“What do you want?” Clarissa asked and crossed her arms.
“To talk,” Skull said.
“About what?” Clarissa asked, “It’s too late for confessions and besides I’m not a priest.”
“Lame,” Skull shook his head.
“You’re one to talk,” Clarissa sighed, “Come inside before you wake the whole of the building.”
“Thanks,” he said coming inside.
Clarissa shut the door and locked it slowly, putting off the moment when she’d have to turn and face him. When he looked at her with his deep brown eyes and she’d feel weak in the knees. The moment when she’d want to kiss him, to pull him into her arms and not let him leave. Clarissa was startled from her thoughts by Skull wrapping his arms around her waist and resting his chin gently atop her head.
She wrapped her arms over his and leaned back into him for a moment. Clarissa inhaled his scent smelling the bike, the wind, and freedom. A soft sigh escaped her lips as she relaxed. She knew she should pull away from him, but she couldn’t. Love—was that what she was feeling? Clarissa wasn’t sure. How could you love someone you didn’t know? Was it even possible? She had known Justin most of her life and thought she had loved him at one time, but now she knew it never was love. It was attachment, safety, and familiarity. So what was drawing her to Skull? Mystery? Freedom? His bike?
Clarissa liked all of those things, even if she was slow to admit it to herself, but it was more than that. She wanted to fall into him, to bare her body, mind, and soul to him. To have him touch the raw spots of her existence. To allow him to know her as only she knew herself, but she couldn’t. She couldn’t give herself over to someone who kept so much from her. To someone who didn’t want to let her in.
Clarissa turned slowly in Skull’s embrace and looked up at him. Their eyes met for a moment before his lips claimed hers. She wrapped her arms around him and surrendered to the kiss. Her lips moved against his trying to tell him everything she couldn’t put into words. Her tongue danced with his, probing deeper into his mouth trying to touch on the hidden part of him, the part that he kept secret from her.
Clarissa’s hands moved to his face and touched his cheeks gently. She thought he trembled for a moment, but she couldn’t be sure because her hands were still trembling. Breaking the kiss for a second she looked into his brown eyes and saw a sadness that she wanted to erase, a pain she wanted to heal. Clarissa nibbled his lower lip and renewed the kiss. As their tongues danced together they moved to the sofa.
Clarissa lay back, pulling him with her. She leaned up and deepened the kiss as a fire began to rage in her belly. Skull tossed aside his leather jacket before tracing her jaw line with a single finger. Clarissa arched her back and looked up at him. He pushed aside the fabric of her robe and leaned forward kissing her neck gently. Clarissa’s fingers trailed over his shoulders and back.
Skull’s lips traveled down her throat to her collarbone before reaching the modest cleavage Clarissa’s nightgown left exposed. She bit her lip as her nipples hardened at his approach. Skull rested his head against her breast and Clarissa played with his hair, running her fingers through it and touching his scalp.
Skull rose and kicked his shoes off. They landed on the carpet with a soft thud, but Clarissa didn’t scold him for not taking them off at the door. Her pulse was racing and she wanted more of him. Her body trembled as she waited for what Skull would do next.
He rested his head against her br
east again, resting his weight against her. Clarissa stroked his hair not sure how to tell him she wanted more. That she wanted to give herself over to what was quickly forming between them. She opened her mouth to speak, but hesitated. Skull’s breathing was slow and steady. She cocked her head to the side so she could see him better and grinned. He had fallen asleep. Clarissa rested a hand on his shoulder and stroked his hair with the other. For now he was safe from whatever he could have been getting into with Lobster and the others. For the moment he was here with her. Clarissa kissed the top of his head and fell asleep feeling his gentle heartbeat against her body.
Chapter Nine
Skull rose gently from the sofa and kissed Clarissa’s lips softly. For a moment he stayed as he was, looking down at her. Asleep, her beautiful face was free from the worry and stress she usually wore. He almost touched her cheek, but stopped himself. He didn’t want to wake her up. This was the way he wanted to remember Clarissa if things went wrong tonight.
He hadn’t intended to stop by her apartment at all, but he saw that her bedroom light was still on when he drove by. Skull had argued with himself as he performed an illegal U-turn and pulled into the parking lot. He had to see her one more time, just in case.
Skull gently covered her with the blanket that sat on the back of the sofa before retrieving his jacket and boots. He turned the lock slowly and opened the door. For a moment he considered closing the door and returning to the sofa. Skull shook his head and left before he really did change his mind. He had come too far to turn back now. He was closer to finding the truth than he had ever been. This was almost done, for better or worse.
He took the steps down, because he didn’t want to encounter any of Clarissa’s neighbors in the elevator. Skull pushed his bike onto the road before starting the engine fearing that Clarissa would hear it and come running out after him. Skull could tell that she knew that he was ass deep into a tight spot, unlike any of the numerous girls that had watched him since he had begun to frequent the AlleyCat. Clarissa knew he had secrets and she wanted to know them. He’d tell her once things were settled, if he survived. If he didn’t, he hoped that Hugo or one of the other guys would tell her what he had been trying to do.
As he drove towards his apartment the expectant, loving look on Clarissa’s face as she looked up at him the night before haunted him. She had expected that he’d go all the way with her, her eyes and body called out to him, but the way her cheeks flushed and her body trembled told him she had never been all the way before. He wouldn’t have believed it with most girls her age, but he could believe that Clarissa was waiting for ‘the one’ before giving it away.
Skull felt guilty for leaving her to wake up alone, but he knew he couldn’t be the one, not yet. If things went south tonight he didn’t want her to have given up a piece of herself for nothing. He didn’t want to be the scar she wore for the rest of her life.
Chapter Ten
“Skull?” Clarissa whispered reaching her arms out searching for him, “Skull?”
She opened her eyes and blinked. Had it all been a dream conjured from how much she missed him? Sitting up Clarissa looked around the room and stretched her arms above her head before heading to the bathroom. Small clumps of mud and dirt lay scattered by the end of the sofa where Skull’s boots had fallen in the early morning hours.
Clarissa smiled at the memory of his weight pressing against her body as they kissed, but where was he now? After washing her face Clarissa started the coffee pot and retrieved her cellphone. The little red message light was blinking indicating that she had a voice mail.
“Hi, Clarissa, this is Debbie. You called about buying my car yesterday? If you want we can meet up sometime today and you can take her for a test drive,” the message said.
She called Debbie back and set up a meeting for six this evening. Clarissa would have the cash in hand and if the car was acceptable she would drive it to work. She poured herself a cup of coffee and stumbled out to the balcony. Clarissa enjoyed the fresh air feeling her senses, drawing her from the sleepy world she inhabited until she was adequately caffeinated each day. She had tried to kick the habit several times before, but had recently given up on it. As long as she worked in a coffee house Clarissa was going to be addicted to caffeine.
“Skull,” she muttered under her breath and smiled. His name tasted delicious on her tongue and made her wish that he had at least woke her up before he left. She would have enjoyed a goodbye kiss.