I fixed a hand on the doorknob and pulled air into my lungs, desperate to find a blank expression to hide the hurt and anger, and yanked the door open.
I was determined not to let this crush the day. Just a few more hours. Then, it will be negotiations on salary and discussion of which office would be mine, and I could sort the personal stuff out at home tonight.
Lunch was left in the fridge. I was too full of churning emotion to want to eat. I broke down and purchased a third can of Diet Coke from the vending machine while Logan disappeared from his office and went to have lunch with her. My silver can of crack and work weren’t enough of a distraction, and my mind worried about what he was doing. There was so much history between them, I couldn’t even fathom it. I tortured myself relentlessly. What if she didn’t want closure, but wanted him back? I imagined her begging him for another chance, telling him she was willing to compromise for him.
“Can I see you in my office, Evelyn?” His deep voice caused me to jolt in my seat. By the time I’d turned to face Logan, he was already halfway down the aisle.
As soon as he shut the door, his arms encircled me.
“No.” I pushed away from his hold, but it was futile. He blew out a breath and I could smell the faint hint of alcohol. “You had drinks at lunch?”
“Yeah. It was difficult, and I’m glad it’s over.”
His clear eyes rendered me motionless. It was over between him and her, at least I could tell that wasn’t a lie.
“I’m also not looking forward to the conversation about the management position,” he added.
“No, I can’t imagine Kathleen will take it well.”
He left me standing by the door and paced to his desk, running a worried hand through his hair. “I’m sorry if I hurt you. I don’t ever want to do that.” The expression on his face was heartbreaking, and I fought the urge to soften. I believed he didn’t want to hurt me, but he’d done a piss-poor job of it.
“Like I said, I’m pissed, but we’re at work and we’ve both got things we need to do. We can talk about it later.”
He sank down into his seat and worry grew on his face. Was he really that torn up about Kathleen? I sat down in the opposing chair.
“We both know you don’t have a problem being direct,” I said, “but be honest with Kathleen. Do it fast, and then try to listen when she responds.”
“That’s how you’d want it done?”
Something was off. He’d fired Austin with his cold professionalism intact, or so I’d heard, and that had to be much harder than letting someone know they’d lost out on a promotion.
“I’m not saying you shouldn’t soften the landing. Make sure you tell her she’s a great designer. She’ll be upset, but she’s an adult and can handle it.”
“I hope so, Evie.” His expression changed, like he was done fighting whatever had filled him with reluctance. “I need to speak with Evelyn now.”
The air around me shifted, and I should have seen it coming.
“While we appreciate you expressing interest in the position,” he said, “we’ve chosen to offer it to a different candidate. You’ve got a great career ahead of you here, and—”
“No, Logan.”
“—think you’re an excellent designer, the best I’ve—”
I shot to my feet so fast I got dizzy. “Why?”
God, his face. He looked like his own words were destroying him. “This morning Will asked if we’d slept together. I could’ve lied and said no, but it didn’t matter. He’d already made up his mind.”
“You wanted me for that position before we started dating.” I couldn’t organize my thoughts. “Over time, they’ll see I earned it and you didn’t hand it to me because I was your girlfriend.”
“It’s too damaging to both of our careers. You’re young. You’ll have plenty more opportunities to advance.”
It was all slipping away, my dream job vanishing before my eyes. Taken from me because of the simple mistake of uttering my name. His mistake.
“Don’t do this.”
He took an enormous breath as if steeling himself. “It’s already done. Kathleen accepted the position twenty minutes ago.”
I stumbled backward, away from his eyes that frantically searched mine. With all of his lies this morning, the roller coaster of emotions, and now this, it was too much. I couldn’t take any more, and it broke me.