I hate the sun more everyday, I thought as the stupid golden rays denied me a late morning. Instead, I was forced to get up early. I needed dark curtains. And I'd be getting some soon.
I looked outside to see my siblings and their soul mates sparring. They were practicing and preparing for a fight I wouldn't be a part of.
I laughed when no one wanted to go against Ayla. She shrugged, though her smug smile told her secret. She enjoyed their fear, and she loved being able to feel it.
Ayla was certainly the most dangerous because of her power. Tallis had explained to me how different from draining it was. He said when you're drained, your thoughts are gone as well as your memories, but your emotions are intact, and you can be healed. Ayla's magic pulls your emotions out; you feel absolutely nothing, no desire at all to be alive, and you become a prisoner inside a void that leaves you numb. It took them a year to heal the one girl that she had accidentally hurt, and that was when her magic was weaker. Of course Ayla would never do that to any of my family, but no one was brave enough to risk it all the same.
I went outside to join them, and Ash quickly took my side. Her perky upbeat tone was in full effect. "How is eighteen?"
"It's nice." I waved with Ash as Desmond left, and he waved back, though he seemed... off.
"Where's he going?" I asked, confused.
"He has something special planned for me later. He won't give me any hints though. I assume it's a real date. We haven't exactly done that yet. We've been distracted with preparation. I'll meet up with him later."
Her eyes were glistening with excitement. There was something so different about her these days. She had always been perky and happy, but now it was more than that—she was glowing.
"Oh. That's great," I said with a smile.
I hugged her, holding her to me and wishing some of her ecstasy would transfer on to me. As I pulled back, I said, "I know the two of you will be happy together."
"Aria, I'm sure he'll come back soon."
I wasn't expecting her to say that. I didn't want to talk about Tallis, but the filter on my mouth apparently needed to be replaced when it all started pouring out.
"Ash, do you think it's possible that I'm right? Do you think we're soul mates? Or do you think we're just linked like he says?"
I felt tears prick my eyes, but I took a deep breath and held them back as I awaited her response. I wanted her honesty, and if I started crying, she'd never give it to me.
"I don't know, Aria. I wouldn't have thought it impossible a year or two ago, but now I don't know.
Jay is with Ayla and I'm with Desmond. The Verdans seem to fit well with us. I can't be sure. But at the same time... Aria, he shouldn't be toxic to you if it's meant to be." Her words echoed my own hidden thoughts, and I fought back the tears. He wouldn't be toxic if he was meant for me.
Ash looked at her watch before sympathetically returning her gaze to me. "I have to go for now. But I'll call you later, okay?"
"Yeah."
As she was leaving, Selesha sat down beside me, her defeated posture matching mine.
"Hey, Aria."
Her voice wasn't as peppy as normal. Her southern twang was still as defined as ever though. She looked at Jay and Ayla as they kissed, but she cut her eyes away abruptly, wincing as though it hurt to witness.
These days, I understood, even though I prayed I never had to see Tallis with someone else.
"I'm sorry, Selesha," I said softly, offering her an encouraging smile.
She didn't look up, though, so the forced smile went unnoticed.
"I knew it wasn't likely that he was my soul mate, but I couldn't help but fall in love with him. I linked to his human emotions before he transformed, and afterwards, we knew it wasn't real. We still had attraction and chemistry, and he still had some feelings left over from his mortal life.
"We were in love in our own way, but I knew this day would come. I had hoped I would find my soul mate first, but I guess destiny had different plans." Her unshed tears wavered but never fell, as she took a breath. "It still hurts because I haven't found my other half. And it'll hurt for a while, but everyday gets better. I remind myself that it wasn't real. You'll get there, too."
I shook my head. "I think the pain is actually getting worse everyday. Nothing seems to help. I'm just learning to hide it better."
She laughed, though it was a brief sound. "Maybe that's what I'm doing, too, doll. Who knows?"
She leaned back against the swing, her tomboy stance making me smile. I wished I had her confidence. Even broken she seemed so strong.