Esa’s breath popped out of her lungs. For once she couldn’t argue with her little sister’s logic. Sex and desire was as good a place as any to start something.
At least it was if the desire was based on honesty—
“I know you must like Finn, Esa.” Rachel interrupted her thoughts. “Otherwise you wouldn’t have blown a gasket when I said I’d gone to the party last night to find out if Finn would tell me more details about Julia’s extracurricular activities.”
“For your magazine,” Esa added with a frown.
“Yes, for Metro Sexy,” Rachel agreed with a stubborn tilt to her chin. “I am a journalist you know, and despite your high and mighty attitude, Julia Weatherell bedding down with other guys when she’s leading around Gavin Graves Jr. like she’s got a hook through his nose is big news. He’s one of the most eligible bachelors in the city, you know. Carla filled me in on all the details about her and Finn this morning when we met for breakfast at The Mighty Nice Café.”
Esa scowled, although she wasn’t really angry at Carla for breeching her confidence. It must have been obvious to Carla that Rachel was already in on the secret about Julia due to Finn’s mistaken phone call.
“Julia didn’t sleep with Finn. At least not recently. And under no circumstances whatsoever are you to bring up that incident in Finn’s condo in your gossip column,” Esa repeated what she’d whispered so heatedly last night.
“I told you I wouldn’t. Let’s turn back. The further we go the longer I’ll have to put up with you lecturing me.”
They walked silently for a half minute while Esa’s emotions frothed and boiled. She didn’t know why she was so furious at Rachel. Her sister’s behavior in this case wasn’t that different than it had been dozens of times in the past. She knew Rachel loved her with a fierce loyalty. Even if she did occasionally make Esa’s life a living hell, Esa loved her just as much in return.
“I hope you don’t sabotage the whole thing.”
Esa glanced over at Rachel in surprise. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Simple. Ever since you first started dating boys you were convinced that the really cute, nice ones didn’t like you. Even when they clearly were leching after you, you were always sure that at any moment they were going to fall for a slut or a skinny cheerleader.”
“That’s because they usually did.”
“Maybe a few of them did,” Rachel conceded. “There’s always going to be some rotten apples in the bunch. Doesn’t mean you should stop eating fruit altogether.”
“Profound analogy, Kitten,” she muttered drolly.
Esa suddenly felt exhausted when they turned up her parents’ driveway. Her fingers found her car keys in her jacket pocket. A heavy weight seemed to press down on her as she stared at her sedate sedan. A dependable car, luxurious yet conservative. A doctor’s car. The vehicle of a practical, reasonable woman.
“Are you sure you don’t want to trade again for awhile?” Rachel asked from beside her.
Esa swallowed the ache of longing in her throat. She hated to admit that she’d loved driving that fast little car. It seemed so juvenile of her, so out of character. And when she thought of the gift that Finn had given her, of flying swift and unhindered into the city last night with him by her side, she was so tempted to take her sister up on her offer.
Just like she was wild with a hunger to find out if this thing she had with Finn could be more than just a sexy fling.
“Absolutely not,” Esa said with a brisk fortitude she was far from feeling. She paused in the process of walking toward her car and glanced over her shoulder. “But thanks for asking, anyway.”
Rachel gave her a warm smile. “If you like Finn, don’t give up. The thing about a chance is that you’ve got to take it, Esa. Otherwise it’ll just become a regret.”
“There are no guarantees that it won’t end up being a regret if I do take a chance,” Esa said doubtfully, secretly thinking that maybe she’d already blown that chance.
“It’s not a sure thing, that’s true,” Rachel replied. “But just like Metro Sexy always reminds its readers, regret is guaranteed if you don’t try.”
As Esa drove down Lake Shore Drive ten minutes later—the experience notably less thrilling in her bulky, dependable car—she thought about what Rachel had said in regard to taking chances and regrets. She had to admit that Rachel’s advice sounded pretty darn sound, even if it did come from the mouth of a gossip columnist.
Chapter Sixteen
Finn frowned when he came home later and saw his neatly made bed. What had he expected, that Esa would still be there, warm and soft and naked? After the way he’d walked out on her earlier following her disturbing revelation?
Not bloody likely, he thought grimly as he tossed his keys onto the dresser.
He’d been restless and unsettled for the better part of the morning. What kind of a game was she playing, lying so blatantly about herself? he wondered for the thousandth time that day.
He scowled and started peeling off his clothes. What he needed was a good long run beside the lake followed by a workout at his gym. The exercise would help him clear his thoughts and give him the space he needed so he could stand back and examine the situation with Esa more clearly.
Maybe he should ask out another woman tonight. Or perhaps he’d take Caleb up on his offer and meet him at a sports bar this evening to watch the Ohio State-Michigan game. His fixation on Esa wasn’t healthy, Finn decided as he took the underground pedestrian tunnel beneath Lake Shore Drive a short while later. He’d just come out of a bad breakup. He hardly knew her.