It was almost three weeks, but it feels like years—in a good way. Bella actually gets me—all of me. And she’s the first person to ever act like all of me is exactly what she wants—minus the partying, of course, but that’s just a hobby and not actually a part of me.
Blowing out a breath, I go to tilt her head back, brushing my lips over hers. I’m so damn confused that it’s not even funny right now.
“We should head over to Rain’s,” she says on a long sigh as I withdraw from her.
Yet another cookout. It seems my friends love their mellow nights, and sadly, I’ve started enjoying that more than the parties I’ve looked forward to for years. Not that I’ll admit that aloud, because I’d never hear the fucking end of it.
Maybe a night with them will distract me from the hellaciously confusing thoughts Bella has stirred by leaving my house. For some reason, I’m a little pissed at her, as though she’s breaking up with me instead of just simply moving back to her house. It was temporary. So why does it feel like she’s leaving me instead of absolving the temporary arrangement?
I need a fucking drink. Now.
“Yeah. Grab your stuff, and I’ll drive.”
“I’ll drive us home if you want to drink,” she states, falling back in step with our easy flow, even though we’re not in the same house.
“Why don’t you ever drink?” I ask her as we walk out.
“I sometimes do,” she says with a shrug as I open my car door for her to get in on the passenger side.
She waits until I’m seated behind the wheel to continue.
“I just lost interest in getting drunk after Allie had Angel. I always wanted to be someone she could depend on if she needed me. I have to be in the mood to get drunk in order for it to happen, and I haven’t had that mood lately.”
I just nod like I understand, even though I don’t. With the exception of Rye, none of my friends have ever tried to rely on me for anything. And Rye only needed someone who could take a punch when he was so full of rage and sought an outlet.
He needed to hit something, and I needed to feel pain—since it was all I could feel at that time. Until I discovered sex also works, of course. Obviously I didn’t do that with Rye. Pain was always a substitute after that.
My inner ramble halts when Bella leans over and rests her head against me like it’s the most natural thing in the world. Yeah… I really don’t want her to fucking move out. It’s tempting to pay someone to go back and move all her shit into my house while we’re over at Rain’s.
Deciding that’s insane, I push the thought out of the forefront of my mind, ignoring the corner it has been shoved in. Somehow, Bella came in and took over everything, becoming the thing I want the most instead of everything I thought I’d want.
And I have no fucking clue what to do about it.
Chapter 52
BELLA
Ethan’s arms are wrapped around my waist, and I’m leaning against him as Allie talks to me. His chin is resting on my head, but he stays quiet as Allie and I discuss the hospital drama I’ve been enduring, cementing her decision not to return to that scene.
She looks so happy, always smiling. I know Wren plays a huge part in that, and I love him like a brother for that, even if he has seen a picture of me mostly naked and choking on a banana while demonstrating a blowjob for Allie. Sheesh.
“Ethan, come check this out,” Wren calls, and Ethan releases me with what feels like some reluctance.
“I’ll be right back,” he says before kissing the top of my head and going to see what Wren wants.
Corbin and Tag are with him, both of them watching something on Wren’s phone and laughing. I watch until Ethan joins them, and his annoyed expression smooths into a genuine smile.
“I’d say this is definitely getting serious.” Allie’s words break me out of my staring trance, and I clear my throat while facing her again.
She’s giving me a knowing grin, and I roll my eyes.
“He’s not a thief, cheater, or much of a liar, so I guess I judged him wrong,” I say with a shrug.
“He’s also a party boy who is slowly being domesticated. Wren was just saying how Ethan blew off poker night because you two had plans the other week.”
Frowning, I try to think of anything we had planned, but nothing comes to mind.
“It means he didn’t feel like leaving you for a few hours to play some cards,” Allie informs me with a teasing lilt when I grow silent.