“Claudia…”
She heard the exasperation in his voice, but she decided she didn’t care. Not this time. She was done playing his games.
“Look, I know this isn’t easy for you.” The confusion in his green eyes told her he had no idea what she was referring to. “Avelyn told me. Actually, she didn’t tell me much… Only that there’s something in your past, something that happened during the war and for which you’ve never been able to forgive yourself. I don’t know what that might be, I can’t even begin to imagine, but from what she told me, I did understand that it’s hard for you to talk about it.”
Karl tensed even more. It was nice that Avelyn tried to help every time she thought she could, but the truth was she was usually making things worse.
Claudia searched his eyes, but it was impossible for her to read him. She sighed and continued.
“I can be patient, Karl. I meant what I said yesterday… I love you. But you have to trust me. You have to let me in. We can make this work, I’m sure of it. I can feel it.”
“You were afraid of me yesterday.” He kept his voice cold and distant. Detached. He didn’t want to lose it again. It would have been a disaster.
Claudia laughed nervously. “I’m sorry… you… you took me by surprise. I wanted to come after you after that. I just… I didn’t know…”
“I’m glad you didn’t.”
His words hurt her, but she dismissed the pain, didn’t let it grow in her chest and overcome her resolve to have a normal conversation with him.
“I know you love me too.” It was time to make him confront his own feelings. “Matt showed me your messages.”
A flicker of anger danced in Karl’s eyes. He tried to remember what he had texted Matt, and when it starting coming back to him, he cringed visibly. He couldn’t think about those messages. They were too embarrassing. And the thought that Claudia had read them… he squeezed the armrests so hard that the wood squeaked in his palms, letting him know it might break. He struggled to relax.
“Why didn’t you call me?” she asked, her eyes pleading. “Why didn’t you answer the phone when I called you? Why is it so hard for you to admit that I mean something to you, that you want me to take the cure and spend my life with you? Why is it so hard for you to tell me the truth? Whatever it is, I won’t judge you. Whatever happened, it happened a long, long time ago. Hell! I wasn’t even born then!” She spread her arms to the side as if to show him how ridiculous the situation was.
Karl shook his head.
“Believe me, you don’t want to know. If I tell you, it will change everything between us.”
“Not telling me is already changing everything between us.” She made a pause and looked at him until he avoided her gaze. “Tell me about the scars on your back. Do you also have them on your chest? Is that why you never let me touch you?”
An old, dark memory flashed before his eyes, and he felt the long scar on his right shoulder burn. He stood up and started pacing the space behind the desk. He could feel his wolf stir inside him.
“Claudia, I can’t do this right now. I… I have work to do.”
“Work? Is work really more important than this?”
“Yes. Yes, it is.”
Claudia folded her arms over her chest and relaxed against the backrest.
“Well, tough luck, because I’m not going anywhere until you tell me what’s going on. Why don’t you want to turn me into a hybrid?”
Exasperated, he turned to her and said between clenched teeth: “You have to leave. Now.”
Pain stabbed her right in the chest. She bit her lip before speaking in a soft, even voice: “Leave where? Should I go back to Alma Venus?”
“Claudia, no. Please understand, I can’t do this right now.”
“Because I have no problem going back there. If you want me to leave, I’ll leave,” she pressed on.
Karl ran his hands through his hair.
“Or do you want me to move to Schloss Blackmane? If this is a marriage of convenience and you only bought me because Avelyn insisted, then I’ll move there and spend the rest of my life with the clan. Would that suit you? Then, when I’m too old to be of any use to you, you can buy another bride. A bride you actually want, not one who’s been imposed on you by an overzealous family member.”
He simply stared at her. Where had those ideas come from? No, he didn’t want her to leave. Well, he did. But he wanted her to leave the room for a couple of hours so he could think, not go back to Alma Venus or Schloss Blackmane. Then, why couldn’t he open his mouth to tell her that?
Claudia waited for a moment, and when he didn’t say anything, she stood up and headed to the door.