“It’s hard. I’m used to kissing you when I want to.”
His gaze moves to my lips, and I think I made Killian Hendrix blush.
I like it.
Chapter 6
Killian
I stare at this girl, Liri. My girlfriend. I’m tempted to just grab her and kiss her to see if I can remember her, but I don’t want to give her false hope. She watches my every move. Hangs on my every word. Its sweet and miserable all rolled into one. I want to hop in my car and drive, but there is something inside me that warns me against hurting her. It goes against my nature. I don’t even date so the fact that I have a girlfriend that I live with is doing my head in. When I was released from the hospital, I planned on going home to my mother’s house, but the utter look of raw devastation on Liri’s face pained me. It made me want to hate her. I had Mom drop me here hoping that seeing the apartment where I have been living for the past however many months would make me remember but so far nothing has come back to me.
Her eyes though. There is something about her eyes, and when I peer into them, I feel like I know them. And yet I have no recollection of her. Those eyes sear me like she can see right through me. It makes me want to hate her even more.
“Towels are in the hall closet. All of your stuff is in the bedroom. I’ll just hang out in here while you shower or whatever. I have some writing to catch up on, but if you need anything let me know.”
“Okay.” Normally this is where I’d ask a girl to join me in the shower. Fuck her brains out then leave, but I live here and so does she. I may not remember her, but she doesn’t strike me as the kind of girl you fuck and bail on. I leave her to it and go into the bedroom to start rifling through the drawers for my clothes. I find her underwear drawer easy enough. Scraps of lace that probably are sexy as hell on her. I shake my head. I can’t get caught up in her physical beauty even if my body wants her. And man if I couldn’t strip her bare and get lost for a while. There’s no denying I find her attractive. She’s cute but so damn nervous. I guess I would be weirded out in her shoes.
I find my stuff and go into the bathroom, strip down, and start the water. I can remember all this simple little shit, but I can’t remember the one person who supposedly means everything to me. I don’t get the impression I was the world’s greatest boyfriend. I doubt I am deserving of her. Those blue eyes flash in my head. Her soft voice saying my name. I grow hard at the thought. Seems one part of my body remembers her at least. I try like hell to ignore the ache within me. The one that begs me to walk into that living room and take her on the floor then go out the damn door. It’s all I know. It’s what I do. I get what I want then never look back.
The hot water sprays down my back, and my need to have her intensifies. I can’t take the way she watches me expectantly. Those powder blue eyes begging me to remember, needing me to love her. Maybe she thinks she knows me, but she doesn’t. I’m not the good guy who plays house.
I’m the prick who uses girls and tosses them away.
Finishing my shower, I wrap a towel around my waist and strut into the living room. She’s laying back on the couch with a pencil stuck between her teeth. The way she is nibbling on it is cute. There’s a sketchpad on her lap but before I can get a good view at what she’s drawing she closes the book quickly.
“Hey. You find everything okay?”
“Almost.” I move toward her and she sits up, placing the pencil and notebook on the table.
“Anything I can help you with?”
I don’t reply. I don’t want to talk.
“Killian?” Liri’s brows lift at the same time as the corners of her mouth. I know she sees the hungry expression in my eyes.
“I don’t remember but maybe this will help me.” Grabbing Liri by the wrists, I draw her to her feet. I close my eyes and press my lips to hers. Fire burns in my veins, and I feel alive. My heart slams against my chest. Thump thump. Thump thump.
Pulse ringing in my ears, her nails sink into my shoulders. Moving her tongue with mine, she tastes of cheese and lettuce, but I don’t mind it. All my blood goes rushing to my dick, and I wonder how long it’s been since I’ve gotten laid. Liri leans into me, and I break away.
“How was that?” She breathes the words out rubbing her fingertip over her lips.
“Pleasurable.”
She laughs, and it’s music to my ears. The hair on my arms stands in awareness. My mind doesn’t know her, but my body damn sure does. It’s a dick thing to do, but I take advantage of the situation and her. I’m an asshole and being my girlfriend, she should know better…know me better.
“Killian…”
“Shh. Don’t talk.” I claim her mouth, thrusting my tongue deep in her mouth, taking all she will give. I ignore the nagging voice in my head that says this girl deserves better. Right now I want to be selfish. I deserve to be. I nearly died. I’m entitled to some fun, and she happens to be willing.
Grabbing the hem of her shirt I lift it over her head. She’s beautiful. Trailing my fingers over the pink lace cups of her bra a thrill shoots through me when a shudder trembles through her body in response to my touch. Yeah, she wants me…well her version of me that she thinks she knows.
Pink and swollen her lips part. Her tongue darts out, wetting her mouth. Pure desire flows through my veins. I can only imagine how good she’d feel wrapping her lips around me.
“Killian…I love you but don’t want to take advantage of your situation.”
My head goes back as I roar with laughter. Her take advantage of me? That’s comical.
“If you want me to stop…” I dip my head down and bring her lips to mine. “Just say the word.”