Radek gave him one more kiss on the cheek before getting up. “It’s almost weird to wear clothes after living in the skin of a fox for a month. You ever feel that way?” He stretched, showing off every freckle. Before the day ended, Yev would kiss and touch each and every one of the flecks adorning that smooth skin. But now it was time to adjust to their new situation.
He pulled away, placing his feet on the floor and grabbing Radek’s hand to pull him up. The smooth hair swept his face, and he couldn’t resist the urge to hug Radek’s beautiful form that still faintly smelled of the soap they used during their early-morning shower, once the knot had shrunk.
“Not really. But when I lived in the city and couldn’t shift often, I missed the freedom of running all night, of breathing the fresh air, and hunting down my meal.”
“You lived in a city? I can’t imagine how that worked. Where?” Radek grinned at him as Yev led him downstairs by the hand.
“Lublin. I studied forestry, because Father thought we needed to fight humans with their own weapons, so they wouldn’t encroach on our territory. It was… a different life. Not only because I ended up earning a new language,” Yev said, walking toward one of the cabinets in the living room. It contained clothes Olek used whenever he came over in his wolf form.
His time in Lublin had been one of great discovery. For the first time, he’d been free to pick from a large pool of men instead of satisfying his secret needs with whoever was locally available at a given time. His superior sense of smell made it easy to pick the correct targets, and that was where he’d gained an identity as a gay man. But the city was also polluted, crowded, and loud, and it hadn’t allowed him to roam freely.
No place ever had offered him a truly satisfying existence.
“Did you go clubbing all the time? I bet you had your pick of guys. I studied tourism, and I often went abroad. Even visited Kiev a few times, so I know you get additional attention when you’re a foreigner. I actually speak Ukrainian,” he added the last bit in Yev’s native language.
Yet another box checked on how Radek would fit in if he moved into Yev’s village. Only that he wouldn’t, because he was a gay man.
“Really? That’s not something I come across often, even here, close to the border. Did you have a Ukrainian boyfriend you wanted to impress?” Yev asked, opening the drawer and picking up a set of sweatpants, T-shirt, and hoodie, along with socks and underwear.
Radek laughed. “There was this one Ukrainian guy I met on a trip, but no. I thought that it could be a good combination with the tourism studies. Why? Did you have Polish boyfriends?”
“I fucked Polish guys,” Yev said, snorting as he presented Radek checkered boxer shorts and kneeled to help him put them on. “If I had a boyfriend, hiding who I am would have become… impossible.”
“Right. The knot.” Radek sniggered, but stilled when Yev encouraged him to put his foot into one of the legs. “I… You don’t have to help this much. I probably should figure it out myself.” But the way the hairs on his forearms, bristled from distress, told Yev a different story.
Yev let the boxers settle on Radek’s hips, and while they were baggier on him than on Olek, it was still a decent enough fit.
“It’s okay. We’ll figure this out,” Yev said and showed him the socks.
Radek stood on one foot to allow Yev put one on him, and it hit Yev that any of his brothers or cousins would have sooner died in a ditch than allowed this. But he liked the ease with which Radek accepted his help.
“I just… It’s been a month, but it actually feels really sudden. There’s all these things I didn’t have to do with my hands when I was Ember.”
“Give yourself time. I’m not going anywhere yet,” Yev told him and pulled the sweatpants up Radek’s legs. It was clear Radek’s were longer than Olek’s, which resulted with uncovered ankles, but the fabric tie at the waist helped Yev adjust the fit around his waist at least.
He shouldn’t have thought of a human as a pet, but he couldn’t help comparing this moment to brushing Ember’s fur. Should he brush Radek’s hair like he used to do for Ember?
“Thank you,” Radek said when Yev helped him put on a T-shirt. “I know deep down that I have to face this. It’s not gonna go away just because I want it to.” He rubbed his eyes with the collar of the T-shirt. Was he… crying?
It had been so much easier to deal with Ember’s sulking. Hesitating, Yev froze with his hands still on the hem of the T-shirt. “Do you… want me to do something? What do you like to eat? You know, other than the yolks,” he attempted to joke.