“Daisy,” Sage began, but I put up my hand.
“No,” I whispered. “Please, Sage, if you care about me, you’ll pretend this didn’t happen. You’ll let me pretend this didn’t happen.”
I could see he was torn, so I used it to my advantage. “I have to go,” I murmured. I didn’t give him a chance to object. I merely stepped past him and shut the door behind me. The lock engaging sounded almost deafening to my own ears, but I also welcomed it for what it meant.
I was back in my sanctuary.
In the place where it was just me and my sometimes too-loud thoughts.
It was exactly where I was supposed to be.
Even if a little part of me wanted to be somewhere else entirely.
Chapter 3
Sage
I had my hand raised and ready to knock on the door when I came to my senses. As badly as I wanted to fix this, I didn’t know how.
I didn’t even know how the fuck this had happened.
One minute I’d been sucking Cash’s dick, desperately trying to make him feel all the things he always made me feel when we came together, and the next minute I’d been watching the woman I’d been obsessed with for the better part of a year get off as she’d watched me getting off.
My limbs began to shake as my body came down from what was left of the natural high that Cash… and Daisy… had given me.
I once again lifted my hand to knock on the door, but paused. I needed to apologize, but didn’t really want to.
Because I didn’t regret what had happened.
I couldn’t.
I’d been dreaming of moments like that from nearly the first time I’d heard Daisy’s voice. It was the same as it had been after the first time I’d met Cash.
Not surprisingly, the second I thought about my long-time lover, the guilt came crashing down on me like a ton of bricks. The man deserved so much better, but he’d chosen to be with a fucking basket case who wasn’t worth his, or anyone’s, time.
“Fuck,” I muttered as all the anxiety that Cash had managed to leach out of me just a few minutes ago came back with a vengeance.
I hated that I needed him again so soon.
And not sexually.
No, I relied on Cash for so many more things than sex.
I wasn’t sure he even knew how much I relied on him to keep me grounded.
To keep me moving.
How could he know, you asshole? You won’t fucking talk to him.
I sighed and stepped back from the door. I was tempted to just go wander off into the night, despite the late hour… and my state of undress. But I knew Cash would just come find me and we’d have the same conversation either way.
My skin felt itchy as I returned to our room. Cash hadn’t bothered to shut the door so I was able to get inside without my key, which I hadn’t thought to grab as I’d rushed after Daisy. I closed the door and locked it. Cash wasn’t in the main part of the room, but I could hear the shower running. My gaze fell to the spot on the floor where Cash had held me as he’d fucked my ass with his thick fingers.
And Daisy had watched.
As she’d touched herself.
God, she was so beautiful when she came. So different from Cash, but just as beautiful. Cash was hard and unyielding, even when he took his pleasure, while Daisy was soft and open. The idea of the two of them together – watching Cash work Daisy’s body until all that existed in her world was him – turned me on like nothing else.
Jesus, I really was a sick fuck.
I moved to the bathroom, fully expecting to find Cash in the shower, but instead, he was standing fully dressed in front of the sink, his hands braced on the edges of the small porcelain basin. My stomach fell at the sight of him staring at his reflection, his gaze empty.
No.
Anxiety curled through me as I whispered the word in my head again. Then came the shame.
The bone-deep shame that I wasn’t strong enough to deal with this Cash. He was always the strong one. He always knew the right thing to say, to do. I was the one who got lost in myself and he was the one to always pull me back.
With his words.
Or his touch.
“Cash,” I said so softly, I barely heard my own voice. But he heard me.
He always heard me.
He turned to look at me and I felt a sliver of relief go through me when something sparked in his gaze. He studied me for a moment, then held out his hand to me. I took it and happily let him cage me in with his arms so that my ass was pressed against the sink and his hands were resting along the edges, next to my hips. But when he dropped his head on my shoulder, something inside of me shifted.