I look away from him because no, I didn’t know that. That night in the cemetery and then again at the clubhouse—he never made a move to stop him.
“Kellan?” I can’t help but ask.
“I was testing him.”
“What does that mean?”
He runs a hand through his hair. “He wants you, Austin.”
“Yeah, dead like the rest of you.” I snort.
“No. He wants between your legs, sweetheart. Deke was baiting him. I had to follow through.”
My eyes drop to my hands on the wet concrete, avoiding his gaze.
He sighs heavily, and I glance up at him. He’s staring down at me. “Just know, I wouldn’t let anyone touch you, Austin. No one but me.” I’ve never seen his blue eyes so soft. And I hate that it makes me feel warm inside as if someone actually wants to protect me. It’s crazy to think of Cole that way. Maybe this is just another one of his games.
“I want you to tell me—”
“I don’t talk about it,” I interrupt him.
His jaw sharpens. “Why not?”
I laugh like that was funny. “Because no one ever cared,” I snap.
He gets up and walks over to me. Bending over, he grabs my hand and lifts it gently. I have no other choice but to climb out of the pool as he pulls me up. He cups my face and pulls my body flush to his, the water soaking his clothes instantly. “I care.”
“Why?” I ask nervously. “You’ve hurt me. I’m not gonna tell you something just for you to play some sick game with me.”
“It’s not like that,” he growls.
“Then what’s it like, Cole? Because I’m getting a headache trying to figure it out,” I snap.
He takes a step back, running his hand through his spiked hair. His white t-shirt and jeans cling to his body. “Just tell me one thing.”
“What?” I ask, rubbing my temples. Not lying about getting a headache.
“Your mother sent you here to protect you, right? So he couldn’t touch you?” His soft eyes meet mine, and I can’t make myself hurt him. Not after what he told me about the friend he couldn’t help. He didn’t have to say her name, but I know he was talking about Eli’s older sister.
“Yeah,” I say.
“Austin.” He grabs my arm and pulls me back into him. “You just lied to me.” His eyes narrow on mine.
Teeth clenching, I argue. “No, I didn’t—”
“Stop lying!” he interrupts me. “And tell me the truth, Austin!”
My anger rises that he can read me so well. And now that he knows, he’s never gonna give up. Cole is relentless. He does whatever he needs to get what he wants. “The truth? The truth is that she thought I dressed too provocatively around him. She didn’t like that I wore shorts in hundred-degree weather, and that he would stare at me when I walked through a room. She didn’t like that my jeans weren’t two sizes too big. She blamed me every time he touched me.” Angry tears sting my eyes. “She blamed me when she found me cornered in the kitchen and his hand up my shirt,” I scream, shoving him away. “She blamed me when she found him passed out drunk lying in my bed while I was out with my friends.” He stares down at me, his blue eyes dark and jaw sharp. “Is that what you want?” I shout and shove him again. “You wanna know that no matter what I did to stop him, it was never enough for her?” I gasp for a breath. “She didn’t care that I didn’t come home. She didn’t want me there anyway. That’s just what she wanted my father to believe. She didn’t care that I did drugs. She was the one who gave them to me. And she didn’t fucking care one thing about me.” The first tear falls down my cheek, and his blue eyes follow it.
He swallows. “Austin …”
“She didn’t care, Cole.” My voice cracks. “You were right. Is that what you want to hear?” I’m shaking, hating to admit that to him. “She chose him over me.”
He steps into me and wraps his arms around my waist. I bury my head into his soaked chest and bite my bottom lip to hold in a sob. To keep my emotions in check.
His arms tighten around me. “I’m sorry.” He breathes, kissing my hair.
The sincerity in his words makes me fail miserably. Fifteen years of silence rushes out like a dam breaking. And of all people to tell, I tell the one guy who can use it against me. He didn’t deserve the truth, but a part of me wanted someone to care for so long. Someone to tell me she was in the wrong. And that I mattered.
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
COLE
She sobs into my shirt, and I just stand here, holding her. Not knowing what the fuck to do for her.