Well done, Lior.
Felix didn’t say anything immediately, just studied me. As if I hadn’t just said something explosive and monumental.
“Say something,” I breathed. “Tell me I’m being a spoiled brat. Tell me to suck it up.”
Instead of saying either of those things, he just leaned in and hugged me.
Felix’s hands came around my neck and pulled me to him until I felt like his entire body was holding me in unspoken support. I turned my face into the side of his neck and inhaled the comforting scent of him. There was something so soothing about the man. He radiated calm unlike anyone I’d ever met before.
When he pulled back to meet my eyes, I saw the twinkle of mischief in his eyes.
“You’re just having cold feet, Lio. You’re going to make a wonderful king someday.”
I realized he didn’t understand how imminent my reign would be. Of course he didn’t. That information was a massive secret. One that, if it got out, would throw the media into a frenzy.
“What if it’s sooner rather than later, Felix? I’m gay. I can’t be gay when I take the throne.”
Felix snorted. Actually snorted with laughter.
“It’s not funny,” I cried. “It’s my fucking life, Felix.”
His eyes shot wide, laughter dying immediately as his face dropped. “But, Lio. You are gay. Which means you will be gay when you take the throne. There is absolutely no way to stop being gay. We both know that. Plus, it’s the twenty-first century, Lio. The world can handle it.”
“No. The world can’t handle it.”
“But Luxem—”
“Stop. Please. I know all about the prime minister. That’s not the same thing as a hereditary monarchy reaching back hundreds of years. Can you even imagine if Prince William were gay?”
I noticed his jaw clench and his nostrils flare. “Yes, as a matter of fact, I can. I think it would be fucking fantastic if Prince William came out. Someone needs to be the first.”
“Well, it’s not going to be me.”
So what if I sounded like a child?
Felix paused for a beat before trying a different tactic. “Then what’s your plan, exactly? Be celibate for the rest of your life or try and stay hidden in the royal closet?”
And there it was. The story of my fucking life reduced to one simple question.
Chapter 20
Felix
It wasn’t my place to interfere with how he made his life decisions. And, quite frankly, it wasn’t even like me to get involved in discussions about someone’s personal business. I tended to keep myself to myself, but for some reason, it rankled me to see Lio so upset. It was almost like an itch under my skin. I sensed his discomfort and frustration and wished like hell I could fix it for him.
“I’m sorry,” I said. “I didn’t mean to push. It’s really none of my business.”
Lio’s hands snuck up the back of my shirt, and I felt my skin prickle at the touch of my bare skin.
“No, Felix. I’m the one who’s sorry. It’s just a shitty situation, but it’s nothing new. I’ve known this was coming for a long time. I’m having a hard time accepting it; that’s all.”
“So, what’s your plan, then?”
He shrugged and looked past my shoulder to the fireplace. “Go home, grow up. Marry a nice woman who’ll make a fine mother to my children.”
I felt my stomach pitch into my throat. The very idea of him marrying a woman just to appease tradition made me want to throw up.
“Seriously? You’d do that?”
Lio’s forehead leaned against my chest, directly over my heart. I brought my hands up to brush through his thick hair.
“I don’t have a choice, Felix,” he murmured. It was so soft, I almost didn’t hear the words over the snapping of the fire. “It’s what I was born to do. I’ve always known that was my path.”
“That’s not exactly fair to the woman involved,” I grumbled, grasping at straws.
“Maybe not. But whoever signs up for this will obviously be getting a lot out of the bargain.” His voice held sarcasm, and I knew he’d spent hours upon hours in his head trying to justify his future actions.
“I guess so.” It was all I could think of to appease him and let the subject drop. I wondered if there was a way I could get him out of his head and out of the funk he’d fallen into. “Will you take me to bed, Lio?”
When he lifted his head, there was a sexy smirk on his lips and a hint of relief in his eyes.
“Hell fucking yes.”
Before I even had a chance to crawl off his lap, the panel to the red salon slid open and his sister stepped into the room.
“There you are. I should have known,” she said. “Been looking all over for you.”
I shifted to get off Lio, but his arms tightened around me to keep me in place. My cheeks flamed in response to Henriette seeing us that way.