, that indescribably moving experience. And she was going to see him again tonight . . .
She bounded out of bed and flipped open the binds, staring out onto a gorgeous July day. A day reserved for the young and healthy, she recalled Cristina saying. Emma wasn’t so sure about that, but it did feel like a wonderful moment to be alive. It was like everything was freshly minted, a golden sheen applied during the night. Amanda gave her a surprised look when Emma entered the kitchen humming cheerfully after her shower.