‘Oh, but it does. It matters a lot. It matters more than anything else in the world that you realise how bitterly I regret the things I said to you that night.’
She shook her head, because hadn’t her nurse training taught her always to see the other person’s point of view? ‘It doesn’t,’ she repeated, as generously as she could. ‘We all say things we sometimes regret when we’re angry. Or even when we’re not angry. It’s okay, Drakon. Honestly.’
‘No, it’s not okay,’ he flared. ‘It’s anything but okay. Stop trying to be kind and reasonable, even though those are the very qualities which drew me to you in the first place.’
‘Stop talking like that and just tell me why you’re here, Drakon,’ she demanded, her voice trembling with anger, because she didn’t need to know these things. In fact, weren’t they making the situation even worse?
‘I’m here because I miss you, Lucy,’ he bit out. ‘I miss you more than words can ever say and in every way—physically, mentally and emotionally. And Xander misses you, too.’ He shook his head. ‘I can’t believe I didn’t even let you say goodbye to him.’
‘But Xander has a nanny,’ Lucy put in fiercely, because it wasn’t fair for him to do this to her. To put her heart through the wringer all over again, only to leave her high and dry. ‘As you told me on the night we parted. Just as you told me you couldn’t tolerate a woman who had lied to you. And as for not saying goodbye to a baby of that age—what difference would it have made? Xander is too young to have realised what was going on and it would only have upset and confused the baby and Sofia.’
‘But that wasn’t why I did it,’ he persisted. ‘Why I wouldn’t allow you to go to him.’
‘No. I realise that. You did it to punish me because I had failed to live up to the image you’d created of me as your ideal woman.’ She drew in a deep breath. ‘Because that’s the truth of it, isn’t it, Drakon? You’d put me on a pedestal and that’s where I was expected to stay. The nurse. The virgin. The mother. And you didn’t like it when I blurred those roles, did you? When your good girl became a good-time girl and seduced you in the back of the limousine, you could hardly hide your dismay. You couldn’t bear to accept that I had flaws, just like everyone else—or that I was a real person with real needs. Maybe if you hadn’t been so intent on perfection, I might have had the courage to tell you I was infertile before. But I didn’t want to risk you not marrying me,’ she admitted huskily, because what did she have to lose now? ‘I had an opportunity to do just that when we first discussed it, over lunch in the Granchester that day, when you presented me with my engagement ring.’
‘But you didn’t?’ he questioned slowly.
‘No, I didn’t. You didn’t ask why I didn’t want children of my own and I was glad you hadn’t, because in that moment I was living the dream and I didn’t want to wake up from it. And like I said, we didn’t really know each other—there was no expectation that we would ever care for each other—so why would I confide something so intensely personal?’
There was silence for a moment and when eventually he spoke, his voice was very low. ‘What if I were to tell you again that I’m sorry for what I did and that I care very much? What if I were to tell you that my life has been empty without you and that I love you and want to spend the rest of my life with you and our son?’
Lucy couldn’t prevent the surge of hope which flooded into her chest, but she quashed it and forced herself to ask the question which still hung between them, like a dark spectre. ‘But you want more children, Drakon!’ she declared, her voice shaking. ‘That hasn’t changed. You want more children and I can’t give them to you.’
‘I wanted more children with you,’ he corrected sombrely. ‘And if that isn’t possible, then I will count my blessings and be content with the family I’ve already got. All I’m asking is for another chance, Lucy. To show you that I mean what I say. To love you in the way that you deserve to be loved.’
Lucy stared at him as those two words resonated more than any others. Another chance. How could she deny him that, even if she wanted to? Because how many people would give everything they owned for one more chance? Her brother would have liked the chance to have dodged that stray sniper’s bullet—and if that had happened, her mother would never have faded away, like the blowsy roses which grew in the walled garden at Milton school.
She swallowed, knowing that this was the biggest and most important decision she’d ever had to make. If she accepted Drakon’s offer, she would be taking a risk and she had never been a natural risk-taker. But what was the alternative? To turn him away and say goodbye? Yes, she might get hurt if she stayed with him—that was a very real possibility in every single relationship—but wasn’t she being given the opportunity to spend the rest of her life with the only man she had ever loved? And wouldn’t the hurt of turning him away transcend any other pain she’d ever known?
Because Lucy had glimpsed a world wi
thout Drakon in it and it was a bleak one. And maybe this place in which they now found themselves was the best place of all. One where all the barriers and fears with which they had surrounded themselves had crumbled away and all that was left were two people who loved each other and wanted to be together. She clasped her hands together as if in prayer and looked at him with all the tenderness she had never dared show before.
‘Yes, Drakon,’ she said softly. ‘Yes, to everything you ask of me. Because I love you, too. I love the man I see beneath the hard layer you present to the world—and I’d like the world to see more of him.’
He nodded as he took a step towards her. ‘Just know one thing, Lucy.’ His voice was shaking as he pulled her into his arms and buried his face against her hair and she could feel his powerful body trembling. ‘That I won’t ever let you down. Not again.’
But Lucy knew that already, in the only place which mattered.
She knew it in her heart.
EPILOGUE
‘YOU’RE NOT COLD?’
‘Cold?’ Lucy smiled up at Drakon. His arm was protectively clasped around her shoulders and she thought how handsome he looked in his dark dinner suit and black bow tie. ‘Not at all. Mainly because I’m wearing thermal knickers.’
‘Are you joking?’
‘Of course I’m joking, darling. Do you really think I would have passed over all that deliciously decadent lingerie you bought me for Christmas in favour of a pair of sensible pants? And besides...’ She snuck a glance at the jewel-studded wristwatch she’d also found nestling at the bottom of her stocking a week earlier. A delicate watch with ink-spot sapphires he’d had made specially. ‘It’s not long to wait until the fireworks.’
Her husband’s black eyes gleamed as he studied her. ‘Do you know how much I love you, Lucy Konstantinou?’ he questioned softly.
‘I think I’ve got a good idea. Just so long as you understand that the feeling is completely mutual, my darling. S’agapo.’
Noting Drakon’s nod of contentment at her increasingly confident use of Greek, Lucy took the opportunity to look at the lavishly dressed guests who were milling around, drinking champagne beneath the fairy lights on the roof terrace of the Granchester Hotel as they waited for midnight.
‘People seem to be having a good time,’ she whispered. ‘Don’t you think?’