I was surrounded by darkness and it felt like something was pulling on me.
Everything hurt and I couldn’t fucking breathe—until I could.
A gasp tore out of my raw throat and my hands reached up, clawing at whatever was attached to my face.
Hands grabbed me by the wrist and restrained me. “You don’t want to do that,” someone spoke. I assumed the voice belonged to whoever held me down.
I blinked my eyes rapidly, searching for anything familiar.
Where was I?
“I’m Gail. I’m a paramedic, sweetie,” she said. “You’re going to be okay.”
My eyes roamed around t
he confines of the ambulance.
I was alive.
“We’re almost to the hospital. I’m going to give you something to make you sleepy. Okay?”
I don’t know why she asked. I was helpless to speak or to stop her.
I felt the needle pierce my vein and cold liquid entered my body. I fought against the sleepiness but there was nothing I could do. My lashes fluttered once, then twice, until they closed and I dreamed.
???
I was awake.
I knew that much.
But I couldn’t get my eyes to open and cooperate. I wiggled my fingers and sluggishly moved them up my body. All my muscles hurt and didn’t want to move. It was like they’d been inactive for too long. Maybe they had.
When my fingers reached my eyes, I rubbed and slowly blinked them open. The lights were bright but I didn’t want to close my eyes and submerge myself in the darkness any longer.
Looking around, it was obvious I was in a hospital room.
I remembered the time in the ambulance and then I realized what I had done.
“Oh God,” I gasped—or tried to at least, since I had no voice and my throat was so raw it felt like it had been scrubbed with sandpaper. I heaved over the side of the bed, but nothing came up. I was sickened by what I’d done. I had tried to kill myself all because of that fucking psycho. What the hell was wrong with me? A single tear slid down my cheek. I couldn’t believe I’d tried to do that to Caelan and myself. How selfish was I?
Where was Caelan?
Shouldn’t he have been here with me?
He wasn’t though. I was alone.
About the time I started to panic, the door to my room opened and a doctor strode inside.
“I’m happy to see you awake.” He smiled kindly, looking at the chart in his hand. “You did quite a number on yourself. Luckily, everything here seems to look good. Your throat is going to hurt for a few weeks though. I recommend you stick to eating something soft, like baby food.” He set the chart aside and grasped the bed rail in his hands. “You’re a lucky young woman, Sutton. The paramedics almost didn’t reach you in time.”
“I know,” I croaked.
“Now, the man they found with you wasn’t so lucky.” He frowned.
“W-what?” I forced the words out of my mouth even though it hurt more than I cared to admit.
“Don’t worry, he’ll be okay with time. He’s stabilized, but it was touch and go there for a while.”