His footsteps pause for a beat, then he’s walking toward me again as relief fills him. When he crashes to the side of the bed and leans over me, I don’t know what to expect. But he carefully maneuvers around the numerous pads attached to me that are monitoring my vitals and my baby’s vitals, most likely.
Then he’s hugging me, pressing his lips to my forehead as his body shakes against me.
“I’m so sorry,” he says hoarsely.
“This wasn’t your fault,” I immediately point out, slipping my arms around his waist.
I’ve forgotten how good it feels to have him holding me, and that ache that’s been in my chest slowly starts to dull. When your world is rocked and tilted, you realize how instantaneously it can all be gone.
Nothing in the past seems to matter anymore, in this moment.
“I’m sorry for everything. I’m sorry I wasn’t there. I’m sorry I walked away the other night. I’m sorry I fucked everything up. I love you, and I’m sorry I didn’t say it sooner. Fuck, I’m so sorry about everything, Bella.”
My heart stills in my chest, and I replay his tortured words, wondering if I’ve heard him right.
“I’m so, so sorry about the baby,” he says in a pained whisper. “I swear I’m going to get you through this, and I won’t ever fuck anything up again. One day, if you want to, we can even try again.”
My brow furrows in confusion as he squeezes me tighter, kissing my forehead with such a soft graze.
“The baby?” I whisper.
His body shakes again, and I push him back. He relents, lifting off me promptly.
He turns his head away and wipes his face like he doesn’t want me seeing him. My heart breaks when I realize what he thinks.
“Ethan, no. No, shit. No. The baby is fine. Everything is fine.”
Why the hell didn’t they tell him already?
His head jerks to me, his brow crinkled with confusion.
“What? How? There was—”
I pull the sheet back, revealing my very exposed, freshly stitched leg. Ethan’s gaze darts to it, and I heave out a sad breath.
“We’ve come full circle. Broken glass. A jagged cut on my upper thigh. And a hospital. It’s even the same leg as yours. I needed stitches instead of bandages though.”
He swallows hard as his gaze flicks back to mine. “You’re okay though?”
I nod slowly.
“And our baby’s okay?”
I nod again, ignoring the tears pricking my eyes at hearing him say our baby.
His entire body visibly relaxes, and he drops to me, hugging me so tightly that it almost hurts. I’d hug him back, but he has my arms trapped right now.
“Fuck, Bella. I was so sure… I just… I didn’t realize how badly I wanted this baby until I thought he or she was gone.”
He eases his hold just enough for me to wrap my arms around his neck. After almost losing our baby, nothing else seems to matter. Everything toxic that was between us just disappears, and I cling to him, absorbing the way it feels.
“And you love me?” I whisper. “I thought you’d hate me once you realized you no longer had the future you envisioned.”
He tenses at that, and when he pulls back, he’s glaring at me. “Nothing is more important than you and our baby, Bella. Never would have been. I guess I suck at showing it, but everything else took a backseat the day I met you. I slowly shifted my priorities without even realizing it, and honestly, the fucking parties sucked after a while. It just gets old when there’s no one there that I care about, or anyone there who cares about me.”
My smile slowly crawls up, and he thumbs my chin. I don’t stop him when he bends down and kisses me, even though I’m annoyed with the fact it’s a soft brush of his lips, as though he’s afraid I’m made of glass.
When he pulls back, I cock an eyebrow.