“It’s still fairly new,” I say awkwardly.
She looks like I just stole her favorite lollipop and fed it to the dog.
“But you like him?” she goes on.
Why is it so hard not to laugh and mock him mercilessly right now? Oh, I can’t wait until I can.
“Yes. I like him.”
Her smile returns, and she beams at me. “Well, then. I’ll be right back.”
She pretty much zips by me and heads toward the door, and I take a seat by Ethan, grinning like the hippo who just found the perfect mud hole. Damn hippos are even in my conscious state of mind now.
He rolls over, glaring at me like he wants to smother me with a pillow.
“Don’t say it. Not one fucking word, Bella,” he cautions.
“You’re such a closet momma’s boy!” I whisper-yell, barely stopping myself from bouncing around in glee.
“No the hell I’m not.”
“Awww. It’s adorable.”
“Bella,” he growls, still glaring at me.
His mother walks in, and I wipe away my taunting grin, trading it for a sweet and innocent grin. Ethan watches her with a wary eye as she nears us with some sort of scrapbook. The second he sees what it is, his eyes widen and he actually pales.
“Mom, don’t fucking bring that damn thing in my house.”
“Ethan Markus Noles. Don’t you use that language in front of a lady,” his mother scolds, and… yeah… I barely stop myself from losing it.
My entire body is shaking with silent laughter, but she doesn’t notice.
“Yeah,” I say, looking at Ethan as I fight with all my strength not to laugh. “Don’t use that language in front of me.”
He mouths, “Fuck you,” and I snort, then cough to clear the trace of laughter from my tone.
“What have you got there, Mrs. Noles?” I muse, smiling over at his mother as she sits down on the love seat.
I go to join her, even as Ethan tries to grab me before I can get up. Fortunately, he’s currently too weak to react quickly enough.
“Call me Arlene,” she says with a broad grin as she flips the book open and thrusts it at me.
Trying not to burst out into a fit of laughter becomes my primary objective when I see the book is titled “Ethan’s Future Wedding.”
“This is very interesting,” I confess as Ethan groans and covers his head with the pillow.
“I’ve been working on it for so many years. I was starting to wonder if he liked boys the way that sweet boy Leo does, since he never brought home a girlfriend. That’s why there’s an entirely different wedding scenario in the back of the book.”
Ethan strangles, and my eyes fill up with tears as I hold back the laughter on the tip of my tongue. Leo would so love to be here for this right now.
“You planned my gay wedding?” Ethan asks in disbelief, though his voice is muffled against the pillow.
“Yes,” Arlene says seriously. “Yes, I did. I was hoping the two of you would adopt as soon as you got married.”
She goes back to work, flipping through the pages as though she’s searching for something, and Ethan squeezes the pillow closer to his face.
Me? I’m in heaven right now. Arlene is freaking awesome.