“Yes. Oh my God, it’s amazing. You’re amazing…”
“We’re not done yet, April.” I hoped to hell she didn’t think that was it. I started to move, slow and methodically at first, but soon, my pace was quick and sharp. Her pussy clenched and convulsed around me, and it was so fucking awesome. She held onto me, and that was amazing too. April wasn’t the first woman I’d had sex with, but something about her was different. I hoped that when this was done, we’d be able to do it all over again, because I knew one time wouldn’t be enough for me.
My balls retracted, and my dick hit its threshold of friction. “Fuck, I’m gonna come…April…come with me…are you close?” I wanted to make her come again. I want to feel her pussy contract on my cock and shoot me off. I plunged in and her body went taut and her pussy clamped down like it was never going to let go.
Holy hell, I thought, as pleasure exploded from my dick outward. Like a tsunami, sensations flooded to every nerve ending in my body.
Now, eight years later, I still used that moment to get me off when I needed to take care of an urge. Now had been no different, as I grabbed a tissue to wipe off the cum on my belly at the memory of my first time with April. It had been the sweetest perfection, except for the moment of panic I had when I realized that I wasn’t wearing a condom. If she got pregnant, I’d have been well and truly fucked. But she’d planned our little tryst, so she must have been prepared.
A part of me wished I’d gotten her pregnant. If I had, I’d have stayed and there would have been nothing August could do about it. That I knew for sure.
Now that I was older, wiser, and didn’t give a shit what August thought, I wondered if maybe April, who was also older and wiser, and me could try again. There had been something between us. Something I hadn’t been able to let go of. It had to be something special, extraordinary. Something worth pursuing.
4
April
I woke the next morning wondering if I’d dreamt seeing Jude last night. After all, even though he broke my heart, I dreamed of him a lot. He was either touching me so lovingly like he had when we’d been together eight years ago, or he was riding in like a white knight and taking me and Maya away from here. Both versions of the dream had me waking up feeling angry and frustrated. Jude and I were over, so there was no reason to have my sexual fantasies still involve him. Second, I didn’t need a knight in shining armor to save me. I needed to save myself. I was smart and capable. Just because I’d let August take over and I was in a funk, didn’t mean I couldn’t steer my own destiny.
“Mama, I’m going to do a science experiment,” Maya said next to me at the kitchen counter as I made her lunch.
“Oh. Are you going to invent something?” I smiled at her, feeling so grateful to have her in my life.
She looked up at me, her blue eyes, so like her father’s, gleamed. “I’m going to find out what mushed peanut butter and jelly sandwich, carrots, and banana are like.
I quirked a brow. “Mushed?”
She nodded as she held her hands up, waggling her fingers. Then she took the cast-off ingredients remaining from her lunch preparation; bread crust, carrots, and a bite of banana, and kneaded it all together.
I made a face because it looked gross, and yet, I admired her curiosity and creativity. She definitely veered towards the sciences in her interests, and I made a mental note to find out about STEM programs for kids her age.
“Okay Einstein,” I said, picking up her plate with the sandwich, other carrots and half a banana and putting it on the table. “Wash up and eat up.”
Maya washed her hands, getting distracted by the bubbles floating up from her hands as she used too much soap. Then she jumped down from the stool she’d been on and came to the table.
I grabbed a cup of coffee and my sandwich, and sat with her. “So, what are you going to do for the rest of this Saturday?”
August walked in, took half my sandwich with a wink to Maya. I shook my head. For someone who thought I was too immature to run my own life, he sure acted like a dumbass boy.
“I have to head to the office to catch up on some paperwork,” he said.
So what’s new, I thought but didn’t say. He lived for work, and for keeping me here under his thumb. I tried to put myself in his shoes. It couldn’t have been easy, at twenty-one to take over my father’s firm. I’m sure many of the people there didn’t think he was experienced or had the leadership skills, but August proved them wrong. I admired that about him.
But eight years later, he had experience and was a leader, and yet still acted like he was trying to prove something. Whether that was to the people at the office or our deceased parents, I didn’t know.
I appreciated how much he helped me get through school and with Maya. We all lived in the family home, so I didn’t have to worry about shelter. I’d been able to get my education, although not as I’d originally planned. And I had a job with the firm too. Despite his controlling ways, he was very good with Maya. He was the father figure that Jude couldn’t bother to be.
But now, I was feeling antsy again to become my own woman. To stand on my own and be responsible for myself and Maya.
“I noticed some apartments for lease down near the office,” I said, testing the waters with him.
He glanced at me with a frown. “Why are you looking at apartments? The house is plenty big for all of us. It’s good for Maya to be around the home mom and dad made for us.”
I hated it when he tried to guilt trip me with our parents.
“Besides, it also makes more sense so we can carpool. And I can hang with Maya when you have your book club meeting or female empowerment workshops. And the biggest reason of all; Maya would miss her Uncle Auggie, wouldn’t you sweetie?”
“Yep,” Maya said around a bite of banana.