Weight–Pork belly status.
Medical Conditions–old stinky farts.
I wasn’t being totally facetious, but all these questions weren’t something I could exactly answer, and I wished I hadn’t taken this job once I realized the responsibility it entailed. I’ve never kept anything alive before, let alone a cactus plant which is supposed to be un-kill-able. With a flourish I didn’t feel, I signed my name and perhaps Pumpkin’s fate. I might be knocking on heaven’s door if this didn’t work out. If anything, I’d be lucky if my pet sitting abilities didn’t rip apart our family with my crappy luck and poor survival skills.
2
Chase
“Dr. Calloway, are you busy? The acupuncture appointment is finally here.” My vet tech slash receptionist poked her head into my office.
If by busy you mean squeezing the anal glands of a German Shepherd, then yes, I’m currently up to my latex gloves in some shitty business.
“Dr. Calloway, the late appointment is here.” Sharon tapped her foot with what I assumed was annoyance over the last appointment of the day. She only repeated herself when I ignored her which was a goodly part of the time. I nodded that I would be right out once I finished up in here. Oh, the glamorous perks of being a veterinarian. I applied enough pressure to ease the blockage, and Cosimo looked up from the table at me, whining.
“I know, buddy, almost done.”
The dog laid his head back down, expelling a deep breath. It was an unpleasant, but necessary procedure to prevent infection and illness. Cosimo’s owners probably didn’t want the eighty-pound dog scooting across their carpet either, not that I could blame them.
I pulled off the surgical gloves and put them in the trash, buzzing Sharon to come back and return Cosimo to the aftercare pen until his owners came to pick him up.
She knocked at the door a second time and three dogs came rushing in, tails wagging, panting hot breaths against my legs. I tried to recall the last female who reacted that way at my knees but sadly came up short. The last remotely exciting memory was spring break in college circa to many years ago.
“All right, Precious is here.” Sharon closed the door while I still faced the counter, getting all the needles out for the acupuncture procedure from the cabinets above the sink.
I heard someone clearing their throat and turned around, expecting old lady Helen and her menagerie. Instead, I was pleasantly surprised to see a young woman who looked a bit disheveled trying to control the excited dogs.
Hello, beautiful disaster.
“Whoa, Roswell! No! Bad dog!”
A small pug jumped my dress pants, a little too excited to see me. Slim hands with pink nails pulled the little dog back. The Husky wooed loudly, clearly offended by the chaos, and the Basset Hound woofed, his too long nails clicking on the tile floor.
“It’s all right, I’m used to it.” Nothing like a dog humping my leg to make the day go by.
“Oh God, I’m really sorry. He’s kind of a little shit. I forgot my aunt keeps refusing to get him fixed.” She held the wiggling pug with an ugly face only Helen could love and a sharp bottom tooth sticking out giving him an even homelier half vampire look.
“I’m Dr. Calloway.” I held out my hand to introduce myself and instead of her palm she handed me the dog. The little shit Roswell wiggled as I scratched gently behind his ears, earning me a foul smelling lick. I checked his teeth for plaque buildup but found none and put him down to wander around the room.
“I’m sorry. I’m Helen’s niece and I’m pet-sitting this summer. Clearly, I have no idea what I’m doing.”
Chuckling, I looked her over appreciatively. I didn’t usually check out the owners of my patients, but Helen had been coming since I opened the vet clinic in town and her niece-name
-unknown intrigued me. She looked bowled over, windblown, and covered in dog hair against her black Lululemon yoga pants and tank top my sister Kristen would envy. Perky breasts swelled over the top and the edging of a nude lace bra peeked out. The dogs barked, distracting me from my perusal.
“Down, Bailey. Sit, Roswell.” Using my firmest tone, the dogs all sat on the floor, complacent tails wagging.
“Oh wow, that is the best trick ever. They never do that for me.” Nameless girl put her hands on her hips, looking annoyed, and I was guessing the dogs had been giving her a run for her money, making her earn every penny of pet-sitting pay. She was exotic looking with tiny curves that packed a gut punch with her dark hair and almond-shaped eyes over a pert nose. I wondered about her background because I was curious. It was like the way chocolate shouldn’t have wasabi on it, and yet if you gave it a chance you’d taste the sweet heat. She reminded me of a girl I dated in veterinary school. That relationship hadn’t worked out for a bunch of reasons, but it was fun while it lasted and we parted amicably.
“So…does Helen’s niece have a name or are you Precious?” I watched her skin blush with my inappropriate joke, and she shook her head no. I could kick myself for the incredibly lame and forward question after it left my mouth.
“Definitely not. Pumpkin here, aka Precious, is getting acupuncture, which is not my thing.” The Basset Hound, upon hearing his name, woofed loudly.
“So what may I call you then?”
“My name is Winnie.”
She was definitely not a Winnie from The Wonder Years. Pretty in a refined sort of way. Expensive clothes, accessories, and a haughtiness that came with her snappy attitude reminded me of a city girl out of her element. It was a contradiction to the vortex of chaos she arrived with, and I found that curiously endearing.