Even broke a little.
You can do this.
The voice in my head warred with my brain. I wanted to do this – to give him the comfort he so clearly needed, but the fear that it wouldn’t be enough was hard to shake. The last time I’d tried to be someone’s solace, I’d failed.
Badly.
In the worst way imaginable.
I settled my hand on the back of his neck and wrapped my other arm around his waist. His body sank into mine and he sighed softly, his breath warming my skin.
We hadn’t had many moments like these, but when we did, it was always me taking from Cash. And usually just holding wasn’t enough, at least not for me. It was something Cash had long ago accepted about me. He’d accepted it on the very night we’d met. Our case had gone bad and while we’d managed to save the twelve-year-old girl we’d been sent to rescue from the guy who’d abducted her, the sight of her lying broken and battered on the bed she’d been tied to had done something to me.
I’d have killed the man if Cash hadn’t stopped me.
By the time we’d gotten back to our motel after we’d gotten the girl some help and had handed the assailant over to the police, I’d been on a downward spiral like none other. I’d been in the process of trashing my room and taking my fury out on my own body when Cash had practically busted down my door and taken control.
Of me.
Of the situation.
Of everything.
After throwing some cash at the pissed-off motel owner for the damage I’d done to the room and the commotion I’d caused, Cash had ordered me to sit down in one of the only chairs still standing in the room. When I’d fought him, he’d forced the issue until we were both lying winded on the floor, his heavy body pinning mine to the grungy carpet. And that’s when he’d known… when we’d both known.
I’d expected him to do what all the other men I’d let use me had done. I’d been ready for it, willing even. I’d wanted nothing more than for him to roll me over, pull down my pants and shove his cock into me so hard and so deep that the pain would take everything else away. There’d be no need to hurt the man who’d abducted and brutalized that innocent child or the motel manager for interrupting my rampage or Cash himself for daring to interfere.
Or myself for having failed another little girl who’d needed me to save her.
But instead of fucking me right then and there, Cash had calmly given me an order.
One simple order.
To get on my knees.
I’d obeyed because I’d wanted him to fuck me too badly not to. I’d figured the fact that he was going to shove his cock down my throat first was an added bonus.
But he hadn’t.
He’d done nothing but start putting the room back in order as I’d knelt there, waiting, needing. When I’d relaxed my body so that my ass was resting on my heels, his response had been quick and unbending. He’d coldly told me to get back on my knees and not to move again until I was told to do so.
Something had switched inside of me in that very moment. Instead of waiting for the dirty pleasure that came with letting him use me and throw me away, a spark of warmth had begun to flare to life deep inside of me – somewhere that hadn’t seen light in a really long time. But it wasn’t until nearly twenty minutes later when Cash had come to a stop in front of me, gently cupped my jaw and whispered, “Good boy” before stroking his thumb over my mouth that my world had righted itself.
Those simple words.
Good boy.
And I’d been whole again.
Unbroken.
Able to fucking breathe.
No, I hadn’t been foolish enough to believe it would last, but a drowning man surrounded by sharks would still grab a life preserver that was thrown his way, even if it only meant delaying the inevitable.
It had been two years and Cash had been delaying the inevitable ever since.
Only I wasn’t sure he really understood that… that there’d come a day where I fell so far and so fast that not even he could catch me.
Inevitable.
But today wasn’t that day. Today was a day where I needed to stop fucking thinking of myself for once and think of the man who’d spent the last two years throwing me life preservers.
I just held onto Cash as heat and steam began to fill the room. His back was tight beneath my fingers and I could feel his erection pressing against my groin. It didn’t surprise me in the least that he hadn’t taken his own pleasure when he’d made me – and Daisy – come.