"Sammy and me . . . Frank R too . . . the heists--the truck-jackings. We got nailed. In a big way." His voice is shaking. She's never known him to cry but it sounds like he's a few seconds away from bawling his eyes out.
"You're on the bag?" she gasps.
He stares at her green carpet. Finally a whisper: "Yeah . . ." Though now he's started the confession, he doesn't need to pull back. "But it's worse."
Worse? What could possibly be worse?
"We were the doers. We jacked the trucks ourselves."
"You mean, tonight, you . . ." Her voice has stopped working.
"Oh, Amie, not just tonight. For a year. The whole fucking year. We had guys in warehouses tell us about shipments. We'd pull the trucks over and . . . Well, you get it. You don't need to know the details." He rubs his haggard face. "We just heard--they've issued warrants for us. Somebody dimed us out. They got us cold. Oh, man, did they get us."
She's thinking back to the nights he was out on a set, working undercover to collar hijackers. At least once a week.
"I got sucked in. I didn't have any choice. . . ."
She doesn't need to respond to this, to say, yes, yes, yes, my God, we always have choices. Amelia Sachs doesn't offer excuses herself and she's deaf to them from others. He understands this about her, of course, it's part of their love.
It was part of their love.
And he stops trying. "I fucked up, Amie. I fucked up. I just came by to tell you."
"You going to surrender?"
"I guess. I don't know what I'm going to do. Fuck."
Numb, there's nothing she can think of to say, not a single thing. She's thinking of their times together--the hours on the range, wasting pounds of ammo; in bars on Broadway, slogging down frozen daiquiris; lying in front of the old fireplace in her Brooklyn apartment.
"They'll look into my life with a microscope, Amie. I'll tell 'em you're clean. I'll try to keep you out of it. But they'll ask you a lot of questions."
She wants to ask why he did it. What reason could he possibly have? Nick'd grown up in Brooklyn, a typical good-looking, street-smart neighborhood kid. He'd run with a bad crowd for a while but had some sense smacked into him by his father and gave that up. Why had he slipped back? Was it the thrill? Was it the money? (That was something else he'd hidden from her, she realized now; where'd he been socking it away?) Why?
But she doesn't have the chance.
"I've got to go now. I'll call you later. I love you."
He kissed the top of her motionless head. Then out the door.
Thinking back to those endless moments, the endless night, time stopped, as she sat staring at the candles burning down to pools of maroon wax.
I'll call you later. . . .
But no call ever came.
The double hit--his crime and the death of their relationship--took its toll; she decided to quit Patrol completely. G
ive it up for a desk job. It was only the chance meeting with Lincoln Rhyme that pulled her back from that decision and kept her in uniform. But the incident sealed within her an abiding repulsion for crooked police. It was something that was more horrific to her than lying politicians and cheating spouses and ruthless perps.
This was why nothing would stop her from finding out if the St. James crew was in fact a circle of bad cops from the 118th Precinct. And if so, nothing would stop her from bringing down the crooked officers and the OC crews working with them.
Her Camaro now skidded to the curb. Sachs tossed the NYPD parking identification card onto the Chevy's dash and climbed out, slamming the door fiercely as if she were trying to close a hole that had opened between the present and this hard, hard past.
"Hell, that's gross."
In the upper floor of the parking garage where the Watchmaker's SUV was found, the patrol officer who made this comment to his colleagues was looking down at the figure, lying on his belly.
"Man, you got that one right," one of his buddies replied. "Jesus."