I bite my lip, and consider refusing. Without a good reason, turning him down would be childish. I don’t want to punish him by behaving like that. It’s in both our interests to achieve, and maintain, a decent relationship since we will be raising a child together. “Sure.” Taking time to fold the corner of the page that I’ve reread several times without absorbing any information, I set the book on the cushion beside me. He looks poised to assist me when I get to my feet, but I step away before he can touch me with the hand he seems to have raised only through instinct.
He sighs audibly, but says nothing about it. “Thanks.”
“No problem,” I answer, slightly aloof, as I walk beside him. When we take the stairs, I tense up. Is he planning to steer me into the master suite? Will he try to persuade me to have sex?
Will I let him?
Breathing a slight sigh of relief, I try to ignore a twinge of disappointment when we bypass the bedroom. Is he going to surprise me with a renovated room, turned into a nursery? My lips twitch. If so, he’s certainly being proactive, since I’m not quite eight weeks along yet.
Instead, he leads me farther down the hallway, to the door with roof access. Intrigued, I climb up the flight of stairs, wondering what he wants to show me on the roof.
We emerge into the sweltering heat and I shield my eyes from the sun. “Are we going for a swim?” I ask lightly, as we walk toward the pool.
“No.” He walks past the pool and lounge chairs around it. When Jayson moves slightly, I catch sight of a white building that wasn’t here before, and my heart skips a beat. I stop beside him when he comes to a halt.
“Is that a greenhouse?”
Jayson nods. “The workers set up everything this morning.” He gestures to the area beside it, where someone’s built raised gardening beds and filled them with rich soil.
I blink, speechless for a long moment. “Why?” I finally ask.
He turns to face me. “I want you to be happy, Harper. You told me you missed gardening during the time we’ve been married. I want you to have it back again.”
My eyes blur and I blink back tears. “I… I don’t know what to say.”
He pushes the hair off my face, tucking it behind my ear. “Say you’ll be happy here, with me.” Jayson pauses before adding, “Or say you’ll at least try to be happy. Seeing you mope around hurts me inside, agape mou.”
I meet his gaze and the air around us crackles with anticipation. “Why does it hurt you? My sadness won’t hurt the baby.”
Jayson runs a rough hand through his hair, betraying his frustration. “Not everything is about the baby. You are my wife, and I hate seeing you act like a prisoner serving a life sentence.”
Closing my eyes, I struggle to form a reply. “I’m doing the best I can.” His gaze is still locked on mine when I look up. “I can’t promise you anything, except I will stay until the baby is older. I don’t know if I can be happy with you.”
He jerks away, starting to pace. “You were happy on Trini Island. We were happy. Can’t we go back there?” Jayson stops in front of me, his expression a mixture of frustration and earnestness.
I shake my head. “I can’t. I don’t know what was real and what wasn’t. Or isn’t.”
Chapter 34
Jayson
“This is real.” I pull her into my arms, holding her still when she attempts to pull free. I can feel myself relax as I hold her tight, and soon she does too. She doesn’t try to get away when I lower my head to kiss her.
I kiss her gently, coaxing her mouth open to slip my tongue inside. Sure, anger prompted the kiss, but the soft strokes are becoming persuasive, not punishing.
With a moan, Harper threads her fingers through my hair, holding my mouth against hers. I’m sure part of her wants to stop. But I want her too much.
Cupping her breast, I gently thumb her hardening nipple. She inhales audibly and I immediately stop. “Did I hurt you?”
“Yes, a little, but in a good way.” A blush reddens her cheeks. Her heart is beating fast.
“I want to make love to you, Harper.”
She touches the tip of her tongue to moisten her lips, watching my eyes follow the movement. “Are there strings attached to your gift?”
My eyes widen, and I shake my head. “The garden is yours to do with as you wish. I wanted to make you happy, not try to force you into something you clearly find distasteful.”
As I step away, Harper moves forward, pressing her hand to my chest. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.” She rests her forehead against my shoulder. “I don’t trust you, Jayson,” she says into my chest, “and I’m not sure what you want, or why you wanted to stay married, but I know you wouldn’t force me into your bed.”