Everything he told her weighed heavily on her heart. He’d lied to her from the beginning. He had his own horse farm, he was a racehorse mogul.
Which meant he had money. Plenty of money and he was used to getting his way. Which would explain his take-charge attitude, his beautifully appointed home, the doctor who made house calls, no doubt because Nash had paid her a hefty sum.
There was no way to describe the level of hurt that spread through her, leaving her cold, empty. Everything she’d known...no, everything she’d felt had been a lie based on nothing but a man who was only looking out for himself. Anything she felt was for a man who didn’t even exist...except in her heart.
“You bastard,” she whispered, hugging her midsection. She refused to look at him, she wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of seeing her broken.
“My name may be different and my bank account bigger than you thought.” Nash’s bare feet shuffled across the hardwood floor as he came closer. “But I’m still me, Lily. I’m still the man who wants to be with you. I’m still the man who fathered that child.”
His palm cupped her chin, lifting her face so she had no choice but to look him in the eyes. “I’m still the man who loves you.”
There was no way to stop the tears from spilling over. She didn’t even try. She hadn’t wanted him to see her vulnerable, but she’d quickly changed her mind. He deserved to see the results of his lies, his betrayal. He deserved to hurt just as much as she was hurting. If he loved her so much, then she’d hate to see how he treated his enemies.
Swatting his hand away, Lily pushed off the back of the couch and stood straight up. “Don’t touch me. Never touch me again. You don’t love me, you love yourself. I don’t think you’re capable of loving me, Nash...or whatever the hell your name is.”
She’d thought being deceived years ago had been bad, but this was a whole new level of crippling pain.
She’d take public humiliation any day over having her heart shattered into so many pieces she feared she’d never find all the shards. She’d been so sure she could trust him with everything.
“Hear me out.”
“No.” There was no way she would listen to more lies. “I’m done here. You had ample time to tell me the truth, but you started everything off with a lie.”
Her heart ached and she feared the cracks and voids would never be filled.
“You want to know what’s worse?” she asked, her words wretched out on a sob. “I still love you. Damn you, I can’t just turn off my feelings. I can’t be cold to someone I care about and I never thought you’d be so heartless to me. How dare you make me feel again, make me think I could trust you after you know what I’ve been through? How dare you make me love, make me believe in a family I’ve wanted for so long?”
Nash’s eyes shimmered and Lily had to steel herself from feeling any pity. She had no room in her heart for him...not anymore.
“Please, Lily.” He started to reach for her again, but as soon as her eyes darted to his hand, he dropped it. “I’ll do anything to make this right. Anything so you can see how I’ve changed since we started seeing each other. You need to know that you are the reason I changed, the reason I told everyone the truth. I did it all because I love you. I want to be with you with nothing between us. Tell me what I can do, I’ll do it.”
Even hearing him pour his heart out, bare his soul, Lily couldn’t trust that what he said was true. How could she? For months he’d found it so easy to lie. Not only to lie, but to sleep with her, make a baby and pretty much set up playing house, all while lying straight to her face.
He was used to getting what he wanted and now that she was done, he was pulling out all the pretty words he thought she wanted to hear. Nothing could fix what he’d done, what he’d destroyed.
“I can’t be here.”
She pushed him out of the way and headed toward the foyer. She’d just scooped the keys to her rental up off the entry table and placed her hand on the knob when Nash, Jake...whatever, placed his hands on either side of her head and caged her against the door.
The warmth of his chest against her back had her sucking in her breath. Damn her body for responding to his nearness. Her heart was broken, but her hormones hadn’t received that message.
“We can work this out,” he whispered in her ear. “I can’t lose you.”
Lightning illuminated the sky, the electric flickered, once, twice. Darkness enveloped them, the silence mocked them. There was a time they would have made use of this raging storm, the power outage. Right now, though, they were strangers, back to square one. Because she definitely didn’t know this man standing so close to her she could feel the breath on her cheek.