PROLOGUE
HE HATED hospitals.
Ben MacAllister stared at the bold red sign for the Accident and Emergency unit and wondered what on earth had possessed him to take the job. It had been a moment of weakness and one which he was already bitterly regretting.
What the hell had he been thinking of?
He could have stayed in the clinic in Pakistan where they were desperate for doctors with his skills, or he could have done what he'd been promising himself for ages and taken a year off and travelled.
In fact, he'd had any number of options, all of. Which were considerably more appealing than the one that he'd chosen.
With an impatient sigh, he strode across the car park to the entrance. If he didn't get himself inside the building soon he'd be climbing back into the car and driving back the way he'd come.
Forcing himself to move, he strode through the swing doors and stopped dead as the memories came rushing back. The smells, the noise, the bustle...
That one awful day that had changed his life.
Sweat broke out on his brow and he gritted his teeth to stop himself running.
This was never going to work.
He was about to turn and go back the way he'd come when his oldest friend came striding through the swing doors towards him, stethoscope looped round his neck like a tame serpent.
'Ben—great to see you!'
'Nicholson.' He clasped the hand that was offered, aware that his brief chance for escape had vanished, 'How are you?'
'Relieved to see you.' Sean Nicholson shot a telling glance towards the crowded waiting room. 'Where do they all come from? I'm trying to run this department with zero staff at the moment so you're as welcome as alcohol on a stag night. Let's go to my office and talk.'
Ben reluctantly kept pace as the other man led him down the corridor into a small office which overlooked the car park and the mountains beyond.
Sean waved a hand at a chair buried under a mound of papers. 'Move those files and sit down.'
Ben paced over to the window and stared outside, feeling some of the tension in his body dissipate as he stared at the snow-capped mountains. It always soothed him to be in the mountains. It was a reminder that there was a world outside if things got too bad within the hospital. 'Nice view.'
Sean smiled. 'Being the senior consultant comes with some perks. It's not the Himalayas, but we like it.' His smile faded. 'You stayed away too long. You look like hell, MacAllister.'
'Thanks.' He should have been offended by Sean's blunt comment, but he wasn't. After all, it was true. He did look like hell.
And he didn't want to be here. It wasn't going to work.
Sean's voice was rough but there was sympathy in his blue eyes. 'You needed to come back, Ben, and. you know it.'
'Is that what this is all about? Rehabilitation?' Ben’s tone was weary and his mouth tightened, 'When you called, you told me that you were desperate for doctors.'
'I am desperate,' Sean said calmly, 'You have no idea just how desperate I am. I'm trying to run a department on fresh air at the moment. Having you here helps alleviate the problem and it makes my wife feel better.'
The expression in Ben's eyes softened slightly at the mention of Sean's wife. 'How is Ally?'
'Worried about you,' Sean said frankly. 'She wants you close by so that she can help.'
Ben's expression was unreadable. 'So basically you're interfering?'
'Well, it's time someone did.' Sean met his accusing gaze head on. 'It's been two years, Ben.'
'And what's that supposed to mean?' Ben's eyes glittered dangerously. 'Is two years some sort of magic figure? Am I supposed to feel better just because it's been two years?'
Sean sighed. 'No. But it's time you stopped running.' He hesitated. 'And maybe it's time you talked about what happened.'
'Why the hell would I want to do that?'
Sean looked him in the eye. 'Because sometimes it helps to talk?'
Ben threw back his head and laughed. 'That's rich, coming from you! When have you ever talked about your feelings?'
Sean rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. 'I talk to Ally.'
Ben lifted an eyebrow. 'You're offering to lend me your wife?'
'I'm offering to lend you her listening skills. Ally wants you to come and spend some time with us.'
Ben's mouth tightened. 'You can tell Ally not to meddle.' But he knew she meant well. He was very fond of Sean's wife who was mature and sensible and knew exactly what she wanted out of life.
Unlike some women.
'You can tell her yourself,' Sean said crisply. 'She wants you to come to dinner as soon as you're settled in.'
Ben digested this information. 'Don't tell me—she's inviting a spare woman?'
Sean fiddled with some papers on his desk and avoided eye contact. 'I'm not involved with the guest list. I just turn up and eat the food.'
'Sean!' Ben's tone held a warning note and Sean sighed and raked a hand through his hair.
'All right, there's a possibility that she's matchmaking...'
'Possibility?'
Sean shifted uncomfortably. 'Probability. You know Ally.' He gave a shrug. 'It doesn't mean anything.'
Ben gritted his teeth. He had no intention of being set up. 'Forget it.'
Sean sighed. 'It's only dinner! Dinner, and one available woman to talk to. It's not as if you hate women—or are you trying to tell me that you've been celibate for the past two years?'
Ben chose to ignore that question.
'I'm not interested.'
'Oh, come on!' Sean gave a disbelieving look. 'I knew you in medical school remember? Women get cricked necks when you pass them in the street. You had more girlfriends than—'
"That was a long time ago.' Ben interrupted him with a grim expression on his face. "Things have changed.'
He'd changed.