His breath had grown shallow and more frequent. “You’re bored, aren’t you?”
There was no way he could know. When you’re having sex three to five times a week, quitting cold turkey would be a shock to your system. No way could he have guessed that I was desperate to keep myself occupied. I searched his face for some sign that I was wrong.
“I’m not bored.” I let out a heavy breath and when our eyes met, those mesmerizing brown depths settled on mine, and I couldn’t lie to him. “I’m restless.”
“Do you ever think about that afternoon?” he whispered. He reached out to place his hand on my hip, but I stepped back again. I had zero control of myself right now and the thing I wanted more than anything was suddenly too close for comfort.
“I think about that night.” He pointed to his desk. “When I fucked you in that exact spot.”
My stomach fluttered and I had to dig my nails into my thighs to keep myself from jumping him.
His eyes were shifty, moving from one spot on my body to another, taking in the slight heave of my chest, the quiver in my stomach and my stocking-covered legs.
Fuck me sideways, this man was killing me. Actually, I’d give anything for him to fuck me sideways. Frontward. Backward. Any way. Just as long as his dick was inside me.
Right. Fucking. Now.
“I’ve fantasized about the next time we’d be together.” His words were gruff, like the rumble of thunder in my ear. “How you’d suck my cock.”
He stalked toward me in one giant, elegant stride. His erection was in touching distance and my fingers itched to reach out and grab it, but I retreated. Unfortunately, the desk prevented me from gaining any more distance. A sly grin curved at the side of his mouth. My hands tightened around the edge of the desk as he approached, his body almost close enough to press into mine.
“I think you’d like it if I laid you on that desk and pulled out my cock. If I fucked your mouth while you fucked yourself with your fingers.”
His scent swirled through my nostrils like an aphrodisiac. My breath caught in my throat as he leaned over, hoping, willing him to kiss me. He reached out and with one finger traced the side of my cheek, across my shoulder, and down my arm until he hovered between my legs.
At this point, I had zero shame. I lifted my pelvis, hoping for some kind of contact. But his hand was too quick. His need to stay away from me too strong to fulfill my wish.
“Maybe you’d like it if I spread your legs and fucked you again.”
“Yes,” I croaked out the word. The space between my legs throbbed; like its own damn heartbeat, it pulsed in time with the rapid beat of my heart.
He hummed in my ear. “If I fucked you, baby, I wouldn’t be gentle.” I bit my bottom lip and this time it was his turn to groan. “I wouldn’t be thinking about your needs. It would be hard. Fast. Because I take what I want.”
I lifted my head and our eyes met. “Take anything you want.”
Overwhelmed by the electricity coursing between us, I lunged forward and captured his lips, my hands pressing against his cheeks so he had no choice but to let me do it.
I moaned into his mouth, and that sparked his participation. With his hands around my waist he pulled me forward and just like he had in front of the camera, he devoured me. My entire body tingled with the force of his lips, and suddenly I couldn’t remember why I had promised myself I’d stay away.
But just as fast as it had started, it ended. He pulled away, sucking in a deep breath as he stumbled back.
“I don’t deserve you, Grace.”
I gulped down air in sharp breaths, trying to calm the need buzzing across my skin, but I couldn’t control the flutter of my heart at the sound of my real name on his lips.
“I’m not the happily ever after type.” His words were like a shot to the heart. “Never will be.”
And that’s when I remembered exactly why I had promised I’d stay away from Ben Lockwood. I wanted a man who would put me first. A man who believed in monogamy. Ben was too wrapped up in his own world to think about anyone but himself.
“It’s best if you learn that now, rather than when it’s too late.”
He didn’t have to worry.
I might be looking for my happily ever after, but not with him.
Not with Ben Lockwood.
Chapter 8