I ended the call without saying anything else and rushed into the hall. Travis had his hand on the front doorknob. How had he moved that damn quietly?
Because he’d learned to. Because he’d fucking had to. Why hadn’t he run from Rob? Anyone in my family would have helped him, especially me. Maybe he thought we wouldn’t have after what he’d done to Beau. Why hadn’t he left before then? I was going to find out. I wanted the whole story, but I knew I had to go slowly and carefully to get it.
“Where are you going?” I asked.
“Home.”
“And where’s that? You said you lost your apartment. Are you going back to the bayou?”
He shook his head. “I’ll figure something out.”
“You’re not leaving.”
“Dax.”
“No. You’re going to come in here and talk to me.”
“Or what? You’ll torture me until I do?”
Fuck. Did he really think I would hurt him? “You’ll always be safe with me, but I’m not letting you leave.”
“I’m not your prisoner.”
“No, you’re my responsibility.”
Travis huffed. “That’s worse.”
What the fuck did that mean? “How?”
“If I’m your prisoner, then you want to keep me. If I’m your responsibility, I’m just a fucking burden. Goodbye, Dax.”
He reached for the door again, but I grabbed his arm and swung him around. “Travis, I’m not fucking kidding. I won’t allow you to just disappear.”
“Why? Because you’d have to answer to Beau?”
“I can handle Beau. I don’t want you to get hurt. Do you really have a safe place to go?”
The fear in his eyes told me he didn’t. “Come in and let me explain what you heard.”
“Dax, I know what you do. I’m not worried about that.”
“What I do?” Did that mean he’d only heard the last words I’d said and not what I’d said about Rob.
“I know about your family business, and I understand your role in it is… violent.”
Violent hardly described the things I did. “I want you to feel safe with me, so I’m going to explain anyway. Then if you still want to leave, I’ll find somewhere you can stay. I know most people can’t accept what I do.”
“What you do keeps people safe, doesn’t it?”
Did he mean that? Did he really see it that way? There were times I fucking enjoyed extracting information from our enemies. I let myself revel in that sick desire to hurt, to maim, to kill because it served something greater. I’d never tortured or killed anyone who was a decent human being, and that was why I could live with what I did and stay sane. Maybe that was why Ambrose struggled with what he’d done in the army. He’d had no way to know the true character of the enemies he’d killed.
No matter how much I justified it, most people couldn’t stomach what I did. Even other criminals shied away from those of us who did the most gruesome jobs.
“I make sure we get the information we need. Sometimes that helps keep the people I love safe. Sometimes that helps us keep our business going.”
“You wouldn’t hurt somebody who wasn’t evil.”
Travis speaking with such conviction made something flutter in my chest. “Most people say I’m evil.”
“I don’t.”
“Then why are you trying so hard to run away.”
“Because if I stay on…” He paused and licked his lips, keeping his eyes cast down at the floor.
I took hold of his chin and tilted his head up, forcing him to look at me. The heat of his skin seemed to burn my fingers, and I almost let go from the shock of it. This was wrong, so very wrong.
“What will happen if you stay?”
He shook his head. “I need to be on my own. I need to make my own start.”
“You’re in danger.”
“I’m always going to be in danger.”
“Not with me watching out for you.”
He shook his head. “That’s not your job.”
“Then whose is it?”
He stepped back, freeing himself from my grasp, but he didn’t try to leave again. “Nobody’s. I got myself in this fucking mess.”
“No, you didn’t. Rob got you in this mess.”
“I wanted Rob.”
“You wanted things Rob promised you.”
“You don’t know anything about it.” He tried to step around me, but I blocked his path. “Move, Dax. You don’t want to get involved in my problems.”
I could tell how hard he was trying to keep himself together. Had he ever been able to relax in the years since Rob had manipulated him? “Whether I want to or not, I already am.”
“What the fuck does that mean? You don’t even know what’s going on with me and you don’t need to. Just let me walk away.”
“What about Beau? He said he’d come over later today. He wants to talk to you.”
Travis shook his head. “No, he doesn’t. He just feels like he has to. He doesn’t want anything to do with me.”
“You don’t know that. You don’t know what he’s thinking.”