“Gotta go,” Clarissa grinned and sprinted off to join Julie.
“See aren’t you glad I’m noisy,” Julie giggled as they ran through the food court and out the front door.
“Thanks,” Clarissa laughed to hide the fact she wanted to cry.
Then there was the two times that Skull had stopped by her apartment. The first time was a week after their encounter in the mall and fortunately, Clarissa had been working late and hadn’t made it home yet. She wouldn’t have known he had stopped by at all if he hadn’t left a note.
“Hey Bookworm,
We need to talk. We’re having a party for Lobster’s birthday tonight at the AlleyCat. See you there?”
Clarissa had wished he signed the note. He didn’t need to, because who else had a friend called Lobster and hung out at the biker bar, but she would have liked to see how he signed his name, even if it wasn’t his real name.
Clarissa changed into a green tank and a long brown skirt and walked over to the bar. She stood outside for a few minutes before walking away.
“I can’t,” she shook her head, “No. Just no.”
She walked home torn between wanting to run back and demand answers and wanting to run home as quickly as her feet would carry her. Torn between the two emotions she walked slowly as if her feet were weighed down by stones.
“You can’t change him,” she told herself, “and you can’t save him.”
Weeks passed and Clarissa had settled back into the routine she followed before Skull, before motorcycle rides and biker bars. She slept most of the day before work and read until she fell asleep when she returned home. Went to the movies with Julie on Wednesday nights and shopping at the mall Saturday afternoons. She should have been happy that her life was back to normal, but she wasn’t.
Early Friday morning found her laying awake staring at the ceiling. Large stacks of books she had already read cluttered her bedroom threatening to topple over if exhaled too hard. Clarissa sat up and leaned against the wall. Her eyes were wide open even if the red numbers on the clock read five fifteen AM, which was usually about the time her eyelids would grow heavy from exhaustion.
Before Skull, she’d force herself to finish the chapter she was on and go to sleep, if it wasn’t a cliffhanger. If it was she’d make a pot of coffee or grab a soda or energy drink and finish the book and maybe start on its sequel if it had one. This morning all she could do was envy the girl in the book she just finished. She had managed to change the bad boy, jerk, ass hat of a bully she had fallen in love with.
“Books lie,” she whispered to the empty room and her words bounced around before echoing back to her ears.
Clarissa laughed at the echo, but it was a dry, bored sounding laugh.
Knock! Knock!
“Great,” Clarissa sighed, “Now I’m hearing things.”
She flopped onto her side and hugged her pillow close to her trying to trick herself into thinking she was tired.
Knock! Knock!
“Who in the hell would come to see me this time of the morning?” Clarissa sighed and sat up, “It’s most likely Julie. Maybe Chad broke up with her again?”
They had been in an on-again-off-again relationship for the last few weeks. Chad had been in their graduating class and up until recently she had liked him fairly well, but having to hear her bestie cry about him twice in the same week had changed her mind. Maybe it was that way with all guys, maybe it didn’t matter whether they were on the chest club or drove a motorcycle. They were just jerks.
Knock! Knock! Knock!
“Hang on!” Clarissa called out, “I’m coming! Give me a blasted minute to get some damn clothes on.
Clarissa pulled her black knee length nightgown over her head and sprinted towards the door, grabbing her robe from the back of the sofa. She rose to her tiptoes and checked the peephole. Skull stood on the other side of the door running a hand through his hair. Clarissa’s heart skipped a beat and with trembling hands she opened the door, intending to tell him to shove off.
“Hey,” he said giving her a sleepy grin.
“What’s up?” she asked, holding the robe tightly around her.
“Can I come in?” Skull asked,
“Yes. No!” Clarissa said unsure of what she was going to do.
“Which is it then, Bookworm?” he asked.