ME: You realize I’m pissed for real.
BELLA: You realize that doesn’t scare me…
ME: You realize it should, right?
BELLA: ...
Damn her and her dot dot dot shit. She shouldn’t fuck with me, because she’s soooo damn easy to embarrass. Guess it’s time I remind her of that.
“Someone change the subject!” Maverick barks, apparently fed up with everyone giving him hell about the amount of interest his mother’s profile has. “Anything. Anything at all. Just talk about something else, or I’m leaving.”
“Fine, fine,” Dane says, laughing as he shakes his head.
“The girls are going to some bar Leo’s boyfriend opened up,” Wren says, supplying the subject change Maverick has demanded.
Wren rakes his chips in as we toss down the final cards. I swear, somehow Wren has gotten luckier, because I’m giving him more and more money each damn game.
“Wait,” Maverick says, holding his hand up. “You mean there’s going to be a new bar in a different town where chicks won’t know who I am, and no one has told me about this?” he asks in disappointment. “Fuck that. We’re crashing girls’ night.”
“I’m good with that,” Dane says with a smirk.
I ignore the spurt of excitement that announcement gives me, because I refuse to believe it’s because I can’t wait to see Bella. Maybe it’s because I want to throttle her for the MILF thing.
The guys make a plan to crash girls’ night, and I decide to play it cool and warn Bella. That way she doesn’t think I’m chasing her around like a pussy-whipped bitch.
ME: We’re crashing girls’ night. Maverick’s panties are in a wad that he wasn’t invited.
BELLA: Didn’t realize he’d grown a vagina.
I snort back a laugh to keep from drawing attention to myself.
ME: I think it’s pussy envy.
BELLA: I’ll give him his pussy back if that’s the case. The hairless wonder is tasting me all the time.
ME: Really? What’s she tasting?
BELLA: OMG…. No. Gross. You sicko. I meant TASTING!
ME: That’s different?
BELLA: Duck!! No! I mean TESTING! E not A
BELLA: Fuck not duck.
ME: Well, fuck a duck. ;)
BELLA: ..l..
ME: The hell is that?
BELLA: Me flipping you off.
ME: Send me something dirty.
BELLA: After you’ve been an ass? And now you’re crashing girls’ night? AND you threatened me earlier… Totally don’t deserve a dirty pic.
ME: I’m not crashing. I’m just following the crashers.