“Your cat doesn’t like you? How come?”
I shrug. “I don’t know. He’s very mean though and I think about telling him to pack his kitty bags and move out.”
“Where is he now?”
“He’s in Los Angeles where I live. I have a housekeeper that will feed him while I’m gone.”
“Where does he sleep?”
Odd question coming from a boy. “He has one of those cat palace things. Maybe that’s why he hates me – because it’s a palace and not a race car or something like that.”
Listening to Noah laugh has quickly become like music to my ears. I want to record it and listen to it over and over while I write. Looking at him inspires me to write about him, capture him in song.
“So, what about you? Do you have a girlfriend, wife or a cat that hates you?”
“No, I don’t have any of those. My mom says that maybe after her and Nick get married we can get a dog.”
Married? I bite back a string of slurs that want to fly out of my mouth when he talks about Nick and Josie. I know I can’t say anything. I gave her up, but I won’t lie and say it doesn’t hurt to see her with someone else. I don’t know what I expected, maybe for her to be miserable and as lost as I am.
CHAPTER 10
JOSIE
I never thought I’d see this day. I’ve had many dreams of the day Noah would meet Liam, but never like this. I resigned myself to thinking Noah would look up Liam when he turned eighteen. They could fight or bond or do whatever it is fathers and sons do when they first meet each other. The only thing I didn’t want was for Noah to hate Liam for not being around. I could’ve tried harder to tell him, but I didn’t. I was selfish and wanted to hear his voice. I wanted him to hear my voice and come home. I was angry and it took me a long time to get over that anger.
Now watching them outside, deep in conversation I want to wrap them up in a tight bubble so they can never be away from each other. I know that’s not fair to Liam – he has a life away from here that’s vastly different. He’s different, yet so much the same boy that I fell in love with all those years ago.
The boy I never stopped loving.
Looking at Noah and Liam side by side, there’s no denying they’re son and father.
Liam keeps eye contact with Noah each time they talk. I know Nick is pissed that Liam is here and honestly so am I, but what can I do? Noah knows who Liam is from living in Beaumont. He just doesn’t know who he is and I think I want to leave it that way, at least for now. Liam will be gone soon and we’ll all go back to normal.
“What are you thinking?” Katelyn rests her head inside the crook of my elbow. Her small, five-foo
t-two frame that doesn't quite reach my shoulder allows me to wrap my arm around her, pulling her closer.
“I’m not sure,” I say. “There are too many emotions flowing through me.”
“He looks just like him,” she says keeping her voice low and away from prying guests. “What are you going to do?”
I shake my head because I don’t know. I haven’t a clue what I should do. My brain is saying ignore it and Liam will go away again, but my heart is telling me to go out there and demand that he be part of Noah’s life. It’s the least he can do since he’s been absent for the past ten years.
“He’ll be gone soon. Maybe I’ll just let him call the shots.”
“Not too soon, sweetie. He’s watching football with Peyton on Sunday. A lot can happen in three days.” Katelyn kisses me on the cheek and leaves me to stare out the window at two of the three boys that own my heart.
The drive home from Katelyn’s was quiet. Nick held my hand and Noah fell asleep before we pulled away from the house. He spent the rest of the day talking to Liam about stats and perfect field position while Nick watched from the sidelines. I know there were a few snide remarks made to Nick, but he brushed them off.
“What are you thinking about?” Nick asks as he slides into bed. He props himself up on his elbow, clearly ready to discuss everything that has happened today. I just want to go to bed.
“You know Katelyn asked me the same thing earlier. She was more concerned about me when I should’ve been taking care of her.”
“She knows you love her.” He places his hand on my waist, bunching my silk pajamas into his fist. “Today was…”
“Difficult, sad, not expected, odd. I could go on and on, but nothing really sums up what today was. A clusterfuck, maybe?” I shift closer to Nick and he brings his arm around me, pulling me closer. His lips trail down my neck until he reaches my lips, kissing me softly.
“We should talk about Liam and Noah. I know I’m not Noah’s dad, but I want to be, you know this. I was wrong for the way I acted today, so very wrong for lashing out at you about Liam and I’m sorry.”