I turned back to the stove to finish cooking my own eggs. “I’m glad. You’re going to be a wonderful mother.”
“Look at me, dammit.”
I squeezed my eyes closed before taking the pan off the burner and sliding the fried eggs onto my plate. Once I was settled across from her at the table, I met her eyes again. “I’m listening.”
“I don’t regret everything that happened between me and Nick. I need you to hear that and understand it.”
I shook my head. “If only I’d—”
“No. I begged you to introduce me to him. When you and I lived next door to each other, I saw him drop you off or come by for dinner or to watch a game with you or whatever. Every time I saw his handsome face, I daydreamed about being with him. You finally agreeing to introduce us wasn’t the same thing as forcing him on me, regardless of your damned savior complex.”
I gritted my teeth. She was right. She had begged me. But I still felt like if I hadn’t brought him around our building, she’d have never found herself in his destructive path. Tessa had moved into the apartment next to mine for security, so she could live in the city but still have someone to rely on like family. We’d grown up together in Encino. We’d known each other for years, and then I’d accidentally hooked her up with a criminal. But she was right. She’d begged me for an introduction, and obviously I hadn’t known Nick’s true nature at the time.
“Fine,” I said finally. “But you need to know I don’t feel like taking care of you is a burden. Taking care of my friend and her baby is a privilege. Besides Nick, you’ve been my closest friend for five years, Tess. I love you, and I want you to be happy and healthy. I want the same for that baby. Let me do this. Let me take care of you right now. We’ll figure the rest out later. As you can see, I have plenty of room. When the crazy people from Hollywood aren’t overrunning the town, I actually have time on my hands, too.”
Her face softened into a smile. “I’m looking forward to it. Shawn showed me around a little, and I really like it here.”
Her cheeks turned pink at the mention of my deputy.
“Did you tell him everything was fine with the pregnancy?” I asked, finally tucking in to my breakfast.
She nodded. “He was worried. He kept texting to make sure I didn’t need anything. Apparently one of his cousins had to go into Denver for similar tests, and he remembered how stressful it was.” She blinked down at her food. “He’s very sweet.”
I agreed and mentioned just how often he’d asked after her the day before at work.
“He did?” she asked, snapping her head up. “Why? I mean… why in the world would he care so much?”
I rolled my eyes. “Gorgeous single woman looking even more gorgeous thanks to a healthy pregnancy? Golly gee, Tess. I surely don’t know.”
She reached out a foot to kick my shin. “I know we were kidding around the other day, but nobody wants to date a pregnant woman. Do they?”
I put down my fork and met her eyes again. “I am gay. Really very gay. But even I can see how gorgeous you are. Even I want to take care of you and be there for you. Maybe there’s something about seeing a woman so pregnant that calls up our protective instincts. I don’t know. But I can tell you this. That man is goofy for you. Penny asked me if she could send over a fruit basket, and Shawn damned near tripped over himself offering to deliver it for her. I don’t think Shawn was kidding.”
She blushed again. “He asked if he could take me to the movies, and I said no.”
That surprised me. “Just because he’s interested doesn’t mean you have to be. It’s okay to say no.”
“But… I am interested. I just feel…”
“If you’re trying to be loyal to Nick, stop that shit right now. I can’t think of anyone who deserves it less.”
Tessa shook her head. “That’s not it. What if I fall for Shawn and he…”
I finally got what she was so afraid of. “What if he turns out to be an asshole, too? That’s something we’re always risking when we give away our hearts, isn’t it?”
We ate our breakfast in companionable silence for a little while before she spoke up again. “I think… I think I’m going to ask him if he wouldn’t mind taking me to Walmart to get some baby things. He said he can help me pick out the basics, and if we have questions, he can call one of his sisters or his mom.” She hesitated a beat. “And maybe I’ll be able to tell how he really feels about my pregnancy, you know? If he looks uncomfortable or acts weird when faced with the reality of diapers and stuff, I’ll know to be more careful.”