“I know it’s hard. If I want help, I can get it. Believe it or not, I have people around me who will help me with that. The thing is Paul, I have a life. I’ve made a life without you in it and that’s how I want it to stay.”
“You’re overreacting. It has to be the hormones. You’re pregnant right now and you’re going to be raising a baby by yourself. How can you turn away someone who’s offering you free help?”
“Because I don’t need it!” I yelled. Finally, we were starting to attract some attention on the street. I didn’t want to be there anymore. This was the only way that I could make things crystal-clear for him. I couldn’t be sweet and beat around the bush, I had to be blunt, brutally honest. Taking it to the edge and even hurting his feelings was probably what I would have to do to make sure he didn’t come back.
“Maggie, I’m just-”
“I don’t care. Don’t tell me. Don’t talk to me again, don’t look for me, stop following me around. You are no longer part of my life. This baby is not yours. Leave me alone.” I walked away from him.
I was shaking. I wasn’t scared yet. He was pushing the envelope, but I still felt like I had the upper hand. He didn’t scare me; he was boring me almost. He was pissing me off. I just wanted to go back to the way things were, when I wasn’t thinking about him anymore.
At my apartment, I double-checked my locks. I wasn’t scared… yet. After today, I knew that I touched a nerve. If he tried to retaliate, I wouldn’t know what to do. I didn’t know what he would try to do either. If he tried anything, I knew he wouldn’t care if it was just me. Another man however, he might not try to challenge.
I had to tell Toby.
Paul was unpredictable. Toby had power behind him. Just knowing who he was might be enough to scare Paul away and make sure he didn’t try anything. I got my phone out and called Toby. The phone rang. It kept ringing. It didn’t stop.
I ended the call and texted him instead. Putting my phone down I went to the shower and then came out and had a light dinner. Watching my phone, I felt myself get anxious. I had asked him to call so I didn’t want to fall asleep.
The one time I actually wanted to talk to him, he was unavailable.
27
Toby
“Mr. Anderson, Mr. Schultz, it’s been a pleasure.” Easton and I on one side of the table and our newest clients on the other side stood and shook hands.
I was lucky that Easton was there because I couldn't tell you what was said in the last half-hour that we had been in that room, but it seemed to have gone well. We walked the clients out to the elevator and saw them off.
“You know, if they call and don't want to work with us anymore, I'm blaming you,” Easton said.
“What?”
“You see,” he said as we walked away from the elevator. “You're still like this. What's going on? You need to get it sorted out because it's going to start getting in the way.”
I hadn't heard him then either, but I just replied in the affirmative because it seemed appropriate. I told him that I would see him later and went to my office. That was where my phone was. I had been thinking about it the entire meeting. The entire day to be honest. I just needed an update of some sort, something that let me know what was going on with her. I sat down and picked it up. Exactly what I wanted to see, her name in my notifications. It was a voice message.
I felt my heart pounding from nervousness. She might as well have been in the room with the way I was feeling about opening her voice mail. I played the message and held it to my ear.
“Don’t talk to me again, don’t look for me, stop following me around. You are no longer part of my life. This baby is not yours. Leave me alone.” It cut off after that. I played it again. It was her voice, there was no doubt about that an
d there was no doubt about what she was saying to me either, even though I didn’t want to hear it. I felt like there was nothing between my ribs and pelvis.
I called her back. There was no way this was happening. It was fake or I was hallucinating. She would never talk to me like that.
So sure of yourself, huh?
Why was I so sure of my place in her life when it was so hard to get a hold of her and even harder to get her to stay once we were in the same place together? If there was a baby involved, she should have been wanting to get closer to me, not further away.
If there was a baby involved, she would have told me already instead of doing it like this.
More assumptions.
Obviously, I had no leg to stand on when it came to Maggie. I barely knew her and she didn't want to change that with me, but a baby? Fun and games were over if there was a baby involved. I didn't even know what I wanted her to do or say, I just needed her to talk to me.
The phone should have rung but it didn't. A voice told me that Maggie's number was no longer receiving communication from mine.
“What the fuck,” I mumbled, trying to call her again. No way. No fucking way. She blocked me.